Canada24's club.. Article: parte superior, arriba 20 frases from my favourite character in the Army of Two series... ELLIOT SALEM

parte superior, arriba 20 frases from my favourite character in the Army of Two series... ELLIOT SALEM

posted by Canada24

#1:
Phillip Clyde: I'm going to kill tu both. Then, I'm going to drain all your blood, take out your bones, put your body in a big chair with some elves and reindeer, and sit on your lap and tell tu all the cool shit I want for Christmas.
Elliot Salem: This guy *clearly* had a messed up childhood.
Tyson Rios: [scoff] Ya think?

#2:
Phillip Clyde: No problem, fuck-o.
[gives the middle finger and jumps off the ship]
Elliot Salem: "Fuck-o"?. Who says that!?

#3:
Phillip Clyde: I'm gonna kill tu both, slice tu open and go to an aerobics class waring your intestines for leg warmers!
Elliot Salem: I mean - does that even make sense?

#4:
Phillip Clyde: I'm gonna tear tu up so bad, your own momma ain't gonna recognize you.
Elliot Salem: Yo - leave my momma out of this!

#5:
Salem: hola Ty? Who tu think the best rapper in the Wu- Tang Clan is?
Rios: Elliot.. We just got set por our boss.. Are careers are over.. And were in a life and death situation WHY ARE tu ASKING ME THIS SHIT WAIT NOW!?
Salem: A lot of people say it's the WZA.. But I kinda like Ghostface Killah... Actually I don't think I ever heard the U God album. tu heard that?

#6:
Salem: Yeah you're welcome tu freakin nutcase. WORST! ZOO! EVER!

#7:
Rios: I don't like shooting animals.
Salen: (mockingly) ohh.. Your a good boy Charlie Brown

#8:
Elliot: tu think I made the right choice? Good, I'm glad.. But let me ask tu something? Did tu have to live the rest of your life with your best friends life on hands?... I didn't think so.. So tu can take your god damn reportar and shove it up your ass... And let me tell tu something else.. tu did this.. Not that manic.. He's just a god damn monster that tu created... So tu live with that!

#9:
Murrey: Welcome to Shanghai boys, how tu like it so far?
Elliot: I feel tall!

#10:
Salem: ... I want to kill him... Just need ONE clear shot at him.

#11:
Salem: An elevator? Hell no.. I'm not dying in a box!

#12:
Elliot: Okay.. I think we have a few segundos were no one's trying to kill us.

#13:
Rios: Any bright ideas?
Salem: The brightest!

#14:
Rios: I can't believe tu want to do these private contacts when we JUST got set up.
Salem: Hey.. A man's got to eat.
Rios: Your unbelievable

#15:
Salem: Yo. That was so badass, tu WISH tu had moves like that.

#16:
Rios: That's him!
Salem: No shit!

#17:
Salem: Sense when are tu such a god damn boy scot!?

#18:
Salem and Rios both: Howaa!

#19:
Salem: (to Rios) tu oh me a soda.

#20:
Salem: Let's just get the job done and see what happens

parte superior, arriba 10 songs that are secretly disturbing

posted by Canada24

#1: rosado, rosa Floyd - Young Lust:
Pink, the main character of THE muro album.
Has achieved wealth and fame, and is usually away from home, due to the demands of his career as a touring performer. He is having casual sex with groupies to relieve the tedium of the road, and is living a separate life from his wife.

The end of the song is a segment of dialogue between rosado, rosa and a telephone operator, as rosado, rosa twice attempts to place a transatlantic collect call to his wife. A man answers, and when the operator asks if he will accept the charges, the man simply hangs up. This is how rosado, rosa learns that his wife...

1

Canada24 respuestas dumb questions: PART 2

posted by Canada24

How does sex start?
"With human contact!"

How long can a little girl hold her breathe
"3 weeks"

How do I ask a pregunta on Yahoo Answers?
"YOU JUST DID!!"

How do tu tell which side of the potato chip is saltier?
"Take it to McDonald's"

Do midgets have night vision?
"Only in Mexico"

Can tu lose your virginity if tu fall?
"Only if it's off a bike"

How do I take care of my pet potato?
"With amor and a full stomach"

What if the girl that thinks I'm the dad isn't the mom?
"...................... WHAT!?"

