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posted by karpach_13
New ways to order pizza
Are tu tired of always ordering pizza the same way? Well, this lists will keep tu entertained for over 90 pizza orders!!!

1. Order two toppings, then say, "No, they'll start fighting."

2. Learn to properly pronounce the ingredients of a Twinkie. Ask that these be included in the pizza.

3. Use CB lingo where applicable.

4. Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.

5. Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."

6. Tell the order taker a rival pizza place is on the other line and you're going with the lowest bidder.

7. Give them your address, exclaim "Oh, just surprise me!" and hang up.

8. Answer their preguntas with questions.

9. In your breathiest voice, tell them to cut the crap about nutrition and ask if they have something outlandishly sinful.

10. Use these bonus words in the conversation: ROBUST FREE-SPIRITED COST-EFFICIENT UKRAINIAN PUCE.

11. Tell them to put the crust on parte superior, arriba this time.

12. Sing the order to the tune of camioneta, van Morrison's "Brown-Eyed Girl."

13. Do not name the toppings tu want. Rather, spell them out.

14. Put an extra edge in your voice when tu say "crazy bread."

15. Stutter on the letter "p."

16. Ask for a deal available somewhere else. (e.g. If phoning Domino's, ask for a P'zone)

17. Ask what the order taker is wearing.

18. Crack your knuckles into the receiver.

19. Say hello, act stunned for five seconds, then behave as if they called you.

20. Rattle off your order with a determined air. If they ask if tu would like drinks with that, panic and become disoriented.

21. Tell the order taker you're depressed. Get him/her to cheer tu up.

22. Make a lista of exotic cuisines. Order them as toppings.

23. Change your accent every three seconds.

24. Order 52 pepperoni slices prepared in a fractal pattern as follows from an equation tu are about to dictate. Ask if they need paper.

25. Act like tu know the order taker from somewhere. Say "Bed-Wetters' Camp, right?"

26. Start your order with "I'd like. . . ". A little later, slap yourself and say "No, I don't."

27. If they repeat the order to make sure they have it right, say "OK. That'll be $10.99; please pull up to the first window."

28. Rent a pizza.

29. Order while using an electric cuchillo sharpener.

30. Ask if tu get to keep the pizza box. When they say yes, heave a sigh of relief.

31. Put the accent on the last syllable of "pepperoni." Use the long "i" sound.

32. Have your pizza "shaken, not stirred."

33. Say "Are tu sure this is (Pizza Place)? When they say yes, say "Well, so is this! You've got some explaining to do!" When they finally offer proof that it is, in fact, (Pizza Place), start to cry and ask, "Do tu know what it's like to be lied to?"

34. mover the mouthpiece farther and farther from your lips as tu speak. When the call ends, jerk the mouthpiece back into place and scream goodbye at the parte superior, arriba of your lungs.

35. Tell them to double-check to make sure your pizza is, in fact, dead.

36. Imitate the order taker's voice.

37. Eliminate verbs from your speech.

38. When they say "What would tu like?" say, "Huh? Oh, tu mean now."

39. Play a sitar in the background.

40. Say it's your anniversary and you'd appreciate if the deliverer hid behind some furniture waiting for your spouse to arrive so tu can surprise him/her.

41. Amuse the order taker with little-known facts about country music.

42. Ask to see a menu.

43. Quote Carl Sandberg.

44. Say you'll be able to pay for this when the movie people call back.

45. Ask if they have any idea what is at stake with this pizza.

46. Ask what topping goes best with well-aged Chardonnay.

47. Belch directly into the mouthpiece; then tell your dog it should be ashamed.

48. Order a slice, not a whole pizza.

49. Shout "I'm through with men/women! Send me a dozen of your best, Gaston!"

50. Doze off in the middle of the order, catch yourself, and say "Where was I? Who are you?"

51. Psychoanalyze the order taker.

52. Ask what their phone number is. Hang up, call them, and ask again.

53. If using a touch-tone, press misceláneo numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.

54. Make up a charge-card name. Ask if they accept it.

55. Call to complain about service. Later, call to say tu were drunk and didn't mean it.

56. Tell the order taker to tell the manager to tell his supervisor he's fired.

57. reportar a petty theft to the order taker.

