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Article by Alma_ posted hace más de un año
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Chuck Norris Jokes

-Some people wear superman pajamas. superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

-Only Chuck Norris knows the true end of the movie Inception

-When Chuck Norris throws a boomarang it doesn't dare come back

-Do tu know how many push ups Chuck Norris has done? All of them

-Neil Armstrong never went to the moon for NASA, he was trying to run away from Chuck Norris

-Chuck Norris knows the letter after Z

-Chuck Norris was the alien who told the Egyptians how to invent the pyramid

-What's Chuck Norris' favorito! Number?....................CHUCK NORRIS

-Superman wears Chuck Norris underpants.

-When Chuck Norris falls out of a barco he dosn't get wet the water gets Chuck Norrised

-Chuck Norris doesn't read books, he just stares them down until he gets the information he wants out of them.

-Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
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Opinion by Alma_ posted hace más de un año
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Why Did the Chicken cruzar, cruz the Road?


George W. Bush: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road o not. The chicken is either with us o it is against us. There is no middle ground here.

Bill Clinton: I did not cruzar, cruz the road with THAT chicken. What do tu mean por chicken? Could tu define chicken, please?

Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road o the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Bill Gates: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which will not only cruzar, cruz roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.

Grandpa: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken had crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

Martin Luther King, Jr.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cruzar, cruz roads without having their motives called into question.
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Opinion by adaug posted hace más de un año
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"Next...Come in!"Mr. Franklin said.When i walked through the doors,I thought."Wow,this is...it!My first job interview!"I waited for him to tell me to sit down."Sit on the couch."Mr. Franklin commanded.
"Oh...Okay."I sat in the middle of the couch."So,What's your name?Full name?"He asked."Jenifer Grace Golike."I answered."How do tu spell your last name?"He asked looking up from his clipboard."G-o-l-i-k-e."I replied."Okay,have tu had any job...experience?"He dicho taping his pen on his paper."Does a limonada stand count?"I thought,but of course,NO."No."I decided."Okay,tell us about your background,as a child?Growing up?"Mr. Franklin said.Mom didn't say he would ask that!"Well,as a child..."

1989,January 16,Six years old.
"Jenny!Lunch!"Momma called."Coming!"I dicho running downstairs,I found a place to sit."Okay!"I dicho waiting to eat."Sandwiches,Potatoes,Carrots,And Peas."Mom dicho lining out food.My siblings came running inside from the backyard."Boys!Wash up!Stop playing in the dirt!"Mom demanded."Eww!Worms?Boys are disgusting!"I said."That's what I told your Aunt Sam,Next thing tu know she's got 5 kids!"Mom told me while she was putting the potatoes on our...
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Opinion by amy36y posted hace más de un año
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nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan
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List by SymmaGirl2 posted hace más de un año
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Yup. título says it all. Let's start, shall we?

The lost Hero...in my pants.
The Sum of all Fears...in my pants.
Green Eggs and Ham...in my pants.
Fairy School Dropout...in my pants.
Washington's Crossing...in my pants.
Diary of a Wimpy Kid...in my pants.
Lock and Key...in my pants.
Merciless...in my pants.
Citizen Soldiers...in my pants.
Joy of Cooking...in my pants.
Emotional Intellegence...in my pants.
Good to Great...in my pants.
Twenty Wishes...in my pants.
Finally...in my pants.
cruzar, cruz My corazón and Hope to Spy...in my pants.
I'd Tell tu I amor You, but then I'd Have to Kill You...in my pants.
Hannibal Rising...in my pants.
Shoot Him if He Runs...in my pants.
Genius...in my pants.
For Hearing People Only...in my pants.
Brotherhood of Warriors...in my pants.
Where the Red helecho Grows...in my pants.
Rascal...in my pants.
Into the Wild...in my pants.
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Article by VilleValoGirl posted hace más de un año
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The air of deep colours hovered over my head,
magnetic, enchanting splitting colours.
I levered the illusions listening to rosado, rosa Floyd.
my veins never felt the blood this way;
speeding to give a bloc to my mind
free the soul from this bib body.
Apagoge the world is in my command
but dreadful the vision may end,
I was marijuanaised.

