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posted by Seanthehedgehog
por the año 1904 many ponies have traveled the seven seas to find hidden treasure. All of that pirate stuff stopped in the 30's, as a war between Equestria and England started. Before that war, many ponies have found what would now be worth over 60,000 bits today. 2031 however was the año that a poni, pony found a lot of treasure worth 100,000 bits. Here is her story, which started in Ponyville.

Pinkie Pie: You're probably all wondering why I called tu here.
arco iris Dash: It better not be something random.
Pinkie Pie: It isn't. For There is an island 30 miles from Manehattan with a treasure chest full of valuables worth at least 100,000 bits.
Rarity: What kind of valuables?
Pinkie Pie: Anything from Jewelry to diamonds.
Rarity: I'm in.
Applejack: If it's real, Ah'm in as well.
Fluttershy: I don't know.
Twilight Sparkle: We're all going, why can't you?
Fluttershy: It's not ours, and that's stealing.
arco iris Dash: We're not stealing if someone left it in the ground.
Pinkie Pie: She's right. We must go now!

At the Manehattan docks Pinkie got her pirate crew set up.

Pinkie Pie: I shall drive the ship.
Applejack: Me, and Twilight will be the chefs.
arco iris Dash: I will be captain.
Pinkie Pie: NEIN! I already chose the captain.
Twilight: Is it you?
Pinkie Pie: no.
Fluttershy: Is it any of these ponies? *points at background ponies & OC's*
Pinkie Pie: Nope. I chose someone that can get us out of nearly any situation.

The captain Pinkie Pie was talking about soon arrived in a blue muscle car. That car was a 1969 Chevrolet Corvette.

arco iris Dash: Is it really?
Sean: Hello everypony.
Bonbon: That's the captain?
Lyra: He's a hedgehog.
Sean: When I was told about this treasure hunt I had to get involved, and Pinkie Pie allowed me to be captain.
arco iris Dash: Well at least Pinkie was right about the "Can get us out of every situation" part.
Tourists: Ok lets get on. We will see some ponies reenact a crew that got money off an island.
arco iris Dash: ?
Pinkie Pie: Now that our entire crew is here. Let us set sail.

The barco then leaves Manehattan docks, heading for the island 30 miles away. Pinkie then decided to have every poni, pony sing a song.

Lyra & bonbon: When the course is laid, and the anchors weighed. A sailor's blood begins racing.
Twilight: With our hearts unbound, and our flag unfurled.
Jade: We're on our way and off to see the world.
Everypony: On our way and off to see the world. hola ho, we'll go anywhere the wind is blowing.
Vinyl Scratch: Tough ponies are we!
Everypony: Sailing for adventure on the deep blue sea.
arco iris Dash: Isn't there any place I can go without any poni, pony singing? *flies away*
Snips & Snails: Danger walks the deck we say what the heck. We laugh at the perils we're facing.
Rarity: Every storm we ride is it's own reward
Applejack: And people die from falling overboard.
Everypony: People die from falling overboard. hola ho, we'll go anywhere the wind is blowing. Hoist the sails & sing!
Fluttershy: Sailing for adventure on something blue.
arco iris Dash: really? I amor to see them cry when they walk the plank.
Derpy: I prefer to cut a throat.
Octavia: I amor to hang them high and watch their little hooves try to walk in the air while their faces turn blue.
arco iris Dash: >:(
Octavia: Just kidding. It's a good life on a boat.
CMC: There are distant lands with burning sands. That call across the ocean.
Tourists: There are bingo games every fun filled day. With margaritas at the midnight buffet
Everypony: Margaritas at the midnight buffet. hola ho we'll go anywhere the wind is blowing.
arco iris Dash: Should have never gone!
Everypony: Sailing for adventure on the bounding main.
Pinkie Pie: The salty breezes whisper. Who knows what lies ahead? I just know I will find a lot, for me & all my friends.
Sean: The stars will be our compass. Wherever we may roam. And our mates will always be just like a family. And though we may put into port the sea is always home.
Derpy: I really like this song don't tu Dr. Whooves?
Dr. Whooves: Yeah it's cool.
Everypony: We'll chase our dreams standing on our own Over the horizon to the great unknown. hola ho we'll go anywhere the wind is blowing bold and Valiente and free!! Sailing for adventure
Applejack: It's so nauseating
Everypony: Sailing for adventure
Rarity: So exhilarating
Everypony: Sailing for adventure
Tourists: We are celebrating!
Everypony: On the deep blue sea!