How do I get accepted into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry?
"You draw a lighting bolt on your fourhead,...

Crazy Times FULL STORY... Part five

posted by Canada24

A FEW DAYS LATER:

"Thanks for meeting with us McReary? Were tu followed?" Michael asked.

"No.. I mean.. I don't think so.. What's this about!?" Packie cried, as he came to meet with Michael, Franklyn, Trevor and Lester.

"Who is this punk!? Why dose he get to come!?" Trevor cried.

"He's the leader of his group, so it seems a seguro bet to add him in on the planning" Michael replied.

"I would of rathered tu bring Caryl.. Than THIS loser!" Trevor cried.

"Hey fuck tu ma-

"Hey, hey, can we not do this wait now?" Franklyn cried, stepping in between them.

"Besides Trevor.. Carly IS coming.. She'll just be...

Crazy Times FULL STORY... Part three

posted by Canada24

MEANWHILE:

"Excuse me, are the one that estola Maureen's necklace?" Dash asked a guy she saw smoking on a park bench.

"Oh, tu mean that old Irish lady.. What's it too you?" The guy replied.

"Give it back.. o I will have to hurt you" Dash threatened.

The guy laughed it off.

"Look beautiful.. Why don't tu just get lost before I call my boys over here and MAKE tu lea-

Suddenly his sentence was cut short por Dash violently tackling him to the ground

"I'm not screwing around anymore.. Hand it over" Dash demanded.

"Ahh!.. tu crazy bitch! I'm calling my boys-

Dash cut his sentence short por pressing his...

1

parte superior, arriba ten DICK fathers:

posted by Canada24

#1: DENETHOR - LORD OF THE RINGS:
He loves Boromir.
But could care less about his younger son Faramir.
To point he tells Faramir, to his face, he wishes Boromir was one that survived.
And sends Faramir on a sucide mission.

He redeems though. But dose in the worst possible way.

He falls into madness when he believes a wounded Faramir is dead from a futile effort to retake Osgiliath, leaving Gandalf to command the city defences against the Orc army under Gothmog. But as Gothmog's forces eventually force their way into the city, Denethor tries to kill himself and Faramir on a bonfire. Luckily, Pippin...

2

Windwakerguy430's parte superior, arriba Ten XBox Games I Recommend to Canada24 (If He Hasn't Already Played Them)

posted by windwakerguy430

So, Canada24. He’s a sarcastic, impolite, possibly psychotic jerk, yet that’s what we’re good friends (Of course, I’m only kidding), and what I know about him is that he owns an XBox. And I also know that he as some pretty good games, like GTA, Assassin’s Creed, and Dead Rising. However, there are also those other good games for the console that he probably doesn’t have yet. So, I want to share with him (And all of you) A few games that I well recommend to him. Now, before I start, these are games only for the XBox 360, weather they are on discs, o can be bought from the XBox Store....

1

My parte superior, arriba five most popular reviews

posted by Canada24

#1: ALPHA AND OMEGA STORIES:
My constant angry rants about the heavy amounts of rape, incest, torture, murder and all the hate on poor Kate. Leaves these reviews with a lot of entertainment value.
Along with my ways of comparing the characters to My Little poni, pony and giving people different ways to look at it.
A lot of people say my words are harse, and their probably right.
But still people amor these articles, and constantly ask me to review their stories. Finally giving me a reason to return to this fan base after nearly 4 years of being away from Alpha and Omega...

#2: HELLSING:
I gave the best...

1

6 reviewers from back in my Alpha and Omega days... (I still makes these to this day)

posted by Canada24

#1; LILLYS OPPOSITE SIDE:
Well. Here I go..

Obviously, the main reason for not liking this, is the sex.
So much fuckin sex, sex, SEX!
Sadly, it's not the first story to involve 'incest', nor is it the 'worst'.
Though it's certainly up there.

There's even one between Kate and Lilly in this story.
I mean. For goodness sakes. There sisters, there's so many reasons why that is wrong.
Though least its better than when I read a story about Kate and Lilly 'doing' Winston, and he 'letting them'.
Seriously. What is wrong with people!?

As tu expect.
The full story is the type of deal that makes tu hate Lilly....

