Tom Foolery With A Bit Of Salt Part 2 - My Little poni, pony - La Magia de la Amistad - fanpop

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Tom waited for the crowd to stop laughing. Once they did, he proceeded with his siguiente joke.

Tom: Does the time bother you?
Crowd: *Chuckles*
Tom: I get bothered por the time. Not so much the time itself, but other ponies bother me. For the time.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: tu get this old mare that asks what time is it? What time is it?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: As if, tu yourself were responsible for keeping time.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: I mean I feel honored that they think I'm the one in charge, but tu must understand tu don't see official time keeper here, do you?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Here's another way they'll ask you. *Speaks in a British accent* Do tu have the time?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Well no. I don't believe I do. I certainly didn't have it on me this morning.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: tu know, I think the Navy has it.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Yeah, they keep it right up there in observatory. They let a little of it out here and there.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Not too much though. They don't want us using it too much. Just enough.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Time. They'll also ask do tu know what time it is? Then I say, yes.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: I wouldn't want to disappoint them. There's no time, we made it up. tu don't see any numbers in the sky, do you?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: When the hell is it? We often know where we are, but we really don't know when we are. All the time zones are different. Every calendar is different. These calendars tell tu what día of the año it is, but a few countries have different types of calendars. Chinese celebrate the New año in February while we celebrate ours in January.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Chinese are also up in the 7000's along with the Hebrews, and we're stuck 5000 years in the past.
Crowd: *Clapping, and cheering*
Tom: How did they do that?!
Crowd: *Cheering, and clapping*
Tom: We don't know when it is, it could be the middle of last mes for all we know. Yet we have it down so perfect, that every 4 years we have to stick in an extra day. They call it February 29.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Bullshit it's March 1st and I know it.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: It just feels like March 1st. What's the sense of keeping track of time? I'll give tu an example. There's a moment coming. It's not there yet.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: It's almost there.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And it's gone!
Crowd: *Clapping*
Tom: There's no now. There's no now. Everything is the near future, o the reciente past. There is no present, welcome to the present. *Whistles while looking to his left* Gone again.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: It's so imprecise. We don't even care to use the minutes, and segundos we've been given. What time tu got?
Crowd: *Chuckling*
Tom: I got uh. *Looks at his right wrist* I got just after.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Just after? Shit I must be slow, I had going on.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Where did that imprecision come from? I remember they taught it to me in school when they were helping me tell time, but of course tu can't tell time, time tells you.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: But they were trying. Now the big hoof, but I don't have a big hoof.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Never mind. Look at the clock! And the clock is wonderful, there's so much emotion to a clock. I hate digital clocks!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Digital clocks rob me of the emotion attached to the spatial relation of the clock face. Don't tu feel that the 1st half hora goes por quicker when it goes down all the way to 30?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Where as the 2nd half hour, you're fighting against gravity trying to get back to 0!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Holy christ, it's a long climb! I'll tell you, if I had a half hora to live, I want it to be this one. *Raising his left leg impersonating the clock* Instead of the one where it goes. *Lowers his arm back towards the ground*
Crowd: *Laughing, and clapping*
Tom: It can be very vague with the way we say certain things, like now. Now is an interesting one. tu want that now?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Yes. Well, would tu like to try again?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: o sometimes, just now. Did tu hear that? What?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Just now. tu must have meant just then.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Yeah, just then, but there it is now.
Crowd: *Whistling, and clapping*
Tom: Pardon me, do tu have the time? When, now, o when tu asked me?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: This shit is moving Flitter.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: There's a few others, right away, immediately, just like that, lickety split, at the tip of a hat, and no time at all. As quick as tu can say Big Macintosh! I'm sure some of tu have dicho that.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Or, I'll be back before tu can say Big Macintosh. Big Macintosh, haha, you're not back.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: How about a jiffy? *Jumps around the stage* A jiffy! *Looks at the crowd behind him* o a flash.
Crowd: *Chuckling*
Tom: Which one is faster, a jiffy o a flash? I think there are two flashes in a jiffy myself.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: But nopony knows how many jiffy's there are in two shakes of a lamb's tale. But why are there two shakes of a lamb's tale? What happened to the basic unit of measurement? One shake of a lamb's tale!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: We can all do our own arithmetic thank you.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Belched a little there.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Then we have words like soon. That's a very emotional one, a lot of potential for drama. *Frowning* Soon!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Soon?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: *Looks down at the ground* Is your mother coming home? *Looks up at the lights on the ceiling* Uh-huh.
Crowd: *Chuckling*
Tom: *Looks down at the ground* When? *Looks up at the lights on the ceiling* Soon. Real soon.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: *Looks at the audience* As soon as she can. Sooner than tu think.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: That sounds a little scary. Sooner than I think? That's almost like before tu know it. I'll be back before tu know it!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: He did it, holy christ!
Crowd: *Cheering, whistling, and clapping*
Tom: Then there's a few others like one of these days. Before long. Any time now. Well that's true. Everything will happen any time now.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: As well as any día now. That one sounds kind of arrogant. hola Ben I'll give tu back those 5 bucks tu gave me. Yeah, any día now.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Sooner o later, now and then, once in a while, from time to time. In a little while. I think that one's cheerful don't you?
Crowd: *Chuckling*
Tom: It'll be just a little while. o it will take....a short time.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: That sounds almost terminal doesn't it? tu only have, a short time. Where as tu have, a little while.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Boy I would amor to have a little while instead of a short time.
Crowd: *Chuckling*
Tom: Then we have long ways of measuring time, like Kingdom Come. *Talks in a Southern accent* I'm gonna stand here til' Kingdom Come.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Well I don't have that on my watch. *Looks at his wrist* Doomsday tu say? Until the cows come home. That's an easy one to remember, it's around Dusk. If tu leave them out overnight they burst. Pop!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Here's a long period of time, forever.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Impatient ponies will frequently say, I've been standing in this line FOREVER!!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Look at this Albert. This stallion has been standing in this line. Forever.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: He seems fairly fresh to me.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Almost like an eternity. I've had a few ponies say that to me. It's almost like it's been an eternity. As if they had experience.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Then other ponies use real measurements of time, such as 5 minutes. Give me 5 minutos please. Oh are tu kidding me? I can fix that shit in 5 minutes.
Crowd: *Clapping*
Tom: tu can do anything in 5 minutes, even things tu hate. hola let's go talk to Dan. Are tu kidding, Dan's an asshole!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Look, only 5 minutes. Okay, let's get it over with. It is after all for 5 minutes. But not 10. Now we're entering double digits.
Crowd: *Whistling*
Tom: 10 minutes. Now 15 is popular. Almost everypony in Equestria uses that one. It's got a regulatory tone to it. It sounds like something tu have to do when you're at work. Especially when you're on brake.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Man, I like 20 minutes. Doesn't that sound más free than 15?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: 20 minutes. I'll be back in 20 minutes. Shit, what's he going to do?
Crowd: *Laughing*