The song ended, and Pinkie was going over roll call.

Pinkie: Applejack?
Applejack: Aye aye.
Pinkie: Fluttershy?
Fluttershy: uuh. *raises hoof*
Pinkie: Derpy Hooves?
Derpy Hooves: Derp.
Pinkie: Dinky Hooves?
Dinky: derp.
Pinkie: Dead Dinky?
Derpy: *holds skeleton* Derp.
Sean: ?
Pinkie Pie: Vinyl Scratch?
Vinyl: Aye.
Pinkie Pie: Headless George?
headless pony: *raises hoof*
Sean: !!
Pinkie Pie: Big fat ugly potro eating mare?
Huge stallion: Aye.
Pinkie Pie: Green hay?
Shredder: *plays guitar*
Pinkie Pie: Octavia?
Octavia: *glances at Shredder* aye aye.
Sean: Ok. Can I see every poni, pony in my quarters?

At the captain's quarters

Sean: WHO HIRED THIS CREW?!!? This is the most bloodthirsty, motherfucking fucked up crew I've ever seen so who hired them?
Everypony: *points at Pinkie*
Pinkie: *points at Gummie*
Sean: Your pet alligator hired the crew?
Pinkie: What? No, that's silly. The poni, pony that lives in Gummie hired the crew.
Sean: headless ponies, and one that lives in a baby alligator. My god.
Derpy: Isn't it My Celestia?
Sean: Not where I'm from.
Derpy: Where are tu from?
Sean: Mobius. It's another planet, which I placed into yours.
Pinkie: So tu created Equestrius.
Sean: Pretty much.

Later that night.

Green hay: *playing kill the D.J.*
Tourists: *dance to music*
Rarity: How does someone dance to that?
Applejack: Ah don't know, but it sure does sound cool.
Rarity: How does it sound cool, when there's too much profanity?
Applejack: It just does. Where's the captain?

At my quarters

Sean: *looks at sky*
arco iris Dash: Hi Sean.
Sean: hola Dash, and Pinkie.
Pinkie Pie: What are tu doing in here? The party is out there.
Sean: I'm just relaxing, remembering those battles we've gone through before.
Pinkie Pie: Which one are tu thinking about now?
Sean: The fight for Stalliongrad.

Seventeen years hace

Stalliongrad December 30, 2014

Discord: If I can't have stalliongrad no one can.
Sean: Dash carry us up there.
arco iris Dash: Ok, hang on *flies up*
Discord: Now.
Blaze: *drops bomb*
arco iris Dash: *kicks bomb into air*
poni, pony alliance: *cheers*
Applejack: Lets get on!
Sean: Give up Discord.
Discord: No. tu may have destroyed my bomb, but I have another.
Sean: Chaos control!

Now we are in another city.

