David Cage, the creator of many famous games of the reciente era. A man who is dicho to be one of the most creative minds in gaming right now. And yet, no matter who tu ask, there is only two opinions on this guy. There’s the people who like David Cage and then there are the people who don’t. And I’m one of the people who don’t. Welcome to an episode of Content Cuck. And this is the David Cage and Quantic Dream rant article. I’m here to discuss all the flaws of every Quantic Dream game, yes, all five of them, and talk about the flaws of David Cage, from the self centered behavior to the creepy attitude to the borderline slavery of his company. All right here for your lectura pleasure. I don’t expect to change any minds on this. But I want to give my reasons as to why I cannot stand David Cage o any of his games. Let’s start from the top
Chapter I - The Nomad Hole
Now, despite the fact that Omikron: The Nomad Soul has música por David Bowie himself, as well as David Bowie playing a major character in the game, even he could not save this mess. A game that was considered an underrated classic por those that did play it… have tu seen this game as of lately. Really ugly environments, bland settings, a jumbled mess of a plot, and just a bunch of bad gameplay mecaniques ranging from a busted fighting mini-game to atrocious first person shooting sequences, all rolled up to this shlock shit of a game. tu could argue that this is all just limitations with the hardware and money, but this was released in the same año as Final fantasía 8, Tony Hawk Pro Skater, Resident Evil 3, Silent Hill, and Shenmue. And it can’t be a money problem because David Bowie! This is a game that has very little to talk about because there is surprisingly very little to talk about. This is just a very sloppy start to David Cage’s…….. Legacy, and no one, not even the biggest Quantic Dream fans, like, all four of them, care to play it. I will say this, after David Bowie’s death, David Cage wanted people to play this game to remember him by. tu can call it whatever tu want, but I call that really petty.
Chapter II - violeta Legacy Or: Temperature
Here we are, the first game that got Quantic Dream some publicity and a game that David Cage was so proud of that he mocapped himself into the game…. I’m not kidding.
So Indigo Prophecy, o Fahrenheit if tu live in the UK, was a step in the right direction. As much a step in the right direction as moving from a cliff and instead into oncoming traffic. What I’m trying to say is that this game was better than Omikron, but only better than Omikron. A plot that is really dumb with a ton of dumb moments like characters walking around in below freezing temperatures and a really, REALLY bad flashback sequence that requires tu to keep moving and not get caught, o else tu gotta do the entire thing again. This is also where we can spot a majority of David Cage’s many tropes, such as long ducha, ducha de scenes, the police and the army are terrible people, friendly homeless people who are basically jesus, massive apartments to symbolism happiness but emptiness, oh, and a lot of scenes where girls, usually ones with short hair, are almost raped. Like, this happens a lot, especially in games we’ll get to later. This is also the game where David Cage first gave his infamous quote, “Game overs are a failure of the game designer”. It is infamous because not only does it make David Cage seem like he’s so far up his own culo that you’d think his brain was mistaken for his colon, but it would also prove that he is a hypocrite, as Indigo Prophecy does have gameovers, like failing the flashback sequence, o getting attacked por giant bugs in an office, also, yes, really, that happens. It makes tu think that David Cage just says shit in order to sound smarter than he really is. But that couldn’t be the case, right? No, I don’t think so. But don’t worry, it’s all downhill from here
Chapter III - The Heaviest Rain
Now we’re getting to games that I actually know and actually hate. At the time this game wa made, I was debating with myself whether this was worse than Indigo Prophecy. It had a far más interesting plot, but tropes, writing, and everything else made me hate this game even more. Let’s get the Jason out of the way, the voice actuación for characters, especially for the main characters character, because of course the main character has the worst, he sounds más robotic than the characters in a future David Cage game. I will say that this game, while being terrible in every way, makes this the funniest game to play with friends. Discuss how much of an idiot Jason is and how much of a depressing loser Ethan is while failing prompts because despite it all there, tu rarely if ever fail. That being said, this game has a multitude of problems with it’s writing. It can have it’s great moments, like when Ethan cuts off his finger, which I will say is actually pretty good, but then it can have other moments, like the sex scene. A sex scene that involves Ethan. A sex scene that happens as his son is drowning and going to die at any second. But no, this is más important. Oh, and of course, the girl was almost raped… twice, right before this scene. But I guess to David Cage, a man who lacks human emotions, he would say that sex makes everything better, even a dying child and attempted rape. And then there is the scene with the reveal of the Origami Killer. I won’t say who it is, because as much as I hate this game, it would still be a shitty thing to do to just spoil it for everyone. What I can say is that how it hides the fact that it is bad is just awful. The game actively lies to your face in order to hide the killer’s identity. The game psyches tu out in one scene and tu are told to remember that. What I remember is that it makes no sense so I am just being told that this game is flatout bullshitting me just to have this twist ending. Is the twist good? Hell no it’s not, what were tu expecting. At the time of Heavy Rain’s release, I thought it couldn’t get any worse. I thought David Cage really out did himself with this disasterpiece. And then… He got Ellen Page.
