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Song: link

Twilight: Let me point this out right now! I'm the most important poni, pony in the entire universe!
Applejack: Did tu even check to see where tu were standing?
Twilight: Why?
Eddie: *Blows his horn as he runs over Twilight*
Rarity: *Watching Eddie leave as he pulls fifteen Southern Pacific boxcars*
Fluttershy: Will she be okay?
arco iris Dash: Somehow, I don't doubt it. Let's get My Little Pornstar: The Fanfiction set up. This is the original version por the way, not the extended one.

This is a parody of My Little Pony. The voice actors for the mane 6 are..

Ice Cube - Twilight Sparkle
Kath Soucie - arco iris Dash
Edward Richtofen from Call Of Duty: Black Ops - Pinkie Pie
Wally from The Cleveland mostrar - Fluttershy
Tabitha St. Germain - Rarity
Ashleigh Ball - aguardiente de manzana, applejack

Now, let's begin with the intro

Intro
Theme song: link

Japanese Men: *Singing* My Rittre Pornstar. My Rittre Pornstar. Ah ah ah ah, My Rittre Pornstar.
Twilight: I used to wonder what friendship could be.
Japanese Men: My Rittre Pornstar.
Twilight: Then I found out it was for faggots.
arco iris Dash: I think I can.
Pinkie Pie: I'm German!
Rarity: I want sex.
Applejack: Faithful, and strong.
Angel: *Shouting at Fluttershy* hola Fluttershy, tu smell like shit!!!!!
Twilight: Man, there's a lot of faggots in this town.
Japanese Men: My Rittre Pornstar. Despite everything, tu are my best friends.

My Little Pornstar: Friendship Is For Faggots

Our story takes place in the año 1968. Twilight Sparkle has been a princess for an entire year, and America has experienced lots of change. As of right now, their army is fighting against the Vietnamese, and Shining Armor is one of the ponies that got drafted to fight in Vietnam.

American Ponies: *Running to cover while firing M16 rifles*
Vietnamese Ponies: *Returning fuego with AK47's*

But, everyone in Pornstarville would experience a new enemy. It all started when Applebloom arrived at her school.

Applebloom: Howdy Sweetie Belle. Why are all of the students standing outside? Shouldn't we be in the school?
Sweetie Belle: Oh Applebloom! It's terrible! Cheerilee got fired!
Applebloom: What? Who would do that to Cheerilee?
Sweetie Belle: Some stallion that drives an naranja car. Not only did he fuego Cheerilee, but he also took Diamond Tiara, and Silver Spoon away. No one has seen them since.
Applebloom: We might be next.
Sweetie Belle: We were told to stay here until he returned. You're lucky he hasn't seen tu yet.
Scootaloo: *Looks down the road, and sees an naranja car coming* I don't know about that.
Sweetie Belle: Applebloom, tu have to get out of here. Find someone to help us, and save Cheerilee, and the others if they haven't been killed yet.
Applebloom: Okay. *Sees a brown stallion get in a car, and hops in the back without the driver noticing*
Applebloom hops into the back of this car
Brown Stallion: *Drives the car with Applebloom in the back*
Sweetie Belle: Good luck Applebloom.
Stallion; *Sees Applebloom in the car, turns around, and chases it*

Song: link

Brown Stallion: *Sees the naranja car get closer to him, and floors it*
Stallion: *Follows the brown stallion's car*
Applebloom: *Looks at the naranja car*
Stallion: *Lightly taps the back of the car Applebloom is in*
Brown Stallion: *Turns left*
Stallion: *Gets to the right side of the car Applebloom is in, and pushes it to the left*
Brown Stallion: *Nearly hits a dark green Cadillac, then turns right*
Stallion: *Hits a fuego hydrant*
Brown Stallion: *Passes an intersection that has a red light*
Stallion: *About to cruzar, cruz the intersection, but gets hit on the right from a big rig hauling a flatbed. He then crashes into a black car that looks just like his*

Applebloom knew she was seguro now. She decided to go tell arco iris Dash about the horrible news.