Blaze: tu idiot. tu took us back to Manehattan.
Sean: Oh damnit! *looks out window*
Applejack: What is it?
Sean: I think tu mean Manhattan.
Blaze: *Looks at Brooklyn Bridge*
Discord: What is that?
Blaze: *sets hands on fire*
Sean: Get down!
Blaze: *throws fire*
arco iris Dash: *fights Discord*
Applejack: We're gonna hit the bridge!
Blaze: *hits Sean*
Sean: *hits Blaze*
arco iris Dash: *K.O's Discord*
Sean: *throws Blaze onto bridge*
Blaze: tu think tu can kill me?
arco iris Dash: *grabs axe*
Applejack: *runs toward Blaze*
Blaze: *pushes Applejack*
Sean: A.J! *grabs Applejack*
arco iris Dash: *swings axe*
Blaze: *grabs axe, and sets arco iris Dash on fire*
arco iris Dash: *falls* AAAA
Sean: NO!
Blaze: *nearly hits me*
Sean: Hang on!
Applejack: *holds on to bridge*
Blaze: *pushes me*
Sean: *hits Blaze*
Blaze: *kicks Applejack*
Applejack: *screams*
Blaze: I can't believe your helping these pussies.
Sean: They're not pussies! All of them do amazing things.
Blaze: They're all fucking lame.
Discord: *wakes up* what the..?
Sean: GO TO HELL!! *hits Blaze*
Blaze: *pushes me toward cable*
Sean: *grabs cable*
Blaze: *hits cable 5 times*
Sean: *hits Blaze*
Blaze: *hits me with axe*
Sean: *pushes Blaze*
Blaze: *loses footing*
Discord: *watches in horror*
Blaze: *tries to get back up*
Discord: Blaze! Blaze!!
Blaze: *laughs and falls off bridge*

Back to today.

Sean: Such a terrible time.
arco iris Dash: Both of us nearly died.
Sean: aguardiente de manzana, applejack risked her neck to save you. I'm surprised she survived the fall.
Pinkie Pie: Are we going to talk about our past o are we gonna party?!
Sean: Party!!

Rarity & aguardiente de manzana, applejack were having a conversation when...

Rarity: We have 20 miles to go until we get to that island.
Applejack: Ah hope all this isn't for nothing.
Rarity: Pinkie is being serious about this.
Applejack: Since when did she take things seriously?
Derpy & Octavia: *kidnap aguardiente de manzana, applejack & Rarity*
Sean: hola Dash can tu get aguardiente de manzana, applejack for me?
arco iris Dash: Sure.
Pinkie Pie: Good, cuz he's busy helping with the tourists.
Tourist poni, pony 33: I need a hotdog.
Sean: Coming right up.

Inside the ship

Octavia: What are we going to do with you?
Derpy: I know *farts on Applejack*
Applejack: oh man that smells bad.
Octavia: Other then that?
Derpy: Hmm. Get Rarity.
Rarity: What are tu gonna do to me? Why do tu hate me? I'm british just like you.
Octavia: Get the ropes.
Derpy: *ties Rarity*
Octavia: *spins wheel*
Rarity: Whoa. I'm getting taller. This feels great!
Octavia: It's not working. Get that torch.
Derpy: *grabs torch*
Applejack: What are ya'll gonna do?
Derpy: We're going to set tu on fire.
Applejack: NO! Ah don't wanna be set on fire! Ah'm already orange!
arco iris Dash: hola Applejack? Sean wants tu to-
Octavia: ooh.
Derpy: What? *sits on torch* Oh my muffins!
arco iris Dash: You're trying to kill my friends. How dare you!?

arco iris Dash brought the traitors to be punished.

Sean: Hhhm.
Octavia: (Don't lock us up)
Sean: arco iris Dash, lock up these two for the remainder of the voyage!
Octavia: Fuuuck!
Derpy: *cries* Why is this happening? I just don't know what went wrong!
Octavia: Shut up!
Rarity: How am I going back to my normal size?
Twilight: With magic *performs spell*
Rarity: I'm going to miss being tall, but it was very hard to deal with.
Sean: Pinkie, I think it's a good idea tu give me the map after what just happened.
Pinkie Pie: I don't know.
Sean: I didn't wanna have to do this, but as captain I order tu to give me the map.
Pinkie Pie: *gives map*
Sean: Dash, find a seguro spot for this.
arco iris Dash: *locks map in safe*

It's been 5 days since we've been in the sea. We're halfway there, but the wind has stopped, and now everyone is bored, hungry, and thirsty.

