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1.    Kobalt Tools taught me that tu can’t kill a Kobalt.
2.    Home Depot taught me that the power of the inicial Depot is más saving and más doing.
3.    Burger King taught me to have it my way.
4.    Tony the Tiger taught me that Frosted Flakes are más than good, they’re great!
5.    Nike taught me to just do it.
6.    Disneyland taught me that it’s the happiest place on Earth.
7.    McDonald’s taught me that I’m loving it.
8.    Sprite taught me to obey my thirst.
9.    LG taught me that life’s good.
10.    Apple taught me that everything’s easier on a Mac.
11.    Pillsbury taught me that nothing says loving like something in the oven.
12.    State Farm taught me that like a good neighbor, it’s there.
13.    Geico taught me that it’s so easy, a caveman could do it.
14.    Taco campana taught me to think outside the bun.
15.    Apple taught me to think different.
16.    Trix cereal taught me that Trix are for kids.
17.    Folgers taught me that the best part of waking up is the Folgers in your cup.
18.    Skittles taught me to taste the rainbow.
19.    Lucky Charms taught me that they are magically delicious.
20.    Tootsie Pops taught me that the world may never know how many licks it takes to get to its center.
21.     Toucan Sam taught me to follow your nose for the fruity taste that shows.
22.    Toyota taught me to mover forward.
23.    eBay taught me to buy it, sell it, and amor it.
24.    Subway taught me to eat fresh.
added by Manicliker123
MARY HAD A LITLE LMB LITLE LMB LITLE LMB MARY HAD A LITL3 LMB WHOSE FLECE WAS WHIET AS SNOW
SNG1!!1!11 WTF A SONG OF SIXPENC3 A POK3T FUL OF RY3!1!! OMG lol FOUR AND TWENTY BLAKBIRDS BAEKD IN A PEI1!!!11 OMG WTF lol WHAN TEH PEI WAS OP3NED DA BIRDS BGAON 2 SNG1!1!11 lol WASNT TAHT A DANETY DISH 2 SET BFORA DA KNG
TWINKLE???!???? lol TWINKLA LITL3 STAR1!!!!1 WTF lol HOW I WONDAR WUT U AER1!!11! OMG UP ABOV3 TEH WORLD SO HIGH1!!1 WTF lol LIEK A DIMOND IN DA SKY1!11 TWINKL3 TWINKLE LITLA STAR!!11 OMG HOW I WONDER WUT U AER111!




i could barely read this and again this is from the internet<33
posted by EllentheStrange
Feel free to use them
1.Your mom
2.Dick
3.Eat it bitch
4.That's what she said
5. The future is bulletproof and the aftermath is secondary
6.Forshizz
7.Holy cannibal cupcake!
8.IDEK
9.Hey ho,let's go!
10.In Soviet Russia,the oso, oso de wrestles you
11.Chuck Norris was here
12.Apple cake
13.Bloody bastards!
14.Ya know,I was welcomed to the black parade
15.Take my fucking hand and suck my thumb
16.Eat the children raw
17.RAWR means I amor tu in Italian
18.I will carry on with the black parade
19.So long and goodnight
20.Ya know,I live life on the murder scene
Things Guys Should Know About Girls

1. Don’t ever lie to us; we always find out.
2. We don’t enjoy talking dirty to tu as much as you
enjoy listening.
3. Don’t say tu understand when tu don’t.
4. Girls are pretty, but yours is the Prettiest!
5. tu don’t have PMS; don’t act like tu know what it’s
like.
6. Saying something sweet might get tu off the hook;
doing something sweet will always get tu off the hook.
7. If tu talk about having a big dick; we know tu don’t.
8. Size does matter, but only to hoes; not girls that
want relationships.
9. We don’t like it when tu act like Mr....
continue reading...
posted by jessicamc26
The Engineer

An engineer dies and reports to hell.

Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements.

After a while, they've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy.

One día God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell?"

Satan replies, "Hey things are going great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."

God replies, "What??? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake -- he should never have gotten down there; send him up here."

Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him."

God says, "Send him back up here o I'll sue."

Satan laughs uproariously and answers, "Yeah, right. And just where are tu going to get a lawyer?"
posted by Jeffersonian
A teacher forwarded this lista of comentarios from test papers, essays, etc., publicado to science and health teachers por elementary, junior high, high school, and college students. As she noted, It is truly astonishing what weird science our young scholars can create under the pressures of time and grades.

The body consists of three parts - the branium, the borax, and the abominable cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the corazón and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowels, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u.
Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it...
continue reading...
1 when they ask u what your name is, make a name up (like hello kitty o santino marella. o even better, if youre a girl make up a guys vice versa for da guys)

2 when they ask u what insturment u play, make up a name for your insturment

3 when u have to introduce that person, mess up, like say a stupid name and a wierd insturment they play. then explain that's what tu heard when they explained it 2 you

4 wear a camisa, camiseta over your uniform that makes the other teams band members offended.

5 hug them, and place a beetle INSIDE their uniform

6 bring along your little Brother/sister (if u dont hav one...
continue reading...
posted by cheeeese
yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyy
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Return the slab o suffer my curse
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