58. Use expletives like "Great Caesar's Ghost" and "Holy pizza toppings, Batman!"

59. Ask for the guy who took your order last time.

60. If he/she suggests anything, adamantly declare, "I shall not be swayed por your sweet words."

61. Wonder aloud if tu should trim those nose hairs.

62. Try to talk while drinking something.

63. Start the conversation with "My Call to (Pizza Place), Take 1, and. . . action!"

64. Ask if the pizza is organically grown.

65. Ask about pizza maintenance and repair.

66. Be vague in your order.

67. When they repeat your order, say "Again, with a little más OOMPH this time."

68. If using a touch-tone press 9-1-1 every 5 segundos throughout the order.

69. After ordering, say "I wonder what THIS button on the phone does." Simulate a cutoff.

70. Start the conversation por reciting today's fecha and saying, "This may be my last entry."

71. State your order and say that's as far as this relationship is going to get.

72. Ask if they're familiar with the term "spanking a pizza." Make up a descripción to go with the term. Ask that this be done to your pizza.

73. Say "Kssssssssssssssht" rather loudly into the phone. Ask if they felt that.

74. Detect the order taker's psychic aura. Use it to your advantage.

75. When listing toppings tu want on your pizza, include another pizza.

76. Learn to play a blues riff on the harmonica. Stop talking at regular intervals to play it.

77. Ask if they would like to sample your pizza. Suggest an even trade.

78. Perfect a celebrity's voice. Stress that tu won't take any crap from some two-bit can't-hack-it pimple-faced gofer.

79. Put them on hold.

80. Teach the order taker a scret code. Use the code on all subsequent orders.

81. Mumble, "There's a bomb under your seat." When asked to repeat that, say "I dicho 'sauce smothered with meat'."

82. Make the first topping tu order mushrooms. Make the last thing tu say "No mushrooms, please." Hang up before they have a chance to respond.

83. When the order is repeated, change it slightly. When it is repeated again, change it again. On the third time, say "You just don't get it, do you?"

84. When you'ge dado the price, say "Ooooooo, that sounds complicated. I hate math."

85. Haggle.

86. Order a one-inch pizza.

87. Order term life insurance.

88. When they say "Will that be all?" snicker and say "We'll find out, won't we?"

89. Order with a Speak-n-Spell where applicable.

90. Ask how many dolphins were killed to make that pizza.

91. While on the phone, fake entering puberty. Fluctuate pitch often; act embarrassed.

92. Engage in some serious swapping.

93. Dance all around the word "pizza." Avoid saying it at all costs. If he/she says it, say "Please don't mention that word."

94. Have a movie with a good car chase scene playing loudly in the background. Yell "OW!" when a bullet is fired.

95. If he/she suggests a side order, ask why he/she is punishing you.

96. Ask if the pizza has had its shots.

97. Order a steamed pizza.

98. Get taker's name. Later, call exactly on the hora to say, "This is your (time of day) wake-up call, So-and-so." Hang up.

