bella: edward we need to talk.................................................
edward: go ahead we have got all the time in the world.
bella: ok but i don't think your gunna like it.
edward: whats wrong
bella: its nothing really but i do have to say i don't amor tu and i never have. the only reason why i married tu was cuz tu have lots of money and cuz i wanted to be a vampire. now i have got that i don't need tu anymore.
Edward: don't leave me.
bella: i have to cuz jacobs waiting for me in the car.
edward: thats my car
bella: buy a new one
bella: i am also taking renesmee with me. goodby edward. and thanks for the car
edward:noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. not the car
bella: hu hum i dicho goodbuy edward
edward: o sorry goodbuy bella.
and so bella, renesmee and jacob lived happily ever after
edward: go ahead we have got all the time in the world.
bella: ok but i don't think your gunna like it.
edward: whats wrong
bella: its nothing really but i do have to say i don't amor tu and i never have. the only reason why i married tu was cuz tu have lots of money and cuz i wanted to be a vampire. now i have got that i don't need tu anymore.
Edward: don't leave me.
bella: i have to cuz jacobs waiting for me in the car.
edward: thats my car
bella: buy a new one
bella: i am also taking renesmee with me. goodby edward. and thanks for the car
edward:noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. not the car
bella: hu hum i dicho goodbuy edward
edward: o sorry goodbuy bella.
and so bella, renesmee and jacob lived happily ever after
10. Ask about Mike.
9. Ask about Eric.
8. Ask about Jacob.
7. Ask about Edward.
6. After asking about all these boys, inquire as to how much she is paying them, and where in the White Pages she looked for fake fan-boys.
5. When she complains about not being a vampire, throw glitter on her and claim she sparkles just like a vampire in the sun.
4. Ask if the thought of Edward biting her makes her… happy.
3. Say that since Edward is technically dead, she is into necrophilia. Tell her that is sick and wrong, and she should stop with her weird fetishes.
2. Tell her we all know about the real reason she married Edward – the honeymoon.
And the Number One way to annoy Bella Swan?
1. Tell her that tu and Jacob imprinted on each other, and are getting married. Tell her tu are pregnant, and will be with him forever. Videotape the reaction.
Source: link
9. Ask about Eric.
8. Ask about Jacob.
7. Ask about Edward.
6. After asking about all these boys, inquire as to how much she is paying them, and where in the White Pages she looked for fake fan-boys.
5. When she complains about not being a vampire, throw glitter on her and claim she sparkles just like a vampire in the sun.
4. Ask if the thought of Edward biting her makes her… happy.
3. Say that since Edward is technically dead, she is into necrophilia. Tell her that is sick and wrong, and she should stop with her weird fetishes.
2. Tell her we all know about the real reason she married Edward – the honeymoon.
And the Number One way to annoy Bella Swan?
1. Tell her that tu and Jacob imprinted on each other, and are getting married. Tell her tu are pregnant, and will be with him forever. Videotape the reaction.
Source: link
I thought I'd post this poem and try to get constructive feedback ;)
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To Know Her
She is who I see and all that I see.
Every minuto with her is a minuto to know her.
What does she like? What makes her angry?
What makes her laugh like no other?
I watch her mover and learn her moods.
Her needs, I read like a book unbound.
I study her eyes as they speak to me
When words aren’t enough, when they can’t be found.
Her joy is mine, her emotions mover me.
To be what she wants is no arduous task.
To protect her and know her – that’s what I do
So I find it amusing when she would ask:
“How is it that tu know me so well?
Sometimes it seems tu can read my mind.”
“Nah,” I smile. “I just pay attention.”
I become what she wants and needs, por design.
************************
To Know Her
She is who I see and all that I see.
Every minuto with her is a minuto to know her.
What does she like? What makes her angry?
What makes her laugh like no other?
I watch her mover and learn her moods.
Her needs, I read like a book unbound.
I study her eyes as they speak to me
When words aren’t enough, when they can’t be found.
Her joy is mine, her emotions mover me.
To be what she wants is no arduous task.
To protect her and know her – that’s what I do
So I find it amusing when she would ask:
“How is it that tu know me so well?
Sometimes it seems tu can read my mind.”
“Nah,” I smile. “I just pay attention.”
I become what she wants and needs, por design.