misceláneo Club
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1. At the movies: When tu meet acquaintances/ friends.. .
Stupid Question:-
Hey, what are tu doing here?
Answer:-
Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet…
Stupid Question:-
Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-
No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia.. …why don’t tu try again.

3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask…
Stupid Question:-
Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-
Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When tu ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-
Is ! the “Butter Paneer Masala” dish good??
Answer:-
No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occassionaly also spit in it.

5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets tu after years…
Stupid Question:-
Munna, Chickoo, you’ve become so big.
Answer:-
Well tu haven’t particularly s hr unk yourself.

6. When a friend announces her wedding, and tu ask…
Stupid Question:-
Is the guy you’re marrying good?
Answer:-
No,he’s a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout….it’s just the money.

7. When tu get woken up at midnight por a phone call…
Stupid Question:-
Sorry. were tu sleeping?
Answer:-
No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry o not. tu thought I was sleeping…. tu dumb witted moron.

8. When tu see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair…
Stupid Question:-
hola have tu had a haircut?
Answer:-
No, its autumn and I’m shedding…. …

9. At the dentist when he’s sticking pointed objects in your mouth…
Stupid Question:-
Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:-
No it wont. It will just bleed.

10.. tu are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks…
Stupid Question:-
Oh, so tu smoke.
Answer:-
Gosh, it’s a miracle …….it was a piece of chalk and now it’s in flames!!!
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funny
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WatchMojo
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Source: google
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10 Question: If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first?
Answer: The brunette - the blonde would have to stop for directions!


9 The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces o twelve.

"Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"


8 A blonde was walking down the road with a healthy looking pig under her arm. As she passed the bus stop, someone asked,

"Where did tu get that?"

The pig replied,

"I won her in a raffle!"


7 A person went into the office cocina one morning and found a new blonde girl painting...
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44 Ways to Make a Girl Happy

Ladies, this will make tu tear up :)

Fellas, read all of it:)

1-Touch her waist.

2-Talk to her.

3-Share secrets.

4-Give her your jacket.

5-Kiss her slowly.

Are tu remembering this?

6-Hug her.

7-Hold her.

8-Laugh with her.

9-Invite her somewhere.

10-Let her be with tu when you're with your friends.

Keep reading...

11-Smile with her.

12-Take pics with her.

13-Pull her onto your lap.

14-When she says she loves tu more, deny it. fight back.

15-When her friends say i amor her más than you, deny it; fight back and hug her tight so she can't get...
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I'm a girl pervert!I say guys are crazy cuz they think I touch their butts!I blame it on their hormones even though I touched their butts alot!

1.Be a real pervert

2.You don't have to look like one but just act like one

3.Always when you're walking behind a guy always look at their butt!And say"say veiw" then touch it nice and gently! :)

4.They look back and ask tu say'what?no way especially not your flat ass!!!!"when they turn around find another butt to look at!

5.Look at their muscles when they're wearing camisa, camiseta sleeve shirts and they're doing heavy lifting

6.Take pictures as well

7.Always comment...
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added by Rodz
Source: desktopnexus
added by Rodz
Source: desktopnexus