Chapter IV - Beyond
This was the game that broke me. This was the game that finally made me realize just how much of a hack David Cage was. But when tu look into the behind the scenes, things get even worse. But let’s stick to this masterpiece of a game on it’s own for now. So, Ellen Page and Willem Dafoe. I don’t know how tu two got roped into this shit, but let’s try to break down everything in this game that is terrible. The plot twist with Aiden and Jodie is the worst thing I’ve ever seen in my life. The plot with the Native Americans and the sand demon’s is really stupid and their curse makes no sense. The fact that David Cage ripped off the Microwave Tunnel from Metal Gear Solid 4, the most powerful part of that entire game, just for a really dumb moment. The ending morale of, “If tu miss your loved ones, kill yourself to see them again”. The mess of the plot, where it always jumps from one time to another. One moment, Jodie’s a little kid, than a young adult, than a pre teen, than in the army, than at a birthday party, then getting raped in the bar, then back to happy kid fun times. This structure is really bad. And we aren’t even done yet! The game tells tu tu amor one man even if tu try to sabotage everything about him. The game forcing tu to pick this one choice no matter what. Willem Dafoe, one of the greatest actors of our time, pushed to the sidelines for most of the game. The awful, disgusting use of David Cage’s own fictional afterlife to honor the loss of one of their coworkers. And this is just stuff tu can find in the game. When we go behind the scenes, we can find stuff that is even más horrifying and shocking about David Cage and Beyond: Two Souls
Other than this wonderful image of Ellen Page and Willem Dafoe looking fucking miserable and afraid, we got some más shit. Like how a majority of the creepy groping scenes done por grown men toward Ellen Page’s character Jodie were all mocapped por David himself. o how there was a scene where Jodie is in the ducha, ducha de and they had a real nude model of Jodie, which went against Ellen Page’s nonude rules. How Jodie is almost always forced to sleep with guys before Aiden stops them. But then there is the scene where David Cage has Jodie dressed up in a small camisa, camiseta and short falda with stockings and boots. Oh, and short black hair, because that’s the way David likes ‘em. She almost gets raped in a bar, but Aiden saves her just in time. HOWEVER, there is cut audio for this game where it is implied Jodie can get raped and Aiden can just sit there and do nothing. And this, mixed with the fact that Jodie is only dressed like this for this one scene, just makes me feel dirty to think about it. Like David Cage wanted this scene to happen. It gets to a point where it goes from having your interests in a woman be a driving point to create your character and just mostrando off your creepy fetish to the whole world. Beyond: Two Souls is a straight up mess and not a good game. But that didn’t stop the world from getting hyped for his siguiente game. Everyone was talking about it after the short film, Kara, and everyone was getting excited. Nothing could stop Quantic Dream now
Uh-oh, Spaghettios. Looks like Davey got himself into más trouble. Only a few months before their siguiente big game was to be released, in January 2018, Quantic Dreams got into trouble after their studio had been discovered to be doing shady business practices, like overworking their employees, to even sexually harassing some people who were working on the game. And to add fuel to the fire, on April of the same year, Quantic Dreams decided to sue the French media for what they called slander. But the damage was already done and Quantic Dreams was seen as no better than companies like EA… Okay, maybe that’s a big stretch, but tu get the point. Quantic Dreams was in hot water. Their game needed to be a major success o else. And was their siguiente game a huge hit… Well, it’s Quantic Dream, so yes.