2

parte superior, arriba 8 best things about being a Brony

posted by Canada24

#8: PINKIE'S CUTENESS LEVEL's:
Although this can be for EVERY character. Partially Scootaloo.
However.
Fluttershy is overrated.. There. I dicho it.. (sits and waits for the haters)

#7: RULE 84 GAGS:
Though this also counts as the WORST thing.
But either way
I never would of realised how much I was missing out on.
Though. At the same time.
Part of the reason I became a brony in the first place is I found a image of it, when looking though Skyrim images..

#6: poni, pony música VIDEOS:
No comments..

#5: DISCORD:
These days, Discord (John De Lancie) is the main reason I still watch the mostrar itself.
As even though...

2

parte superior, arriba 5 WORST TRAITS ABOUT CANADA24 (Connor T. Noiles):

posted by Canada24

I am differently not someone people should look up to as role model.. Though some people still do...

#1: DOUCHEBAG:
I am not ALWAYS trying to keep the peace.
Sometimes I am trying to make people hate each other even más for my own enjoyment of seeing writers go back and forth at each other.
And when people troll ME I just do what I can to make them hate me even more..

#2: HYPOCRISY:
I am always whining about there needing to be no CLOPPING, but the truth, I DO like lectura them sometimes, kinda makes me a dick when tu think about it..

#3: SELF HATE:
I often make fun of myself.
Saying I'm a stupid...

1

parte superior, arriba 10 Most disturbing moments in human history

posted by Canada24

#10: SLAVERY:
No comment..

#9: ASSASINATIONS:
The idea of it disturbs me..

#8: MEDIEVAL TORTURING:
What was wrong with people back then!?

#7: HALOCOAST:
The Holocaust, also known as the Shoah, was a genocide in which approximately six million Jews were killed por Adolf Hitler's Nazi regime and its collaborators. Some historians use a definition of the Holocaust that includes the additional five million non-Jewish victims of Nazi mass murders, bringing the total to approximately eleven million. Killings took place throughout Nazi Germany and German-occupied territories..

#6: TED BUNDY:
Theodore Robert...

1

parte superior, arriba five bands who sound better in non-scream songs

posted by Canada24

#1: SLIPKNOT:
Slipknot is different. Their the only band I actually LIKE the screaming. espically in PSYCHOSOCIAL.
Especially cause it's not overly used.
But still.
Lesson to DEAD MEMORIES, and tell me that isn't más badass than his scream voice..

#2: BULLET FOR MY VALENTINE:
Again, actually LIKE Matthew Tuck's screams, just like Matt Shadows from Avenged Sevonfold and Corey Taylor of Slipknot.
But it's enfriador, refrigerador when their not..

#3: DROWNING POOL:
They go under the lista from number 2.
But still.
It's nice to hear him using his REAL voice..

#4: cordero OF GOD:
I am not a fan of cordero of God.
Their too death...

3

I'm returning to my WALKING DEAD SPOOFS... In spirit to it, here's BEST OF RICK GRIMES:

posted by Canada24

RICK: (first time seeing zombie) My god.. SHE'S SO DRUNK!

Rick: All I remember is that I was in a police uniform. tu know what that means..?
Morgan: Your a cop?
Rick: Actually. I was gonna say, stripper. But sure, that two.

Rick: (nearly hit por a large wrench) Wow... That was fantastic aim!

Morgan: I don't feel comfortable about wearing a police uniform.. In fact... I'm giving this uniform to the first guy I see.
Rick: (takes it) Funny, that's exactly how I became a cop in the first place.

RICK: por Morgan, hope tu never try to kill me in the future.

RICK: (to Merle while chaining him to pipe) I'm...

Master Sword and Satan Twist Adventures: kill counts

posted by Canada24

MASTER SWORD:

Moneybags: (breaks both of Derpy's arm's so Sword ripped off his arm, broke his nose, and "literary" ripped out his heart).

(I forget the guys name): (Gets violently killed after kidnapping Derpy, Sword even revives him a few times, simply to continue killing him).

Rover: (As punishment for kidnapping and nearly killing Scootaloo, Sword shoves a grenade down his throat and then pulls the pin).

(sword has the biggest kill count but those are the only ones I could think of so far).

------------------------------------------------------------

SATEN TWIST:

AlexMane: (shot dead with Uzi,...