The leaves found its way to leave the seeds
smothered with tobacco, the grass
no longer stayed as allied.
Rolled in an ashen paper with a soft bud
these were the signs, I have had heeds.
My lungs felt the grey smoke, opening to the miracle
and insignificant the world around
I esteemed the powers of the that white stick
glowing and shining the colours surround.
My mind went at ease
gathering the colours
just then I inked these words
dragged right out of the white smoke
when hands were observing peace.
I was marijuanaised
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Article by The_Random_Guy posted hace más de un año
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The three little pigs (edited version)

Once appon a time, There were three pigs named Dakota, Kelsey and Jessica. They had a problem... A lobo named Gibby was trying to kill them!
"Kelsey, Do tu want to come with me to go find Jessica?" Dakota asks.
"Sure." respuestas Kelsey.
They walk outside and look in the forest only to see Jessica setting up traps for the wolf.
"Jessica, What the f*ck are tu doing?" Asks Kelsey.
"What does it look like I'm doing...I'm putting up traps to see if I can catch Gibby." She says as she looks at Kelsey with an annoyed expression.
"Calm yourself..Damn!" Says Dakota as she looks at Jessica.
"I agree with Dakota." Adds Kelsey.
"Ok, ok..Anyway, what do tu guys want?"
"We just wanted to make sure tu were ok." Says Kelsey.
"I'm fine, just really bored so I decided to make some traps."

Immidately after Jessica finneshed her sentance, Gibby jumps out from behind a tree.
"Haha! Your traps wont work now because I know where they all are!" Says Gibby with a smart attitude.
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Opinion by koolkat-1104 posted hace más de un año
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I believe in my corazón that we shouldn't have to change o selves o stop following our dreams just for someones approval because this is our life and they have to live theirs if we have a dream that our corazón is at then we need to go after it and ignore those haters because they'll make tu stronger.For example if tu want to be a singer be a singer,If tu want to be an Artist be an artist.If tu want to be different and original than be original because tu have to fulfill your dreams.If tu stop because of haters ,you will never feel happy o complete and you'll let the hater win por giving him o her o whatever power.Don't tu ever let anyone discourage tu and make tu feel tu can't do something tu really want that's in your heart.You can't give up on your dreams just to make that person happy because you'll never feel happy for yourself and your letting that person win power.If tu ignore them and keep going after your dreams tu will be a winner and feel happy.Everyone has haters even the people that don't strive to be great.You have to stand up for what tu believe in deep down and follow your corazón and don't let judgement stop you.Some may say they are fantasies But i...
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Article by tokidoki123 posted hace más de un año
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Slam a guy in the head with hungary's pan,make gilbird peck someone,Throw a vodka bottle on someones head,Yell pasta,Find someone in a tomate box,Shoot someone with germany's gun,Show your disgust through the piano,Romano headbash/choke somebody,Buy plenty of sausages at the mart,Call someone Romano/Italy style,give dirty libros for christmas,ask england to marry you,get a cangrejo stuck in your head,Make bad tea,whip your hair back and forth with france,Eat Too many burgers,talk to panda man,Order the ''F*ck box", Get kidnapped too many times,Float through the air screaming Vodka,Eat pastas, pasta with vodka,Become one with mother russia (Ja?),shoot a missle into englands head,Summon russia,call someone a potato eating bastard,try to sneak into your siblings cama at night,Go Kolkolkoling,Go ahh-ah-ahh when someones yelling,get a curl on the parte superior, arriba of your head,Get your hair enredados with someone else,*Out of breath* I'm can't finish this over my awesomeness What am i going to tell tu tu ask? im telling tu me and england's bringing sexy back!
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Opinion by hetaliaitaly posted hace más de un año
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Allen Walker
Gaara
Neji Hyuga
shikamaru Nara
Death the kid
Duke Devlin
Zelgadis Greywords
Valgaav
South Italy
North Italy
Germany
Japan
Spain
Near/Nate River
L
Tsubasa otori
Shun kazami
Kiba inuzuka
Claus von herson
Kaoru Hitachiin
Hikaru Hitachiin
Deidara
Itachi Uchiha
Izumo and Kotetsu
Toushiro Hitsugaya
Hatsuharu Sohma
Kyo Sohma
Shigure Sohma
Leader summa/pein
Hidan
Yugi
Soul Evans
Ikuto Tsukiyomi
Envy
Wrath
(there are más but i cant be stuffed naming them um comentario if i have missed any male anime dudes tu like and i will add them i will do a girls one soon)
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List by someone_save_me posted hace más de un año
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These are just some, más will probably be added later.