Chapter V - Tag! You're Emancipated
Despite all the shit talking I’ve made towards David Cage and Quantic Dream, and despite how much I’ve built up just straight up shitting all over this game… I kinda like Detroit: Become Human, if only for a few reasons. First off, the voice actors. Unlike before, where the voice actuación was stilted o tu had one o two good actors in a sea of ones that were poorly directed, here, they did their best with what they had, o in the case of Connor and Hank, they just said, “Fuck the script” and did their own thing, resulting in some of the best dialogue to ever grace a Quantic Dream game, whether Cage wanted to hear it o not. The world building was also far más decent and believable. The world was beautiful, even the shittiest parts of it. This does take place in Detroit after all. And the score is amazing. That’s not to say the game is perfect though. Markus’ character makes him out to be a wet blanket and he barely holds up the revolution plot, and his relationship with North is so fucking forced. If tu were like me and pushing her away and disagreeing with her at every chance, tu will find the sudden instant where she jumps from Neutral to Lover in five minutos baffling. Kara’s plot just drags on with no real ompf to it. But once tu get to the near end game and find out the plot twist, not only does it make her story insufferable, but it makes her entire story from the beginning utterly pointless and I hate it. And I hate to say it, but even Connor can’t save himself from David Cage, because a majority of this games endings has the whole, “This is everything we wanted” shit and it’s so dumb. I won’t spoil it por going into detail, but trust me, expect to see it in almost every ending. And then there’s the whole forced allegory of racism and forcing famous lines down your throat like “I have a dream” and such. Kinda funny how Quantic Dream of all people can make a game that symbolizes slavery. But Detroit was the game that made me want to make this article. Because as I played it, I realized something. Despite the garbage that this game has, everyone did an amazing job. The voice actors, the musicians, the designers, artists, mocap actors. Everyone brought their a-game and did their best. Everyone… except David Cage!
Chapter VI - David Uncaged
The problem with David Cage is that nobody wants to tell him to stop. He has the control to write whatever he wants into his game and make any dumb twist, stupid trope, o terrible allegory without pregunta from the staff. David Cage is a man who, from what I’ve seen, I don’t know him personally, sees no flaws in his writing, no errors. He believes that his escritura is perfect the way it is. He believes his direction of actors and crew is perfectly fine. He makes games like they are movies, but fails to realize that they are not cine at all. But even if they were, then all he would make are badly written films. It would be no different to what he does now, just minus the heavy use of button prompts. David Cage is what is holding back the team of Quantic Dreams. His blind arrogance, his bad writing, his bordering creepy fantasies, and his lack to attempt to better himself blind him from seeing his own flaws and he does whatever he chooses because he believes he can do no wrong. And how could he, when he scares his whole crew into doing what he wants them to. Here’s some consejos for you, Cage, but I doubt you’ll hear it from atop your high horse. There is always room for improvement, and tu could use a ton of it. If tu aren’t going to put in the effort to try and make your games más well written and más interesting, and challenge yourself to do better, than why should I be bothered to take any of your games seriously?
PFFFF! But what do I know?! I’m just some guy on the interwebs. I didn’t make twenty different Let’s Plays o livestreams of myself doing everything in Detroit because I felt fucked to.
Chapter I - The Nomad Hole
Now, despite the fact that Omikron: The Nomad Soul has música por David Bowie himself, as well as David Bowie playing a major character in the game, even he could not save this mess. A game that was considered an underrated classic por those that did play it… have tu seen this game as of lately. Really ugly environments, bland settings, a jumbled mess of a plot, and just a bunch of bad gameplay mecaniques ranging from a busted fighting mini-game to atrocious first person shooting sequences, all rolled up to this shlock shit of a game. tu could argue that this is all just limitations with the hardware and money, but this was released in the same año as Final fantasía 8, Tony Hawk Pro Skater, Resident Evil 3, Silent Hill, and Shenmue. And it can’t be a money problem because David Bowie! This is a game that has very little to talk about because there is surprisingly very little to talk about. This is just a very sloppy start to David Cage’s…….. Legacy, and no one, not even the biggest Quantic Dream fans, like, all four of them, care to play it. I will say this, after David Bowie’s death, David Cage wanted people to play this game to remember him by. tu can call it whatever tu want, but I call that really petty.
Chapter II - violeta Legacy Or: Temperature
Here we are, the first game that got Quantic Dream some publicity and a game that David Cage was so proud of that he mocapped himself into the game…. I’m not kidding.