2 B Continued

The Train Part 10

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Labiche was taken to the hotel so he could get some sleep before driving the train. The hotel was run por a mare named Christine.

This is her picture: link

Schmidt: *Walks into the hotel with Labiche, and rings the bell*
Christine: *Walks to the front desk*
Schmidt: A room for this stallion.
Christine: *Puts out the sign in book with a pen*
Labiche: *Signs his name into the book*
Christine: 60 Francs.
Schmidt: Pay her.
Labiche: tu pay her. I'm a guest of the German army.
Schmidt: He is a railroad pony.
Christine: *Holding the key to his room* 60 francs.
Schmidt: Isn't there a discount for railroad...

The Train Part 9

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Labiche delivered the engine to Rive-Reine.

Labiche: *Stops the engine*
Schmidt: You're late! What happened?
Labiche: We were shot at por a spitfire, a couple of miles back.
Schmidt: Any serious damage?
Didont: Not enough to stop tu from getting to Germaneigh.
Labiche: *Brought his bicycle with him on the train. He takes it with him off the train, and gets ready to ride away*
Colonel Von Waldheim: *Looking at Labiche*
Labiche: Your engine, and your crew.
Colonel Von Waldheim: Was it your idea to risk this engine on the daylight run?
Labiche: Major Herren was following your orders. He told us...