I hate:
-Animal abusers
-Child abusers
-Butthurt moralfags (If tu get mad at me saying moralfags, well then, tu must be new here. I'm not homophobic.)
-3/4 the mainstream crap on the radio
-Jersey Shore
-Homophobes
-People who don't thank tu when tu open a door for them
-Toddlers and Tiaras
-People who are always snooPING AS usual I see. /shot so fuckin' hard
-Fuckers who judge people por their appearance
-When my computer breaks down
-Fangirls who get mad at if tu aren't borderline insanely obsessed with the same thing they are (Go on the Michael Jackson club and see my point.)
-Homework
-School
-Dolores Umbridge
-Skeptics of every little thing. No I don't mean I hate atheists o agnostics.
-Tumblr (No one murder me.)
-Rules
-People who disrespect their parents for no reason, like if your parents have always been nice and not strict to tu and tu just shit on their paperwork o something. Not cool, man.
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Fan fiction by SheWolf11 posted hace más de un año
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France
Honhonhon! Bonjour English man! Grow a real dick and don't fuck with Peter Pan! I'm Francis Bonnefoy and everyone loves me! tu call me a wanker, cause mine is the biggest! Fuck off with your kid brother, cause USUK surely hits it!

Britain
SHUT UP! tu DAMN FROG FACE! The fact that your on the same continent is a disgrace! All tu are is a bloody wanker, my rhymes hit hard, like Captain Hook's anchor! Your just a bloody whore, I can't stand your face no more, your such a prick! Even Sealand has más dick! I have an army of Red Coats! tu have shitty little boats! Waiting till the last minute? And yet, tu still have the knack to boast!

France
Silly little England, tu were never really great! Your eyebrows are one of the things that I hate! They call France the most romantic of places, the least tu could do is give your people toothbrushes and braces! All tu have is a really big clock, my Eiffel Tower makes panties drop! Why do tu say bloody so much? Are tu on your period? Sealand has más dick? Are tu delirious?? tu over rated bastard, with your accent and tea, people need to realize that the greatest is me! I am Republique...
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Article by ivoryphills posted hace más de un año
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As I write this, I feel deep disgust, sadness, and anger churning in the pit of my stomach. What had set off these emotions is what I saw: a gang rape scene.

It was on a TV show, so I know that it was just acting, but still, to see such a filthy act was so upsetting. I mean there she was, held down against her will as a group of men just attacked her, laughing with contempt as the victim screamed for help (how could filthy animales enjoy making an innocent person suffer like that so much?) I felt so disturbed at seeing that because even though it was acting, I still wanted to scream, cry, and rescue her. I actually felt the pain she was feeling as they hurt her repeatedly for their pleasure. That scene had brought up so much in my mind: how this sin and sins like this happen every minuto of the day, how just por being an African American woman, I am más prone to being a victim of sexual violence than anyone else (and have actually suffered it a couple times of my life), how someone I amor was raped por her relative (whom she let go simply because he had a sick mother to care for, even though she doesn't know if he's actually caring for her), how so shitty the...
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Fan fiction by poniesaremybffs posted hace más de un año
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begins in their point of view it will have their names.
BELLA
Edward wasn't a school today, too sunny, I'm guessing. The Cullens are probably out hunting. Charlie had dicho that where the Cullens "hike" is filled with bears. I'm pretty sure that they are hunting somewhere else today, so I would like to see how it looks up there. I pulled on some hiking boots and got in my truck.
Eventually I reached the place. I was standing on the side of a small cliff. I found a few oso, oso de prints, and started to wander why I came here in the first place. There was a forest to my left, and it was filled with bushes and trees.
One of the bushes started to shake. Edward stepped out, eyes black as coals, and blood dripping down his mouth. He was staring at me, slowly putting me between him and the cliff.
"Edward, don't!" I was screaming now, fear growing inside me. I started to run, even though I knew there was no chance I could outrun him, not just because he is a vampire, I'm also his singer, meaning that my blood sings to him. I tripped over a rock, and he used vampie speed, took my leg in his cold, hard hand and bit my calf.
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Opinion by kpopeverlasting posted hace más de un año
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Infinite:

link
link
link
link
link
link
link

Block B:

link
link
link
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Article by jeniffer2200 posted hace más de un año
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If tu have 3 quarters, 4 dimes, and 4 pennies, tu have $1.19. tu also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar.

