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1. At the movies: When tu meet acquaintances/ friends.. .
Stupid Question:-
Hey, what are tu doing here?
Answer:-
Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet…
Stupid Question:-
Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-
No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia.. …why don’t tu try again.

3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask…
Stupid Question:-
Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-
Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When tu ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-
Is ! the “Butter Paneer Masala”...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
my friend sent me this text message a while hace and i thought it was hilarious!!!




i need to ask tu somethingand i want tu to be totally honest with me. it may be awkward between us after this but i have to kow how tu feel... I've kept it in for a while now but now it's time to be straight up and just confront you. i hope this doesn't ruin anything we have, i just need to know and i dont see any other way i could get over this. it just doesn't seem fair if i dont gett an answer. i want tu to tell me truthfully, please no matter how harsh it is. i just want your hoest opinion...

Pepsi o Coke?



Ha ha ha ha !!!
Funny.
posted by Sheetal1256
Here are some funny New Year's resolutions for 2012...
I will think of a contraseña other than "password" o "hello".

I will not tell the same story at every get together.

I won't worry so much.

I will cut my hair.

I will grow my hair.

I will stop considering other people's feelings when they so obviously don't consider mine - if that unwashed fellow sits siguiente to me again, I'll tell him he stinks!

I will be más imaginative.

I will not bore my boss por with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some más excuses.

I will do less laundry and use más deodorant.

I will avoid taking a bath whenever...
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added by Juilet1234
posted by Shelly_McShelly
Welcome to The Weakest Link.

Here is a very simple little test comprised of four preguntas to determine the level of your intellect. Your respuestas must be spontaneous and immediate, with no deliberating o wasting time.

And NO CHEATING. On your mark, set....GO!!!

1: tu are competing in a race, and overtake the runner in segundo place.
In which position are tu now?

Answer:

If tu answered that you're now coming first then you're completely wrong. tu overtook the segundo runner and took their place, therefore you're coming second.

For the siguiente pregunta try not to be so dumb.

2 : If tu overtake the last...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
a boy was asked por his teacher to pick some spelling words for his homework. the boy goes inicial and asks his mum "what's a good spelling word?" and the mother respuestas " Shutup, i'm busy", so he writes it down.
he goes to his dad and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and the dad respuestas "da na na na Batman!" so he writes it down.
next he goes to his older sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she respuestas "yeah yeah" so the boy writes it down.
he goes to his younger sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she respuestas "lollipop, lollipop" so he writes it down.
Finally he goes...
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posted by invadercalliope
•Everyone in this place is unhappy. And since they're unhappy, they're probably looking for someone worse off than they are.
•You know who isn't human? tu know who isn't human?! PEOPLE LIKE YOU!
•Up to this day, I've never killed a single human.
•You will never see me again.
•I was going to let tu go; after all, there aren't many of us out there, but you're just such a pain in the ass.
•Please forget about everything.
•Are tu enjoying this?
Kouta: "I thought we were friends."

Lucy: "We are friends, that's why you're still alive."

Kouta: "You killed my father, Kanae.. and my sister Kanae... For that I will never forgive you."
Lucy: "All this time, I've lived in hope of telling tu how sorry I am, I've fought armies, just to have this chance, but now, there's nothing I can say that's good enough."

Kurama: "Regret is the domain of those who have earned the right to look back on the past. All I have is shame."
The End
Okay so if tu live on the eastcoast u are probably getting used to the snow..........so even if u aren't, everybody has the problem of having nothing to do when it snows but sled. So these are a few of the things that i enjoy to do.........hehe!

1. Fill balloons with water. Then leave them outside overnight.............yeah i'm this stupid. The siguiente day, cut the balloons off and tu got.........AN ICE BALL!! (i usually make like 15) Then use them to pay dodgeball. This is especially fun to do in deep snow, when tu can barely mover as it is. Technically, u could use them to do various things,...
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josh groban
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added by youknowit101
Source: trollposts@tumblr
added by PoddoChan
Source: DeviantARt.com
added by zombiestars
added by tamar20
added by Darkshine
added by NomyCake
Source: AngelzFunnys.com
added by iFly_12
O-
-heartbeats-
















OW!!!!!!!!!



Shake a chicka.

Ah

As they came into the voodoo
There was sound out...
Like a sheepdog.
He can make up your apartment.
He let the buck stay
On the carpet.
Sharon ate upon the table.
Makin' sushi... was a navel.
So she rented out the bedroom...
She was struck down...
By a centipede.

Annie are tu walking?
So, Annie are tu walking?
Are tu walking Annie?
Annie are tu walking?
So, Annie are tu walking?
Are tu walking?
Annie are tu walking?
-screams- SO, ANNIE ARE tu WALKING???!!!!
ARE tu WALKING ANNIE??????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dramatic choir:
Annie are tu walking?
With your dentist
Are...
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I was scrolling across deviantART, and came across this HIGHLY shocking news that everyone needs to know about right now!

We all know about copyright infringement and the numerous laws preventing us from using copyrighted material. Some sites and companies take these things very seriously if tu do not have permission from dicho company. But there are sites and companies that's only ask that tu give credit where credit is due. Thankfully like DA.

Now, over the past few days I have just been strolling thru the Internet, visiting some of my fav sites to chill on, and every site has been posting...
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posted by smileypop9
Million has 6 zeros
Billion has 9 zeros
Trillion has 12 zeros
Quadrillion has 15 zeros
Quintillion has 18 zeros
Sextillion has 21 zeros
Septillion has 24 zeros
Octillion has 27 zeros
Nonillion has 30 zeros
Decillion has 33 zeros
Undecillion has 36 zeros
Duodecillion has 39 zeros
Tredecillion has 42 zeros
Quattuordecillion has 45 zeros
Quindecillion has 48 zeros
Sexdecillion has 51 zeros
Septendecillion has 54 zeros
Octodecillion has 57 zeros
Novemdecillion has 60 zeros
Vigintillion has 63 zeros
Googol has 100 zeros.
Centillion has 303 zeros (except in Britain, where it has 600 zeros)
Googolplex has a googol of zeros
Gazillion has 86430 zeros
---------------------------
(CREATED por RAE RI, NOT ME)

Chuck Norris can make onions cry.


Chuck Norris can borrar the Recycling Bin.


Ghosts are actually caused por Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.


Chuck Norris can strangle tu with a cordless phone.


Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.


Chuck Norris once had a corazón attack; his corazón lost.


Chuck Norris doesn't turn the light on; he turns the dark off.


The last digit of pi is Chuck Norris. He is the end of all things.


Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. No one fools Chuck Norris.


When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror, the mirror shatters; not even a mirror is stupid enough to get between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.


Chuck Norris's tears can cure aids, too bad he never cries. (silvaze9)