The Train Part 7

posted by Seanthehedgehog

After escaping the air raid, Papa Boule's train stopped at a station called Rive-Reine.

Schmidt: *Runs out of the caboose, and to the engine*
Papa Boule: *Staring at the wheels with his fuego pony*
Schmidt: What is it?! What is it?!!? *Getting closer to the engine* Engineer!! *Stops in front of Papa Boule* What is it?
Papa Boule: The oil line.
Schmidt: Can tu fix it?
Papa Boule: *Shrugs*
Schmidt: Can tu get the engine back to the works?
Papa Boule: Maybe.
Schmidt: *Looks at the station master behind him on the station platform* Where's your phone?
Station Master: *Points to the left*
Schmidt: *Runs...

The Train Part 6

posted by Seanthehedgehog

The armament train Didont drove had arrived at the yards. He stopped the train siguiente to a shed with the word Vaires in white on the roof.

Didont: *Looks at a tower on the right side of his train. Labiche, and another poni, pony are in there with a German officer*
German poni, pony 90: *Walking towards Didont* Uncouple the engine, get it out of here!
Didont: *Signals his fuego poni, pony to go out to uncouple the engine from the train*
Fire Pony: *Gets out to uncouple the engine*

During the mid 40's in France, tu had to stand between the engine, and freight cars to uncouple the engine.

Fire Pony: *Standing between...

The Train Part 2

posted by Seanthehedgehog

When the Colonel arrived at the station in his staff car, escorted por two motorcycles, he was displeased to find out that his train was not there.

Colonel Von Waldheim: *Gets out of the car, and walks to a soldier with a clipboard* What about my train?!
Schmidt: It has been cancelled.
Colonel Von Waldheim: *Turns around to face Schmidt* Who cancelled it?!

Four minutos later in a office.

Labiche: I did.
German poni, pony 87: Labiche Colonel. He is the area inspector. Under my supervision of course.
Colonel Von Waldheim: Since when does a french stallion have the authority to cancelar a German train?
Labiche:...

Grand Theft Ponies 3 Part 4

posted by Seanthehedgehog

May 6, 1995. The día Gordon got out of the hospital.

Sam: *On phone with Case Cracker* Yeah, I'm outside of the hospital right now. He should come out soon.
Case Cracker: Aight man. Don't take too long. Jim wants to see him.
Sam: *Sees Gordon walking out of the hospital* Shouldn't take too long. He's coming out now.
Gordon: *Walking to Sam* Hey.
Sam: hola yourself. How are tu feeling?
Gordon: Good. Let's go see the others.

The pizzeria on Mane Ashbury was crowded, but that didn't stop Gordon and the others from talking about business.

Jim: Gordon, welcome back.
Gordon: Thanks Jim. Guess what...

Grand Theft Ponies 3 Part 3

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Case galleta was driving his car on the highway. He was heading north for Sausalito to get an upgrade for his Flam Tornado when this occurred.

Fillydelphia Ponies: *In a black Pearla, a Capri and a red Amigo*
Fillydelphia poni, pony 75: Three years, and we're still after this son of a bitch.
Case Cracker: *Looks at the three cars behind him*
Fillydelphia poni, pony 53: He's looking at us.
Fillydelphia poni, pony 47: But he's not doing anything.
Fillydelphia poni, pony 53: Shoot him.
Fillydelphia poni, pony 47: *Leans out of the car with his assault rifle and fires six bullets*
Case Cracker: *Floors it*
Fillydelphia Ponies:...