Fluttershy: What do we do?
Vinyl Scratch: I don't know. *inhales* I'VE GOT cabina FEVER!!
Jade: Ah got it to
Everypony: cabina FEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pinkie Pie: Every poni, pony sing! I've got cabina fever, it's burning through my brain
Snips: I've got cabina fever it's driving me insane.
Everypony: We've got cabina fever, we're flipping our bandanas. Been stuck at sea so long we've simply gone bananas.
Dr. Whooves: Ariba
Dinky: *playing maracas*
Everypony: We've got cabina fever, we've lost what sense we had! We've got cabina fever, we're all going mad!
Applejack: Grab yer partner por the ears, lash him to the wheel. Do si do step on their hoof, and listen to him squeal. Allemende left, allemende right it's time to sail o sink. oscilación yer partner over the side, and drop him in the drink. *throws Twilight overboard*
Rarity: We've got cabina fever
Doughnut Joe: No if's and, o buts.
Rarity: We're disoriented
Doughnut Joe: And demented, and a little nuts.
Pinkie & Fenix: Ach du liebe, Vriendscoupe bus. Sauerbraten weiner schnitzel, und wunderbar.
German military: We were sailing, sailing the wind was on our side.
Sean: Und then it died.
Boris: I've got cabina fever, I think I lost my grip.
Charleen: I'd like to get my hands on whoever wrote this script!
Huge stallion: I was floating neath the tropic moon. And dreaming of a blue lagoon. Now I'm as crazy as a loon.
Everypony: cabina fever has ravaged all aboard! This once proud vessel has become a floating physco ward! We were sailing, sailing heading who knows where, and now though we're all here we're not all there *goes crazy for ten segundos flat* cabina fever yeah!
Twilight: Look! The wind has returned! We're moving again.

Let's go back to Derpy & Octavia in jail.

Octavia: Somepony get me out of here!!
Derpy: What was that song just being played?
Octavia: What are tu talking about?
Derpy: It was something like, Kevin fever yeah.
Twilight: Let's go. We have to get the treasure.

Twilight helped Derpy & Octavia escape, then they were making their way off the boat.

Twilight: tu two wait here. We need Pinkie since she has the map.
Octavia: Oh perfect. tu better get her quickly.
Twilight: Pinkie? Come here.
Pinkie Pie: *hops toward Twilight* Guten Tag Twilight. *laughs*
Twilight: Stop speaking german, and come with me.
Pinkie Pie: Nein, ich bin Deutsch, damit ich sie sprechen kann, wenn ich will.
Twilight: What? *kidnaps Pinkie* Row!
Octavia: Can't tu use magic to teleport us?
Twilight: I can, but I'm not teleporting tu guys.
Derpy: Aaawww.
Tourist poni, pony 4: *drives jetski past boat* How much longer?
Tourist poni, pony 2: Keep going! Don't stop towing me.
Tourist poni, pony 4: I'm getting low on fuel!

That night on the island

Pinkie Pie: tu kidnapped me?
Twilight: Yes I did. Now tu work for me.
Pinkie Pie: But I thought we were friends!
Twilight: Who would want to be friends with you? Give us the treasure map.
Pinkie Pie: I don't have it.
Twilight: Well then I'll get it, and kill everyone onboard.
Derpy: Doesn't she remember?
Twilight: No. I'll be right back. *teleports*
Sean: Hi Twilight, have tu seen Pinkie Pie anywhere? And where did tu come from?
Twilight: *Hits Sean* Where's the treasure map?
Sean: tu just hit me. Why should I tell you?
arco iris Dash: Is everything ok here?
Twilight: *Shoots arco iris Dash*
arco iris Dash: Ow. What was that for? *kills Twilight*
Sean: Are tu alright?
arco iris Dash: My head nearly got shot off, and your asking me if I'm alright?
Sean: Take it easy, Rarity'll get it fixed.

Back at the island

Pinkie Pie: So when did Twilight say she'd get back?
Octavia: I'm not sure. Why don't tu take us to the treasure?
Pinkie Pie: *shakes head no*
Derpy: Do it o tu die.
Pinkie Pie: Allright I'll help you.