Stop the song

Applebloom: *Hops out of the car as it passes arco iris Dash's cloudhouse* arco iris Dash?! *Stands on parte superior, arriba of an Oldsmobile* arco iris Dash, I need your help!!
arco iris Dash: *Comes out of her nube house, and lands in front of Applebloom* What's the problem? *Sees a purple car stop behind Applebloom* (Who's car could this be?)
Stallions: *Get out of the car, and walk toward Applebloom* tu there! We want to have a word with you!
Applebloom: Leave me alone!! *Running away*
Stallions: *Chasing Applebloom. They grab her, puñetazo, ponche her, and drag her toward the car*
Applebloom: This is a mad house!! A maad hooouse!!! *Gets placed in the el maletero, tronco of the car*
Stallions: *Drive away*

arco iris Dash decided to tell Princess Celestia about the horror that she just saw. She flew back into her cloudhouse, and made a call to the princess.

arco iris Dash: *Holding onto the phone* Please pick up.
Celestia: *Answers the call* Hello?
arco iris Dash: Princess? This is arco iris Dash-
Celestia: *Pleased* Dashie! What's happening my friend?
arco iris Dash: Nothing good. tu see-
Celestia: Have I ever introduced tu to my friend Tirek? We're coming down to Pornstarville to visit you, your friends, and see a new film called Where Eagles Dare. Care to registrarse us?
arco iris Dash: Okay.
Celestia: Good. *Hangs up*

6 hours later

arco iris Dash: *With Princess Celestia, and Tirek* It's great to see tu two, but I have something important to tell you. Applebloom, and her friends are in trouble.
Celestia: Oh don't worry about them arco iris Dash. Those three can get away with anything.
Tirek: Princess. The movie?
Celestia: Oh yes. We must get going arco iris Dash. Can tu go with us?
arco iris Dash: I'm sorry Celestia, but I have other things to do. Pinkie Pie, and Twilight want me to help them expand the library.
Celestia: Oh well. Perhaps another time. *Walks away with Tirek*

At the movie theater, Celestia, and Tirek were waiting for their popcorn.

Tirek: The movie starts in seven minutes. We have plenty of time.
Celestia: Okay. tu know Tirek, I want to tell tu something-
Movie Pony: Miss Celestia, do tu want mantequilla on your popcorn?
Celestia: Ugh, James! Please don't interrupt me while I'm talking!
Movie Pony: Fine, I'll just give tu the kernels! *Muttering to himself*
Tirek: tu were saying Celestia?
Celestia: So, if anything bad were to happen to me, god forbid, tu can take my place as princess of Pontiac.
Tirek: tu mean, be the prince of Pontiac? Do tu really mean that? It's a huge responsibility.
Celestia: Yes, I do mean it. You're a good guy, and I know you'll take good care of everyone.
Tirek: Thank tu Celestia. tu don't know how much this means to me. por the way, I have a really awesome barco that I want to take a ride on with you, after the movie.
Celestia: I'd be delighted.

After the movie, Celestia, and Tirek went to the harbor to ride on Tirek's boat. It was dark por the time they arrived.

Tirek: Are tu ready for the ride?
Celestia: Yes I am, and might I add, this is a very nice barco tu have.

They both got on board, and the barco left the harbor. They didn't go far though, because the barco started to sink. Tirek, and the driver of the barco swam to the harbor, but unfortunately, Celestia drowned.

Song (Start it at 1:31:52): link

Celestia's funeral was held in Pontiac. Everyone from all over America came to the funeral, including the mane 6. Many ponies had some things to say, including how much they loved Celestia, and how they were going to miss her. Everyone felt remorse, and sadness, and some had tears coming out of their eyes. Princess Celestia was a wonderful princess, and would be missed por everyone.

The día after Celestia's funeral, Tirek arrived at the town's courthouse.

Court Pony: Good morning Tirek. I have the papers for you. *Hands Tirek several papers stapled together. The first page says how to rule Equestria nicely*
Tirek: Thank tu sir. *Leaves the courthouse, while looking at the papers*

Song: link

Five months, and eight days later, it was new years day, 1969. Since Tirek has been the new prince of Pontiac, things did not go well. Unlike Celestia, Tirek was very mean. He made frequent visits to Pornstarville, and was disgusted with the population of mares. Slowly, stallions have been taking over their place.