Ponies On The Rails: Season 10 Highlights

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Theme song >>>> link

Taxi Ponies: *Driving taxi cabs to the station*

Ponies On The Rails

Starring the Union Pacific ponies

Pierce Hawkins "Hawkeye" From SeanTheHedgehog

Snowflake & Orion From Alinah09

Metal Gloss From DragonAura15

Railway Pony: *Driving freight train across a bridge going over the train tracks at the station.*
Metal Gloss: *Drives freight train under bridge*
Pony: *In the station, buying a ticket. As soon as he gets the ticket, he runs across the platform, and boards his train.*
Hawkeye: *Preparing train for departure*
Stylo: *Looking at orders on paper*
Hawkeye:...

1960 Part 17

posted by Seanthehedgehog

In Seattle, Larry walked out of the company headquarters. The headquarters was located on 10th Avenue. He turned around to speak to the boss before he left.

Larry: *Carrying a suitcase* Thanks again for the promotion.
Boss: You're welcome. Now get going. tu have to get to L.A, and mostrar everypony your promotion papers.
Larry: That's right, I have to get going now.
Boss: *Closes the door*
Larry: *Thinks about everything in the suitcase* Twenty five thousand dollars, free tickets to a Dodger's game, the papers for my promotion, and a new mansion with an 80% discount. *Sees a taxi stop for him*...

1

Saten Twist adventures S3E1 Part 7

posted by Canada24

Twilight: tu know something, girls? We are so lucky to live in this town. I amor tu all! *they all hug*.

AJ: Say? What happened to Saten?

Twilight: He dicho he had other important business to attend.

Saten: *drinking at a bar, his head bandaged a little from the earlier attack*.

Bartender: Don't tu think tu had enough?

Saten: *a bit drunk*I don't tell tu how to live YOUR life!

Trixie: *comes over and finds him*

Bartender: *sees her* Oh wow. She's she's a hottie.. I'm gonna stalk her later.

Saten: ... Are tu a woman?

Bartender: No.

Saten: Good *punches out the bartender*

Trixie: *comes over* tu okay...

1960 Part 3

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Tom caused an accident, and got away without being stopped por the cops.

Pierce & Bob: *In their cars, surrounded por other cars*
Leslie: *Driving the car on a road on a hill, going parallel to the highway*
Karl: *Sees Pierce, and Bob in their cars* Wow, those guys might be there for a long time.
Leslie: *Looks at the other cars* Oh wow. That's a terrible crash. I'm glad I'm not a part of that. *Swerves to the left*
Karl: Keep your eyes on the-
Leslie: *Accidentally goes down the hill, crashing into a tree, and makes the car land on it's roof as it gets on the highway*
Pierce: *Looks at the...

Ponies On The Rails Episode 100 Part 3

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Date: March 4, 1960
Location: Cheyenne Wyoming
Time: 10:45 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Inside the station, Hawkeye, Percy, Stylo, and Dan were outside of Pete's office. They were planning how to save him.

Stylo: Well we haven't come up with anything good.
Percy: What about my plan to call the cops?
Hawkeye: We gotta do something besides just call the cops. Pete needs our help.
Dan: Percy, what did tu hear in the office when tu tried to get in?
Percy: I heard some voices, and someone shouted at me to fuck off. It definitely didn't sound like Pete.
Hawkeye: Yeah he would never say anything like...

1

Saten Twist adventures: S3E1 ... PART 1

posted by Canada24

Saten: So, in conclusion, I believe the painful sensation felt after passing a meal of spicy chillies is proof that the rectum does possess the sense of taste.

Trixie: ... I concur, but tu changed the subject. What are we doing for hearts and hoove’s Day?

Saten: ....... Oh, tu caught that, did you?

Trixie: Come on Saten, tu know I can only be for so long., It was part of the deal... And I don't remember the last time tu even did anything romantic?

Saten: Sure I do.. I got tu that flower.

Trixie: It was Poison Joke.

Saten: How was I suppose to know that!?

Trixie: It had a sign saying it was...

Ponies On The Rails Episode 98 Part 3

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Date: February 23, 1960
Location: Cheyenne Wyoming
Time: 6:58 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Hawkeye, and Metal Gloss were driving to work. Hawkeye was still thinking about what happened yesterday with Rachael.