Pinkie was forced to find the treasure for Derpy & Octavia, who just formed another pirate crew.

Pinkie Pie: This is fake. tu just had Twilight hypnotize some ponies.
Octavia: Not all of them. How much further?
Pinkie Pie: Oh, I don't know.. *runs away*
Derpy: *shoots gun twice*
Octavia: Hold your fire. There's no way she can escape.

But she did. arco iris Dash flew to the rescue, and got her friend off the island.

Pinkie Pie: Danke arco iris Dash.
arco iris Dash: Now I see why they threatened to kill you.
Pinkie Pie: What does my german have to do with it?
Sean: Lets stop complaining. We're close to the island.
Pinkie Pie: Why didn't tu say something? Land ho!
Applejack: We're there already?
Tourist poni, pony 3: Line up in a single file line, and watch the ponies reenact a fight scene.
Pinkie Pie: This is not a reenactment!
Tourist pony1: They really take this seriously.

Back on the island.

Derpy: She's gone!
Octavia: Well then. Let's find her.
Cursed pony23: There's a ship! *runs off*
Cursed poni, pony 42: AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!
Octavia: Come back tu cowards!
Rarity: I just remembered Twilight's dead.
Sean: Everypony get ready. *grabs sword*
Derpy: *shoots rocket launcher*
Sean: LOOK OUT!!
Pinkie Pie: *dodges missile*
arco iris Dash: Good work. Now lets fight them for the treasure.
Octavia: Fight tu basterds!
Cursed pony11: *fights Pinkie Pie*
Fenix: I'm calling the military.
Pinkie Pie: Wunderbar.
Sean: *kills cursed pony* Just like old times eh?
arco iris Dash: *blocks attack* Eeyup
Big Mac: That's mah line. *shoots at arco iris Dash*
Sean: *blocks shots* Where's Octavia?
Octavia: Right here.
Sean: Lets duel, shall we?
Octavia: *hits sword*
Sean: *kicks Octavia*
Octavia: Oh. *swings sword*
Sean: *blocks attack* Let's see how tu like being attacked. *attacks Octavia*
Tourist ponies: Sean sean, he's our stallion. If he can't do it no one can.
Sean: I'm a hedgehog.
Octavia: *slices my hand off*
Sean: aah! *hits Octavia*
Octavia: Easy! I might have to kill you.
arco iris Dash: Kill Sean the hedgehog, and you'll have to kill me.
Rarity: Kill arco iris Dash then tu have to kill me
Pinkie Pie: Kill Rarity, and you'll have to go through us.
Applejack: Kill aguardiente de manzana, applejack & Gummie, then tu have to kill me.
Fenix: The german army is here.
Octavia: Fine. I surrender.

And so we locked up Octavia & her entire team. Then we found the treasure, it was worth over 100,000 bits. But then.

Octavia: *gets on boat*
Pinkie Pie: What are tu doing?
Octavia: Stealing all your treasure.
Pinkie Pie: How'd tu get out?
Octavia: Magic.
Twilight: I freed her. But now, I have to finish what I've started *Kills Octavia*
Pinkie Pie: tu were on my side after all.
Twilight: No I'm not. I only killed her, because she failed.
Pinkie Pie: tu died earlier.
Twilight: Rarity brought me back to life, thinking I changed my ways.
Pinkie Pie: I don't know why you're going against me though.
Twilight: I need that money más then tu do. I am a princess after all.
Pinkie Pie: Is that what this is all about? tu being a princess?
Twilight: I deserve it más then tu do.
Pinkie Pie: Ok then *K.O's Twilight*
Sean: What are tu going to do now?
Pinkie Pie: Put her back in jail.
Sean: She'll get out again.
Pinkie Pie: No she won't trust me.

The siguiente día Twilight woke up to find that she was no longer an alicorn, and could no longer be a princess. She fucked up big time, but learned her lesson. Despite this, things were going to get worse for her, but that's another story.

The End.
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