One day, Rarity parked her car in front of Carousel Boutique, and was listening to this song on her I pad: link


Rarity: *Walks into her boutique turning the volume up higher, and sees Tirek*
Tirek: Come here Rarity. We need to talk.
Rarity: *Comes closer to Tirek*
Tirek: I'm not happy with tu Rarity. Do tu know why?
Rarity: Is it because I'm listening to a genre of música that hasn't been created yet on a piece of technology that also has not been created yet?
Tirek: tu were fifteen minutos late yesterday when delivering your dresses to Neigh York City. Explain yourself.
Rarity: With all due respect, it was the police at the entrance of the Holland Tunnel. They wouldn't let me pass, even though I had fifty cents, for the toll.
Tirek: Now Rarity, I know you're not a bad pony. tu know what happens to bad ponies here. Right?
Rarity: *Looks out her window*
Roseluck: *Gets executed por an naranja stallion*
Tirek: I shall see tu later. *Leaves the boutique* And get rid of the music, and whatever it is it's coming out of!

Later that night, when Rarity was sleeping, three stallions walked in. They took Rarity away from her home.

siguiente morning, Tirek ordered arco iris Dash to pull five wagons full of frutas from Sweet manzana, apple Acres to the school.

arco iris Dash: *In her usual cheerful state, walking to the wagons*
Stallions: *Staring at arco iris Dash* That's too heavy for you. I don't know why Tirek assigned tu to pull those wagons.
arco iris Dash: These aren't too heavy for me. *Gets herself hitched up*
Applejack: *Comes out with Big Macintosh, and Granny Smith* Taking the frutas to the school arco iris Dash?
arco iris Dash: Yes.
Stallion: She's not going to make it.
Big Macintosh: Don't doubt it. There's one way she does it.

Song: link

arco iris Dash: *Slowly pulls the wagons* I think I can. I think I can. I think I can. *Gaining speed* I think I can. I think I can. I think I can. I think I can.
Stallion: Wait a minute, didn't this already happen in one episode?
Applejack: Yeah.

After that ended, arco iris Dash left the frutas at the school, and was pulling más wagons to town hall, when she saw Pinkie Pie with Twilight, and Derpy at Rarity's boutique.

arco iris Dash: What's going on?
Pinkie Pie: arco iris Dash, it's terrible!! Zhey kidnapped Rarity!
Tirek: *Arrives* Pinkie, are tu crazy holding unauthorized meetings behind my back?! Just look at arco iris Dash's wagons! Any second, there could be a huge accident!
Stallions: *Crash into arco iris Dash's wagons*
Tirek: That's it Pinkie, you'll be hearing from me later.

That night in Sugarcube Corner, Pinkie Pie was making más cupcakes when the stallion with the naranja car stopped in front of the store.

Stallion: *Walks into Sugarcube Corner*
Pinkie Pie: tu are one of zhe stallions vorking for Tirek! Vhat are tu doing here?!
Stallion: To take tu out tu German! *Knocks out Pinkie Pie, and takes her away*

siguiente morning, Tirek forced everyone in Pornstarville to meet with him in Sugarcube Corner.

Tirek: Okay everyone. Have tu noticed a missing pony?
arco iris Dash: tu took Pinkie Pie away? How could you?!
Tirek: That's right, I did take her away. The rest of tu are now on probation!

For arco iris Dash, this was the last straw, she decided to go on a rescue mission to save her best friend. That night, she got the keys to her brand new Dodge Charger, and with another song from the future, she started her search.

Song: link

arco iris Dash: *Starts her car, and drives it*
Vinyl Scratch: *Walking down the street, and sees arco iris Dash*
arco iris Dash: *Looking in buildings, hoping to find Pinkie Pie. She turns right at an intersection, and continues looking for Pinkie Pie*

arco iris Dash looked all over Pornstarville, but couldn't find Pinkie Pie anywhere. She drove into Pontiac, and looked for her there. Alas, there was no sign of her friend. arco iris Dash was just about to give up her buscar when suddenly...

arco iris Dash: *Sees an naranja car* Uh oh. That's one of Tirek's ponies. *Turns right, and turns off the music* I hope he didn't see me.
Stallion: *Keeps going straight*
arco iris Dash: Phew, that was close. *Hears tapping on her window, and sees Pinkie Pie. She lowers the window*
Pinkie Pie: arco iris Dash, I'm so glad I found you.
arco iris Dash: I'm so glad tu found me too. Now hop in. I have to get tu out of here.

