Damon's funny frases

Damon poured himself a glass of borbón and drank it out. He spit it out.
“Yeah, I put vervain in all your drinks” a familiar voice said. Damon turned around and saw Katherine standing in the doorway of the living room. “I told tu tu had to drink vervain again. I thought Elena would’ve convinced tu por now”
Damon looked away.
“That’s right. Trouble in paradise” Katherine said. “If I were tu I’d try really hard to make things okay. We don’t want her to run back to Stefan, do we?”
Damon looked up angry. “She wouldn’t do that. Elena isn’t like that. I just…need to...

Damon was born in the 15th century in Florence, Italy. It is assumed that he is the oldest son of Giuseppe di Salvatore, a Conte (count). Some years later (an exact number isn't provided), his brother Stefan was born. Damon and Stefan's mother fell ill and died a few years after that. Allegedly, he blames his little brother for her death and has never forgiven him (it seems likely, but the reader has only Stefan's suspicion that this is so, as Damon himself never suggests anything of the sort).

Damon was sent to a universidad as an adult but wasted all of his time there gambling, hawking, and...