Metal Gloss: What's wrong? tu seem uncomfortable.
Hawkeye: It's the poni, pony visiting from Kansas City.
Metal Gloss: Rachael? What happened with her?
Hawkeye: She wants me to fecha her, but I told her we were married. I have a feeling she thinks I hate her, but I don't. I just want to be friends with her. What do I tell her?
Metal Gloss: *Leans toward Hawkeye* tu tell her what tu think is right....

On The Block Episode 25 Part 1

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house*
Tom: Hello everypony, and welcome to another episode of On The Block.
Master Sword: Tom, tu already dicho that in the start of the last episode. Come up with something new for once.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Like what?
Master Sword: I don't know. Anything!
Tom: Hmmm...

Three minutos later, this song was playing: link

Master Sword: *Hanging off the edge of a cliff above four sharks that want to eat him* THIS IS...

Ponies On The Rails Episode 97 Part 2

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Date: February 17, 1960
Location: Ogden Utah
Time: 5:54 PM
Railroad: Southern Pacific

The sun was setting, as Anthony sat on the station platform with Ryan, and Donut, waiting for their siguiente assignments.

Michael: *Storms out of the station, and looks at Anthony* tu cause an accident on my line, and don't tell me anything?!!?
Anthony: Roger dicho he was going to tell you. He didn't check the coupling between our train, and engines.
Michael: He dicho tu were to check them! I don't know if this is going to be common with tu now, but if tu keep forgetting to do your work, I'll have tu fired!...

CHiPs

posted by Seanthehedgehog

The Canterlot Highway Patrol is a very busy organization, protecting everyone on, and around the highways of Canterlot. Of course, there are some ponies that despise them, and call these police ponies Chips, o chippies for short.

Jon Baker, and Frank Poncherello, two CHP officers, were riding Harley Davidson motocicletas on one of the highways.

Jon: *Riding his motorcycle siguiente to Frank* It sure is a nice day.
Frank: Not just with the weather, but with the activity. Things are going easy for us.

A blue GT500 passed them going over 80.

Jon: *Rides his motorcycle after the car*
Frank: *Following...

On The Block Episode 24 Part 4

posted by Seanthehedgehog

The Story of Corporal Agarn

Theme song

Though he goes on a rage from time to time
He is a very good friend of mine
And in Fort Courage he is well known as
Corporal Agarn

Starring Master Sword as Corporal Agarn
Tom Foolery as Captain Parmenter
Saten Twist as Sargent O' Rourke
Mortomis as Dobbs, the bugler
Snow Wonder as Wrangler Jane
Cosmic arco iris as Corporal Vanderbilt
Blaze as Corporal Duffy
Sean as Chief Wild Eagle
and Sonic as Crazy Cat

It was a regular día at the fort. Wrangler Jane walked into Captain Parmenter's office.

Captain Parmenter: *Signing papers, but when he sees Jane, he drops...

1

Trixie's funhouse remale: Part 5

posted by Canada24

As I managed to escape. The other two continued fighting.

Trixie continued trying to stab her, AppleBloom, at one point, managed to knee her in the stomach, making her bend over in pain.

AppleBloom found the bat and hit Trixie really hard, saying it was for Sweetie Belle.

But Trixie was somehow able dodged all her other swings.

Trixie punched her in the stomach, but AppleBloom ignored the pain as well.

Trixie attempted to stab AppleBloom but she dodged it.

Ten minutos of fighting, later:

AppleBloom was clearly growing más tired.

At one point, Trixie punched her really hard on the side of her the head....

Ponies On The Rails Episode 85 Part 2

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Date: August 7, 1959
Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming
Time: 8:38 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Jeff went into Pete's office at the station.

Jeff: tu wanted to see me sir?
Pete: Yes. Let me ask tu a question. What do tu know about the Lehigh Valley Railroad?
Jeff: Not much. All I know about it is that it's a short railway in the east coast. Why are tu asking me about it?
Pete: There's a shortage of track repairers in Neigh Jersey. You'll be taking an airplane from this city into Jersey City. From there, a stallion with a sign of both the Union Pacific, and Lehigh Valley logo will be there waiting...