And with Pinkie Pie at her side, arco iris Dash left Pontiac.

Pinkie Pie: Do tu zhink anyone is following us?
arco iris Dash: I hope not. Keep an eye out for anyone that tu think is working for Tirek.
Pinkie Pie: Jawohl Regenbogen Strich.
arco iris Dash: As much as I'm glad I saved you, please speak English.
Pinkie Pie: Okay. *Sees an naranja car behind her* Remember seeing an naranja Chevrolet Nova?
arco iris Dash: What? *Looks behind her* Oh no, that's one of Tirek's ponies! *Floors it*
Stallion: *Follows arco iris Dash*
Pinkie Pie: Zhere's not much he can do.
Stallion: *Opens a window on his car, and grabs a revolver*
Pinkie Pie: Uh, I take it back!
Stallion: *Shoots the back window on arco iris Dash's car twice*
Pinkie Pie: Did tu bring any veapons?
arco iris Dash: No.
Pinkie Pie: Was zum Teufel?! How could tu forget?!
arco iris Dash: I didn't forget. *Hears a bullet hit her car's door* I didn't think I'd need one.
Pinkie Pie: Vell zhis is vhere you're proven wrong my friend. If I vas rescuing you, I'd bring several guns!
Tirek: *Blocks the road with a Jeep*
arco iris Dash: That's not good! *Swerves, and drives off the road*

The car crashed through the roof of a building.

arco iris Dash: Ugh... *Massaging her forehead* Are tu okay Pinkie?
Pinkie Pie: Ja, but I'm still cruzar, cruz at tu for not bringing any veapons!
arco iris Dash: *Gets out of the car with Pinkie Pie* I think we lost those guys.
Stallion: Oh no tu didn't. *Points the gun at arco iris Dash* Now, both of tu are coming out with us.
Tirek: *Arrives* Naughty naughty mares. tu shouldn't have tried to escape. Stallions are better.
arco iris Dash: Is this what all of the fighting is about? Because we're mares?
Pinkie Pie: Sounds stupid if tu ask me.
Tirek: SHUT UP! Stallions are superior!
Stallion: Now just come with us.
arco iris Dash: Okay. *Walks with Pinkie Pie toward Tirek, and the stallion, but they accidentally step on a high speed model train*
Tirek: Wait. Where are we?
Stallion: *Looks around him, and sees lots of model trains* We're at a model train shop.
Tirek: Get on that train, and stop them. I'm going to wait for tu further up the line.
Stallion: *Gets on the train as the last car passes him*

Song: link

arco iris Dash: We're going to escape!
Pinkie Pie: Jawohl.
Stallion: *Walks up to Pinkie Pie, and arco iris Dash, pointing the gun at them* Not if I have anything to say about it.
arco iris Dash: *Hits the stallion, and watches him land on the front of another model train*
Pinkie Pie: Good one.
Tirek: *Angry. He tries to grab the two mares, but accidentally pushes them onto the other train* Oh great.
arco iris Dash: Now he's up front.
Stallion: What? *Turns around, and sees arco iris Dash with Pinkie Pie. He fires one bullet from his gun, but he hits the radio, and changes the music*

Song: link

Stallion: *Fires another bullet from his gun, and shoots the coupling between the train, and the car that Pinkie Pie is on, just as soon as they pass a switch. The train goes straight, and Pinkie's car goes to the right*
Pinkie Pie: *Leaning forward, making her car go faster then the train* Don't worry Dashie, everyzhing is under control. *Takes the gun from the stallion* I'll have zhat if tu don't mind, eh? *Looks in front of her, and sees a window in the wall* Whoa!!!