The numbers '172' can be found on the back of the U.S. $5 dollar bill in the bushes at the base of the lincoln Memorial.

President Kennedy was the fastest misceláneo speaker in the world with upwards of 350 words per minute.

In the average lifetime, a person will walk the equivalent of 5 times around the equator.

Odontophobia is the fear of teeth.

The 57 on Heinz ketchup bottles represents the number of varieties of pickles the company once had.

In the early days of the telephone, operators would pick up a call and use the phrase, "Well, are tu there?". It wasn't until 1895 that someone suggested answering the phone with the phrase "number please?"

The surface area of an average-sized brick is 79 cm squared.

According to suicide statistics, Monday is the favored día for self-destruction.
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List by SymmaGirl2 posted hace más de un año
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Just a couple of song titles. I'll add "in my pants" to the end of each one to keep it interesting! XD Here goes~!
Cool Edition...in my pants.
Just Dance...in my pants.
Mr. Wonderful...in my pants.
Alcohol...in my pants.
Let's Boil Hot Water...in my pants.
Firetruck...in my pants.
Thriller...in my pants.
I Like Hamburgers...in my pants.
Go google It...in my pants.
Ten Faced...in my pants.
Parallel Days...in my pants.
Little batería, baterista Boy...in my pants.
Secret Princes...in my pants.
Moonlit Marionette...in my pants.
Meltdown...in my pants.
Prison...in my pants.
Labyrinth Butterfly...in my pants.
Beside Me...in my pants.
New Future...in my pants.
Eternal Snow...in my pants.
Myself...in my pants.
Reflection...in my pants.
Be Our Guest...in my pants.
Baby...in my pants.
Outer Space...in my pants.
Just Like Magic...in my pants.
Wa Wa Wa World...in my pants.
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Opinion by spongefan612 posted hace más de un año
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A detailed smiley face
Here are some things I want to talk about. It's sort of like a diary, but one that people can read because other people may have gone through these things too. I may sware, but that is because I'm trying to make a F***ing point.

First of all, I'm overweight and whatever I do it looks stupid because I'm fat. I mean, when I'm happy, I expect that I look like an idiot in whatever motions I make. My life is a youtube Poop with 100,000,000, views. It's annoying to think that I can never look cool when doing something. Also, it seems like these days EVERY girl I see is skinny (not anorexic) but skinny and compared to them, I'm an elephant.

segundo of all, whenever I get upset, people tell me that I cry over small things and that I should take some deep breaths. Blah Blah Blah, I know that; and taking a deep breath never works. So **** taking deep breaths and making a fool of myself again.

Now I know tu think that this should be in a diary, but I hate diaries. I would never write in them. I would just draw in them as if they were a drawing pad. I also realized those two sware words I dicho weren't natural so I might only have that when completely...
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Opinion by someone_save_me posted hace más de un año
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tu know what I hate? When tu hold the door open for some misceláneo fucker you've never even met in your life and they just walk on por without saying thank tu o even acknowledging your god damn presence. Why this irks me so much I dunno. But it just does.

It's kinda like, well, this is what I always wanna say to them but don't:

Um, excuse me, who the hell do tu think tu are? Do tu not see me opening this door for you, wasting segundos of my life for some misceláneo dude I've never ever met? It's not gonna kill tu to say thanks, it's not gonna shorten your life por even a jiffy and yes that's an actual unit of time. tu won't even have to pause in your walking. tu know what bitch, tu DON'T EVEN HAVE TO SAY THANK YOU! All tu have to do is just do that little nod thing to say "Eh dude, I realize you're there man." But you're too much of a snobby bastard/bastardette to do even that?!?! What the fuck?! Ugh, tu dumb Canterlot ponies.... /shot
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List by bizeshnakarki posted hace más de un año
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I found this on the internet.

1.    Smile
2.    Laugh
3.    Run your fingers through your hair
4.    Touch them gently on the arm/shoulder
5.    Give them a hug
6.    Tease them
7.    Complement their clothes
8.    Say, "It seems like forever since I last saw you"
9.    Whisper
10.    Offer them a blanket o capa if it's cold
11.    Offer to buy them a drink
12.    Lean toward them
13.    Be Positive
14.    Wiink
15.    Send them a text message
16.    Find them on Myspace o facebook and add them
17.    Drop something and see if they pick it up
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List by bizeshnakarki posted hace más de un año
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I found this articulo on the internet.