So Indigo Prophecy, o Fahrenheit if tu live in the UK, was a step in the right direction. As much a step in the right direction as moving from a cliff and instead into oncoming traffic. What I’m trying to say is that this game was better than Omikron, but only better than Omikron. A plot that is really dumb with a ton of dumb moments like characters walking around in below freezing temperatures and a really, REALLY bad flashback sequence that requires tu to keep moving and not get caught, o else tu gotta do the entire thing again. This is also where we can spot a majority of David Cage’s many tropes, such as long ducha, ducha de scenes, the police and the army are terrible people, friendly homeless people who are basically jesus, massive apartments to symbolism happiness but emptiness, oh, and a lot of scenes where girls, usually ones with short hair, are almost raped. Like, this happens a lot, especially in games we’ll get to later. This is also the game where David Cage first gave his infamous quote, “Game overs are a failure of the game designer”. It is infamous because not only does it make David Cage seem like he’s so far up his own culo that you’d think his brain was mistaken for his colon, but it would also prove that he is a hypocrite, as Indigo Prophecy does have gameovers, like failing the flashback sequence, o getting attacked por giant bugs in an office, also, yes, really, that happens. It makes tu think that David Cage just says shit in order to sound smarter than he really is. But that couldn’t be the case, right? No, I don’t think so. But don’t worry, it’s all downhill from here
Chapter III - The Heaviest Rain
Now we’re getting to games that I actually know and actually hate. At the time this game wa made, I was debating with myself whether this was worse than Indigo Prophecy. It had a far más interesting plot, but tropes, writing, and everything else made me hate this game even more. Let’s get the Jason out of the way, the voice actuación for characters, especially for the main characters character, because of course the main character has the worst, he sounds más robotic than the characters in a future David Cage game. I will say that this game, while being terrible in every way, makes this the funniest game to play with friends. Discuss how much of an idiot Jason is and how much of a depressing loser Ethan is while failing prompts because despite it all there, tu rarely if ever fail. That being said, this game has a multitude of problems with it’s writing. It can have it’s great moments, like when Ethan cuts off his finger, which I will say is actually pretty good, but then it can have other moments, like the sex scene. A sex scene that involves Ethan. A sex scene that happens as his son is drowning and going to die at any second. But no, this is más important. Oh, and of course, the girl was almost raped… twice, right before this scene. But I guess to David Cage, a man who lacks human emotions, he would say that sex makes everything better, even a dying child and attempted rape. And then there is the scene with the reveal of the Origami Killer. I won’t say who it is, because as much as I hate this game, it would still be a shitty thing to do to just spoil it for everyone. What I can say is that how it hides the fact that it is bad is just awful. The game actively lies to your face in order to hide the killer’s identity. The game psyches tu out in one scene and tu are told to remember that. What I remember is that it makes no sense so I am just being told that this game is flatout bullshitting me just to have this twist ending. Is the twist good? Hell no it’s not, what were tu expecting. At the time of Heavy Rain’s release, I thought it couldn’t get any worse. I thought David Cage really out did himself with this disasterpiece. And then… He got Ellen Page.
Chapter IV - Beyond
This was the game that broke me. This was the game that finally made me realize just how much of a hack David Cage was. But when tu look into the behind the scenes, things get even worse. But let’s stick to this masterpiece of a game on it’s own for now. So, Ellen Page and Willem Dafoe. I don’t know how tu two got roped into this shit, but let’s try to break down everything in this game that is terrible. The plot twist with Aiden and Jodie is the worst thing I’ve ever seen in my life. The plot with the Native Americans and the sand demon’s is really stupid and their curse makes no sense. The fact that David Cage ripped off the Microwave Tunnel from Metal Gear Solid 4, the most powerful part of that entire game, just for a really dumb moment. The ending morale of, “If tu miss your loved ones, kill yourself to see them again”. The mess of the plot, where it always jumps from one time to another. One moment, Jodie’s a little kid, than a young adult, than a pre teen, than in the army, than at a birthday party, then getting raped in the bar, then back to happy kid fun times. This structure is really bad. And we aren’t even done yet! The game tells tu tu amor one man even if tu try to sabotage everything about him. The game forcing tu to pick this one choice no matter what. Willem Dafoe, one of the greatest actors of our time, pushed to the sidelines for most of the game. The awful, disgusting use of David Cage’s own fictional afterlife to honor the loss of one of their coworkers. And this is just stuff tu can find in the game. When we go behind the scenes, we can find stuff that is even más horrifying and shocking about David Cage and Beyond: Two Souls
Other than this wonderful image of Ellen Page and Willem Dafoe looking fucking miserable and afraid, we got some más shit. Like how a majority of the creepy groping scenes done por grown men toward Ellen Page’s character Jodie were all mocapped por David himself. o how there was a scene where Jodie is in the ducha, ducha de and they had a real nude model of Jodie, which went against Ellen Page’s nonude rules. How Jodie is almost always forced to sleep with guys before Aiden stops them. But then there is the scene where David Cage has Jodie dressed up in a small camisa, camiseta and short falda with stockings and boots. Oh, and short black hair, because that’s the way David likes ‘em. She almost gets raped in a bar, but Aiden saves her just in time. HOWEVER, there is cut audio for this game where it is implied Jodie can get raped and Aiden can just sit there and do nothing. And this, mixed with the fact that Jodie is only dressed like this for this one scene, just makes me feel dirty to think about it. Like David Cage wanted this scene to happen. It gets to a point where it goes from having your interests in a woman be a driving point to create your character and just mostrando off your creepy fetish to the whole world. Beyond: Two Souls is a straight up mess and not a good game. But that didn’t stop the world from getting hyped for his siguiente game. Everyone was talking about it after the short film, Kara, and everyone was getting excited. Nothing could stop Quantic Dream now
Uh-oh, Spaghettios. Looks like Davey got himself into más trouble. Only a few months before their siguiente big game was to be released, in January 2018, Quantic Dreams got into trouble after their studio had been discovered to be doing shady business practices, like overworking their employees, to even sexually harassing some people who were working on the game. And to add fuel to the fire, on April of the same year, Quantic Dreams decided to sue the French media for what they called slander. But the damage was already done and Quantic Dreams was seen as no better than companies like EA… Okay, maybe that’s a big stretch, but tu get the point. Quantic Dreams was in hot water. Their game needed to be a major success o else. And was their siguiente game a huge hit… Well, it’s Quantic Dream, so yes.