The car she was on hit a set of buffers, and she flew through the window.

arco iris Dash: *Slowly moves up toward the front of the train*
Pinkie Pie: *On a luggage trolley siguiente to the train, holding a net* Tally ho! Leave it to me Dashie. I'll catch zhat pony. *Raises the net, but it gets caught on a moose head, and she falls on the back of the train* Aaaahhhh!!!
arco iris Dash: *Sees the stallion uncouple the locomotive from the train, and tries to catch him*
Pinkie Pie: Get him Dashie!
Stallion: *Going faster, he hits the button for a switch track, making him go adelante, hacia adelante while the two mares go right*
Pinkie Pie: *Sees the end of the line* Dashie, ve're doomed!
arco iris Dash: *Sees a box full of train tracks, and grabs it. She quickly lays down más track to make the train turn around, and follow the stallion on the locomotive*
Pinkie Pie: Mind zhe table!!
arco iris Dash: *Puts down track to make the train go quickly to the right, then to the left*
Pinkie Pie: *Frightened* AAAAHHHHHH!!!
Stallion: *Looks at the straight track in front of him, thinking he will get away*
arco iris Dash: *Laying down track, letting her train cruzar, cruz the track that the stallion is travelling on*
Pinkie Pie: Gotcha! *Grabs the locomotive* Was ist das?
Stallion: *On the tender of the locomotive. He sees the two mares catching up to them*
arco iris Dash: *Laying down track, having them siguiente to the stallion*
Pinkie Pie: All yours Dashie!

The stallion was reaching the end of the line, and suddenly, the tender he was on hit the buffers, and he was airborne.

arco iris Dash: *Laying down track having her train stay below the stallion*

Eventually, the train crashed into a drawer, and arco iris Dash was on the ground.

Stallion: *Falling towards arco iris Dash*
arco iris Dash: *Grabs a glass bottle, and has the stallion land in that. His body gets stuck in it, and his head sticks out*
Pinkie Pie: *Rolls over to arco iris Dash from the end of the train* Wunderbar! We did it. Now we must reportar to zhe authorities about Tirek doing a lousy job!

But they had no need to do that. Someone already beat them to it.

arco iris Dash: *Walks out of the model train comprar with Pinkie Pie, and sees Twilight Sparkle* Twilight?
Twilight: Yeah man. Who else were tu expectin'?! Mothafuckin' Malcolm X?
Pinkie Pie: So much for making a fan fiction vithout swearing.
arco iris Dash: There already was swearing. Remember the intro?
Pinkie Pie: Shit, I forgot about zhat!
Twilight: Anyway man, I should have taken Princess Celestia's spot! o Luna! Why did she let fuckin' Tirek take her place man?!
Tirek: Because we were close friends. *Gets pushed into a police car* I'll break out of jail one day, and I'll get back at you! ALL OF YOU!!!!!
Twilight: Nigga, I don't think so!
arco iris Dash: Why not?
Twilight: Because this fan fiction was suppose to focus on me, but it didn't! So I'm puttin' an end to it!!
Pinkie Pie: tu can't just do zhat. It's unfair to-

The End

Applejack: Thank's for watching everyone.
Kevin: We'll be back siguiente week with episodes from On The Block.
added by Seanthehedgehog
The original theme
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por The fresa Alarm Clock
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Source: 9081375yirjrewretew
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No derailments!
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Song: link

Sean The Hedgehog: *Holding a .44 Magnum* Hedgehog. Sean The Hedgehog.
Con Mane: Wrong! That's my role!
Sean The Hedgehog: Sorry.
Con Mane: *Clears his throat* Hello, my name is Mane. Con Mane. I'm hosting the S.S.S.S. That's a lot of S's. Now, our line up for tonight is right here.

8 PM - Dr. Ani (A Con Mane Story) Rated PG

8:30 PM - Six Shooters 3 Rated R

Con Mane: Now I'm going to get a milkshake. Stirred, not shaken.

In case tu are wondering, ani is korean for no.

Three old blind stallions were walking alongside a calle to a club. They were all walking with canes making sure they weren't...
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It's a lectura 6-chime whistle. The best whistle ever.
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