1. Insist that tu are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate eats meat. Then leave "Slim Jim" wrappers on the floor and lie on the cama holding your stomach every time your roommate walks in. If he/she asks about the wrappers, say tu know nothing about them.
2. Get some hair. Disperse it around your roommate's head while he/she is asleep. Keep a pair of scissors por your bed. Snicker at your roommate every morning.
3. Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as tu can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't tu be going now?"
4. Trash the room when your roommate's not around. Then leave and wait for him/her to come home.then act surprised. Say, "Uh-oh, it looks like, they, were here again."
5. Every time tu see your roommate yell, "You jerk" and kick him/her in the stomach. Then immediately buy him/her some ice cream.
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Opinion by itchygum posted hace más de un año
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I dare u to... go on a diet for the sake of mankind... shut up... get a life... attempt to define the word "word"... give me 20 bucks intrest free... save a brother... put a fork in it... liive to be 40,567... have a panic attack in mcdonalds while ordering a a mcdouble... fall down some stairs... share that pack of pretzels ur crunching on rite now... tell a Catholic priest happy Hanukkah... donate ur mouth to some who will use it less often... comentario on this articulo if it made u laugh... fan this articulo if it.made u laugh and if u see any typos (yep, that's gonna make some fans)... and fan me if I made tu laugh

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Opinion by XxEmolovexX posted hace más de un año
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My segundo hetalia articulo since all of tu who comentó on my other one inspired me to keep writing. I hope tu like~


1. Say "aru" after everything.

2. Instead of saying yes say "da"

3. ONLY talk about how awesome tu are

4. Run up to misceláneo people and insist they marry tu in a creepy way

5. Take everything in a perverted way and be all like "Ohonhonhon~"

6. Laugh like america at everything not funny , then when theres something funny dont laugh.

7. Whenever someone annoys you, look at them with a creepy smile and be like KOLKOLKOL

8. Act and talk like poland, then at a misceláneo time switch to actuación like another character

9. Run around demanding to be recognized as a country.

10. at misceláneo inappropriate times sing " MARUKAITE CHIKYUU MARUKAITE CHIKYUU MARUKAITE CHIKYUU BOKU HETALIA! "

11. When someone walks up to tu o touches tu scream " DONT HURT ME IM A VIRGIN! VIRGINS ARE NO FUN TO KILL!!! "
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Opinion by XxEmolovexX posted hace más de un año
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This took me a while to make, but anywys...these are comebacks i could think of that might work pretty well, Enjoy~

1. Tell them they're just gelatina, jalea because prussia is awesomer than them

2. Slowly look up at them with russia's sadistic grin and say in a creepy voice "You will become one with me"

3. Give them a creepy france smile

4. Call them a bloody wanker in a terrible british accent.

5. Shout at them saying they're just gelatina, jalea because you're the hero.

6. Call them a tomate bastard

7. Give them a creepy smile and jump up and down while yelling " marry me marry me marry me "

8. Smile darkly and just say kolkolkol

9. Threaten to hit them with your frying pan. HARD.

10. Tell them to go express their utter disgust and anger through the piano.

11. Tell them they're so weak ITALY could beat them in a fight.

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Opinion by adaug posted hace más de un año
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4 days after Sam and her mom talked,this happened.
Sam just got inicial when,she opened the front door."Sam!Hurry!Go in your bedroom!Hurry!"Mom ran to Sam,and grabbed her arm."Mom!Whats happening?"Sam stopped to ask."There's someone coming."Mom whispered."What?"Sam whispered back.Mom couldn't say any more,She grabbed Sam and ran into her bedroom,There Sam saw her little sister,Nicky."Duck Sam!Now!!!"Mom demanded.Sam ducked as Nicky did."Mom?Whats happening!"Sam dicho shaking."I-I can't explain!No time!!Duck lower!"Mom said.Just then...POW!!!There was glass shattering.Nicky Screaming.Mom quieting her down.Sam,Scared to death.Just then.Sam couldn't hear anything but the word "Joan" circling in her head.Joan.Joan.Joan.Joan...is...G-G-GONE.Gone.Sam couldn't help but screaming.Then...all Sam could remember was waking up in the hospital."Mom?Nicky?What...What happened?"Sam asked."You were...s-s-stabbed."Mom stuttered."WHAT!!???"Sam dicho shaking.But she stopped when she remembered Joan.
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