37 Rude & Crude Pick-up Lines
1. I wish tu were a door so I could slam tu all day.
2. Nice legs...what time do they open?
3. Do tu work for UPS? I thought I saw tu checking out my package.
4. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?
5. Can I buy tu a drink o do tu just want the money?
6. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
7. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted cama Thrasher: have tu seen one?
8. I'm fighting the urge to make tu the happiest woman on earth tonight.
9. Want to play army? I'll lay down and tu can blow the hell outta me.
10. I wish tu were a poni, pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride tu all día long for a quarter.
11. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
12. I'd really like to see how tu look when I'm naked.
13. Is that a ladder in your stockings o the stairway to heaven?
14. tu might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
15. Are those real?
16. tu must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.
17. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing tu do with your tongue.
18. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be tu por morning.
19. (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.
20. tu know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
21. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?
22. F@# me if I'm wrong, but is your name jerez Titsbottom?
23. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
24. My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.
25. Do tu believe in amor at first sight o should I walk por again?
26. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone dicho tu were looking for me.
27. My friend wants to know if tu think I'M cute.
28. Hi. The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
29. My name isn't Elmo, but tu can tickle me anytime tu want to.
30. I know leche does a body good, but DAMN, how much have tu been drinking?
31. If tu were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.
32. Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why? Don't tu like pizza?
33. Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go inicial without me.
34. Do tu sleep on your stomach? Can I???
35. Do tu wash your pants in Windex? Because I can see myself in them.
36. I lost my puppy. Can tu help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
37. (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get tu out of these wet clothes.
1. I wish tu were a door so I could slam tu all day.
2. Nice legs...what time do they open?
3. Do tu work for UPS? I thought I saw tu checking out my package.
4. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?
5. Can I buy tu a drink o do tu just want the money?
6. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
7. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted cama Thrasher: have tu seen one?
8. I'm fighting the urge to make tu the happiest woman on earth tonight.
9. Want to play army? I'll lay down and tu can blow the hell outta me.
10. I wish tu were a poni, pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride tu all día long for a quarter.
11. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
12. I'd really like to see how tu look when I'm naked.
13. Is that a ladder in your stockings o the stairway to heaven?
14. tu might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
15. Are those real?
16. tu must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.
17. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing tu do with your tongue.
18. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be tu por morning.
19. (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.
20. tu know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
21. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?
22. F@# me if I'm wrong, but is your name jerez Titsbottom?
23. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
24. My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.
25. Do tu believe in amor at first sight o should I walk por again?
26. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone dicho tu were looking for me.
27. My friend wants to know if tu think I'M cute.
28. Hi. The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
29. My name isn't Elmo, but tu can tickle me anytime tu want to.
30. I know leche does a body good, but DAMN, how much have tu been drinking?
31. If tu were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.
32. Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why? Don't tu like pizza?
33. Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go inicial without me.
34. Do tu sleep on your stomach? Can I???
35. Do tu wash your pants in Windex? Because I can see myself in them.
36. I lost my puppy. Can tu help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
37. (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get tu out of these wet clothes.
BTW, this isn't mine. It was originally written por XxEmolovexX. Copied word for word.
Dad comes inicial drunk and mad.
He pulls out a gun.
And shoots his wife then turns the gun on himself.
The little girl sits behind the couch, crying.
The police came and took the little girl to an orphanage.
She walks into the bedroom, and there is a picture of jesús on the cross.
Girl: How did that man get off that?
Teacher: He didn't
Girl: Yes he did!
Teacher: No he didn't
Girl: Yes he did! He always sat siguiente to me when my parents fought, and he told me everything would be okay.
Post this as 'Jesus story' (any place)?
Don't ignore this.
64 percent of tu won't re-post this.
tu never know who might be watching. Remember: the Bible says If tu deny jesús in front of your friends, He will deny tu in front of his Father.
Dad comes inicial drunk and mad.
He pulls out a gun.
And shoots his wife then turns the gun on himself.
The little girl sits behind the couch, crying.
The police came and took the little girl to an orphanage.
She walks into the bedroom, and there is a picture of jesús on the cross.
Girl: How did that man get off that?
Teacher: He didn't
Girl: Yes he did!
Teacher: No he didn't
Girl: Yes he did! He always sat siguiente to me when my parents fought, and he told me everything would be okay.
Post this as 'Jesus story' (any place)?
Don't ignore this.
64 percent of tu won't re-post this.
tu never know who might be watching. Remember: the Bible says If tu deny jesús in front of your friends, He will deny tu in front of his Father.
This world will fall under the hands of evil, darkness and shadows shall destroy this world.....the ultimate power of the darkness shall prevail. All of my enemies shall be destroyed por this darkness...Only the worthy people will survive. All of the not worthy people shall be enslaved por the twisted turns of the darkness. animales will be turned más scarier...some humans will become frightful......and I shall have the ultimate power!, let fuego and ice come alive along with darkness.....dragons shall rise and inhabit this planet....The skies will turn black and red and the ground will turn to metal.......robot unicornios will dance...the dance of....evil...Heavy Metal will come alive and there will be peace among every awesome human on this Earth....come and registrarse me as I take over this silly little planet....everyone will bow down to me and only me,.....I SHALL TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!!, mwhahahaha >:)