This is a misceláneo story I made up about 10 segundos ago. Enjoy!

"Come on, Edward. It wouldn't hurt to get a puppy!" I pleaded with him. But I only got a roll of the eyes for an answer.
"Bella. We have been over this a thousand. No, close to a million times. No pets." I stared at him, and then tried a different approch.
"You dicho tu would do anything to make me happy. A perrito, cachorro will make me happy."
"No, Bella."
"Please!" I whined.
"For the last time, no. Case closed."
Great. Now I had to play the break-up card.
"If tu don't let me get a puppy, I...will tortazo the crap out of you, and then leave. For good." I knew smacking wouldn't do any harm, but it was worth a shot.
"Bella." He said, shock in his voice.
"Before you, my life was a-"
"Moonless night. Then I shot across your sky, and tu were dazed por me. Then when tu left, your eyes were blinded my me. Yada, yada, yada. Cut the crap, Edward." He stared at me, shocked. He then leaned toward me.
"If tu will promise to stay with me, I will get tu a puppy. Okay?" His cool breath tickled my neck.
"'Kay. tu have a deal. Can I ask tu a favor?"
"What?"
But instead of giving him an explination, I threw my arms around his neck and pulled his lips to mine. He seemed into it for about 20 seconds, and then he turned to stone under my touch.
"How about tu get that perrito, cachorro tu wanted." He murmured.
"Okay." I dicho breathlessly. Time for plan A.

* * *
"Jake! tu can come out now!" I shouted. He came up with this plan, and I sure as hell hoped it worked. Jake's russet brown body slid out of the trees, and he whined.
"Remember. This was your idea to be part of the family. So, tu are going to do it, o else."
He cocked his head to the side.
"I will never come down to La Push, and I will never, ever, talk to tu again. Got it?" I asked. He walked up to me, and put his large head in my hand.
"Now, we just need a leash, and we will be covered." I whispered.
We got the leash, and Jacob looked quite unhappy in human form with a leash around his neck.
"Bella. I look like a freaking idiot."
"Then go back in wolfie form." I teased. He stared at me.
"Bella, being your pet dog is going to be the best ever. But don't call me "wolfie." Makes me sound stupid."
"You are stupid." I muttered under my breath.
We were standing in front of my house now, and I poked Jake.
"Ok. Take off the leash, then phase. Then, I will put the leash pack on for you, since tu don't have opposable thumbs. Got it?" I asked. He yanked the leash off of his neck, and stomped off toward the trees. He then trotted out in lobo form.
"I hope this works." I dicho as I put the leash on his neck. I yanked it into palce, and pulled him along.

* * *
"Bella! Why the heck is Jacob on a leash?!" Edward yelled.
"This isn't Jacob. It's a Saint Bernard." I argued.
Like I thought, Edward was furious.
"I dicho I would get tu a dog." He hissed. Not a werewolf." Jacob snarled at Edward.
"But Jacob is a dog." I protested.
"A mutant dog that is taller than a horse and really needs a haircut." He muttered. Jacob skittrerd outside, and came back in, but in human form.
"Number one. I do not need a haircut. Number two. I am only about 7 inches taller than a horse. Number three, I am not a mutant!" Jacob yelled.
"Bella." Edward sighed my name. I turned my head in his direction.
"Why couldn't tu have just gotten a chihuahua?"