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 Soviet Russia Jokes!
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added by Twilight_Dream
added by Jeffersonian
added by Jeffersonian
added by edwardcarlisle
Source: blogspot
added by xxXsk8trXxx
Source: youtube
added by zanhar1
added by DoctorSpud
Source: Me
posted by Flora_Swift
#=Recommended
~=Really Lame


1.    It’s hard to be discouraged when every path we explore leads nowhere. #

2.    Love is like a perfume. tu can’t pour it on someone else without getting a few drops on yourself.

3.    Even the smallest person can change the course of the future. #

4.    Live each día like it was your last. The past is gone and tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.

5.    Follow your passion and success will follow you.

6.    Where there’s life, there’s hope. #

7.    In...
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posted by SeeUV3
 Phil
Phil
Phan – fiction : hola this is my first “phan”-fiction and I will first warn tu if tu do not like gay/bi people LEAVE NOW AND DON’T READ. Also Dan and Phil are NOT really together (but they did say they were both bi) this is just a simple fan-fiction and if tu want más chapters of it I will gladly make one más (suggestions wanted). Sorry if this is mildly o severely creepy. ENJOY (I hope).
Chapter 1: Feelings

It was a cool autumn día in Manchester when Dan and Phil decided they would mover from Manchester to London. “Phil” cried Dan. “Its 12:00pm get up sleepy head!” Phil...
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Credit: link

How do tu know people don't like your friend? Oh, I don't know, how about the fact that...

1. Your mom can never remember your friend's name. She even guesses. "Oh, is your friend... uh... Tasha coming over?" Your friend's name is not Tasha. It's Kate.

2. Your Dad always seems to disappear when Kate comes over. "Well, I should go paint the garaje door now." "Now?" "Yep, no time to waste. Just have to pick up a Kate of paint... I mean, a can of paint from the store."

3. Your little brother rolls his eyes at her name. "Kate's coming over? Does she have to?"

4. Your mom defends Kate to...
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1. It’s OK to kill people.

2. Dying doesn’t really matter much either.


3. If you’re 14, have hair covering your eyes and live in a small village, man up, because you’re going to have to save the world.

4. Medicine became obsolete in the año 2004, when doctors noticed that hiding behind a muro caused human health to regenerate to 100%.

5. Eating stuff found on the floor is good for tu – your parents were wrong.


6. Sometime in the future, Earth will be menaced por hordes of alien spacecraft that fly in predictable patterns and can be killed in one hit. The logical course of action will...
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posted by ShiningsTar542
Here are some pretty amazing facts that tu probably didn't know:

Originally, Coca-Cola was green. It was an herbal medicine used for dizziness and stomach pain.

It is impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

The height of the pyramid of Cheops is equal to one millionth of the distance separating the Earth from the Sun....

Why do we say OK? In the Civil War, when troops returned to camp after a battle, they carried a banner with the number of dead written on it. No dead = 0K (an English acronym for "0 Killed". Hence, OK to say that 'all is well'.

The youngest pope in history was only 11.

Chimpanzees and dolphins are the only animales capable of recognizing themselves in a mirror.

Pretty amazing right? What other facts could tu add?
posted by karpach_13
JUST IN CASE YOUR BORED


1. Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they don't realize it.
2. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minuto intervals throughout the day.
3. Make a trail of naranja jugo, jugo de on the floor, leading to the restrooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in house wares," and see what happens.
5. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10."
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
7. Put M&M's on layaway.
8. mover "Caution: Wet...
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posted by karpach_13
Things to do in a movie theater
1. Inform the entire theatre that tu have to go to the bathroom. Wait a minuto o so and tell everyone that tu feel better now.

2. Applaud.

3. Laugh loudly during serious and sad scenes.

4. Sing along with the backround music.

5. Whenever someone opens a door yell "Don't go in there, he's got a gun!"

6. Snore.

7. Yell "Hey, down in front!" even if tu are sitting in the front.

8. Make shadow puppets.

9. If you've seen the movie before, say what's going to happen right before it happens. Act amazed at your wonderful foresight.

10. Walk around behind the screen....
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posted by awesomebrowny
There was a VERY picky family and they got on EVERYBODY'S nerves. One día brother Billy saw sister Lily's gofres just...sitting there.So while she and brother Bob were talking to their mom fighting about who estola brother Joe's gofres the other day, so Billy decided to take Lilly's gofres and run. Billy ran as fast as he could into his room shut the door and started to eat the waffles.Billy's dad came in and asked what he was doing...as soon as he saw the gofres he closed the door and dicho "u know u should really try not 2 make a big commotion while stealing waffles,but then again gimmie...
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added by TheFunnyChick95
added by Lizijana
added by 27-5
added by 050801090907