1

parte superior, arriba 8 best walking dead battles in my opinion..

posted by Canada24

#8: DAYS GONE BYE:
No better way to introduce a series, than with a police shoot out, that later leads to someone waking up to a zombie apocalypse (literary).
I mean.
Who HASN'T felt Rick's fear and confusion, what would anybody else do..

#7: TRIGGER FINGER:
When Glenn and Rick try to retrieve a, probably traumatized, Hershal from a bar they are greeted por two strangers witch eventually ends in Rick shooting them both dead, and when their friends find out they get angry and full out gunfight begins.

#6: BESIDE THE DYING FIRE:
The entire first half the episode is one big battle, gotta amor that.....

2

parte superior, arriba five female singers who USE to be hot

posted by Canada24

#5: MADONNA:
Not much to say..

#4: MILEY CYRUS:
I never liked her myself.
But did "respect" her once..
But it's fair to say.
She lost that privilege..

#3: LADY GAGA:
Se probably still is, I don't know.. It's been many many years since I cared about Lady Gaga.
But her song Just Dance was once a token of my childhood, so I should at least mention her under this list..
Putting her as MAYBE still hot, but who hell could tell under all that max up and bizarre hair styles.
At least with Katy Perry tu can tell she's still pretty hot, even under all those stupid outfits and shit..

#2: LINDSEY LOHAN:
A perfectv example of how once innocent people can become FUCKED UP..

#1: BRITTNEY SPEARS:
She use too be so friggin hot,
WHAT HAPPENED!?
No wait..
We KNOW what happened.
She went bold.
And took too many drugs.
Nobody cares about her anymore.
Though at least her voice is still pretty.
Unless the grand theft auto song was written BEFORE her rampage..

2

parte superior, arriba ten most misunderstood/tragic villains..

posted by Canada24

#10: FREDDY KRUEGER: (nightmare on elms street):
It's weird thinking of him as 'tragic' isn't it?
Arguably the main reason he is always defeated por woman, is because there is ONE thing he's still afried of.. Beauty.
Witch is something completely unknown to him.
His birth was something his own "mother" wanted nothing to do with.
She was rapped por a dozen manics and his birth 'wasn't suppose to happen'.
Because of this.
He was sent from orphanage to orphanage where he was constantly bullied por the students, who treated him as a freak because of what happened his mother.
Eventually he was adopted by...

1

Don't go hating me, if the review sucks, and tu refer Windwaker.. (Hows THAT for a title)

posted by Canada24

Well. Since it seems to be all I ever do anymore.
I should may as well. Leave a certain promised review, about something I've been promised to beta read almost three years ago, and still am now.

Well.
Its the first time I ever read a Happy árbol friends Fanfiction.
And I have to say.
Though it's no más then I would of expected. Both good AND bad.
Most fanfic stories tend to get a bit soap Oprahy.
example being some I read from THIS IS THE END, witch, itself, is one of myself favorito! movies, witch made the fanfics that much worse.
So many fuckin James Franco fantasies.
Give me a brake.
He's not even...

1

CHAPTER TWELVE: TREVOR GOES CRAZIER THAN USUAL:

posted by Canada24

Arthur Note: I highly recommend watching the American Dad episode “Ricky Spanish” before this chapter.. o at least youtube him..

The gang spend several days on Trevor's island, where amongst Trevor and Roger unsurprisingly quickly become friends, but also to Klaus, who ended up following them when he realized they were still gone and he didn't know how to feed himself cause, well, he's a human stuck in a fish's body. Pinkie hugs him, o at least his bowl and Klaus playfully acts like it is still counted and goes "aww".

Pinkie spends most of her time at the playa now that she knows it's a...

1

CHAPTER EIGHT: SANTA’S COMING:

posted by Canada24

(Seras is no longer a vampire in my GTA stories.. She's just a old cop who got transferred from Londres to America.. Though she is still a badass, that part hasn't changed)..

ONE año EARLIER:

Carly and Seras are taking a road trip just the two of them, they end up driving though the Deep South where they are pulled over por a corrupt Sheriff, Seras makes efforts to be as polite as she can but he proves himself sexist and arrests them despite neither having done anything wrong. Punching out their left headlights and then planting a bag of marihuana in their trunk. Seras doesn't really help things,...