Chapter V - Tag! You're Emancipated
Despite all the shit talking I’ve made towards David Cage and Quantic Dream, and despite how much I’ve built up just straight up shitting all over this game… I kinda like Detroit: Become Human, if only for a few reasons. First off, the voice actors. Unlike before, where the voice actuación was stilted o tu had one o two good actors in a sea of ones that were poorly directed, here, they did their best with what they had, o in the case of Connor and Hank, they just said, “Fuck the script” and did their own thing, resulting in some of the best dialogue to ever grace a Quantic Dream game, whether Cage wanted to hear it o not. The world building was also far más decent and believable. The world was beautiful, even the shittiest parts of it. This does take place in Detroit after all. And the score is amazing. That’s not to say the game is perfect though. Markus’ character makes him out to be a wet blanket and he barely holds up the revolution plot, and his relationship with North is so fucking forced. If tu were like me and pushing her away and disagreeing with her at every chance, tu will find the sudden instant where she jumps from Neutral to Lover in five minutos baffling. Kara’s plot just drags on with no real ompf to it. But once tu get to the near end game and find out the plot twist, not only does it make her story insufferable, but it makes her entire story from the beginning utterly pointless and I hate it. And I hate to say it, but even Connor can’t save himself from David Cage, because a majority of this games endings has the whole, “This is everything we wanted” shit and it’s so dumb. I won’t spoil it por going into detail, but trust me, expect to see it in almost every ending. And then there’s the whole forced allegory of racism and forcing famous lines down your throat like “I have a dream” and such. Kinda funny how Quantic Dream of all people can make a game that symbolizes slavery. But Detroit was the game that made me want to make this article. Because as I played it, I realized something. Despite the garbage that this game has, everyone did an amazing job. The voice actors, the musicians, the designers, artists, mocap actors. Everyone brought their a-game and did their best. Everyone… except David Cage!
Chapter VI - David Uncaged
The problem with David Cage is that nobody wants to tell him to stop. He has the control to write whatever he wants into his game and make any dumb twist, stupid trope, o terrible allegory without pregunta from the staff. David Cage is a man who, from what I’ve seen, I don’t know him personally, sees no flaws in his writing, no errors. He believes that his escritura is perfect the way it is. He believes his direction of actors and crew is perfectly fine. He makes games like they are movies, but fails to realize that they are not cine at all. But even if they were, then all he would make are badly written films. It would be no different to what he does now, just minus the heavy use of button prompts. David Cage is what is holding back the team of Quantic Dreams. His blind arrogance, his bad writing, his bordering creepy fantasies, and his lack to attempt to better himself blind him from seeing his own flaws and he does whatever he chooses because he believes he can do no wrong. And how could he, when he scares his whole crew into doing what he wants them to. Here’s some consejos for you, Cage, but I doubt you’ll hear it from atop your high horse. There is always room for improvement, and tu could use a ton of it. If tu aren’t going to put in the effort to try and make your games más well written and más interesting, and challenge yourself to do better, than why should I be bothered to take any of your games seriously?
PFFFF! But what do I know?! I’m just some guy on the interwebs. I didn’t make twenty different Let’s Plays o livestreams of myself doing everything in Detroit because I felt fucked to.