99. Offer to pay for the pizza with a public flogging.
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Source: Sweet fotografía fan art por me - KanonKyu
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posted by BellaCullen96
Organize a bunch of people in one class to emit a low humming noise, keeping straight faces.
Organize a whole bunch of people to fall off their chairs at the same time.
Organize a whole bunch of people to drop their pencils/pens at a preset time.
Superglue quarters to the floor, count how many people try to pick them up.
Write fake amor notes and slip them into people's lockers
If someone near tu falls asleep in class, tie their shoelaces to the desk/chair.
Lay a paper towel roll on the floor at the parte superior, arriba of the steps and give it a kick, making sure you've taped the loose end to the floor already....
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posted by Lady10358
Found this on google
1. If you're lucky enough and find someone with the shirt: FREE HUGS o If tu find a camisa, camiseta store selling it, hug the shirt/person and if they/someone notices you, say "It says free hugs!"
2. go to the comida court and go to a fast comida place and take tons of straws and put as many possible in your mouth and stand on a mesa, tabla canto elmo's world theme.
3. Go to one of those toddler toy/clothing stores and hold up a baby outfit/toy and yell as loud as tu can "I amor THIS TOY! I'D PLAY WITH IT día AND NIGHT!"
4. Go to the bathroom and hide in a stall until tu see an old lady/guy...
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(WARNING: There is tons of cussing in this articulo to emphasize my hatred for this song a bit more. If that bothers you, please leave now.)

Train, tu did it. tu FREAKING DID IT. After watching Drive By, I didn’t think it was POSSIBLE for ANYBODY to make a worse song than that.

Except maybe Ryan.

Seriously though, this song isn’t just bad. It’s nowhere near bad. To call it a terrible piece of shit would be complimenting it. I can’t describe the rage I feel for this song at all. And if I were to shred every particle of my brain molecules, destroying my memory in the process, just to get...
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posted by Bluekait
There are certain rules of survival in horror movies. The movie Scream had some rules, but they weren’t very useful. Our rules are much better and teach tu exactly how to survive a horror movie.

Don’t walk around saying “Hello?” like the killer is going to reply “Yeah I’m in the kitchen. Want a sandwich?”

If someone says “Oh yeah, that’s the house where Old Man Jenkins was murdered” then it’s time to mover house.

If your friend gets bitten por a zombie and says “Maybe I wont turn into one”, kill him. Better seguro than sorry.

Upstairs? Bad idea. Outside? Don’t go there....
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posted by tokidoki123
[The Simpsons] 1F02 - Homer Goes To College #255
Homer: I've been working on a plan. During the exam, I'll hide under some coats, and hope that somehow everything will work out.
Contributed por funnytvquotes.com



[The Simpsons] 1F05 - Bart's Inner Child #32
Skinner: Damn...they're very slowly getting away!
Moe: They're heading for the old mill!
Homer: No we're not.
Moe: Well, let's go to the old mill anyway -- get some cider!
Contributed por funnytvquotes.com



[The Simpsons] 1F06 - Boy Scoutz 'N the capucha, campana #86
Homer: Marge, don't discourage the boy. Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what...
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1) Pay the ring bearer a dollar to pick his/her nose during the ceremony.

2) Laugh hysterically the whole time while the vows are being said.

3) Pay the flor girl a dollar to heap the petals on the floor, and walk in front of the bride with the basket on her head.

4) Play a heavy metal song in your portable CD player during the procession. Make sure tu disabled the piano/organ first.

5) Walk around, handing other guests copies of embarrassing pictures of your cousin, who is the one getting married.

6) Get your best friend to call tu repeatedly during the ceremony. Make sure tu set your ringtone to an irritating tone.

7) Paint yourself purple for the occasion.

8) "Trip" and spill chocolate fondue all over the bride.

9) Put a "kick me, I'm making a stupid mover por getting married" sign on the groom's back.

10) "Invite" a pit bull.
 The Mew pudín, con leche goes "Na no da"
The Mew Pudding goes "Na no da"
20. pudín, con leche Fon "Tokyo mew mew" The cuties character in the anime she's hyper, active and has the best amor interest despite not being the main character and only eight years old.

19.Hiei from "Yu Yu Hakusho" Hiei has the darkest life. He was thrown off a cliff as a child, torn from his family, lost the only thing he had of them and then his sister was captured por the UGLIEST of all fat greedy bastards. No not the one from Disney's "Pocahontas".
 A sucky life gave him an attitude everyone loves
A sucky life gave him an attitude everyone loves

18.Snow White from "Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs" The most innocent of the disney princess naive,...
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