1. I wish tu were a door so I could slam tu all day.

2. Nice legs...what time do they open?

3. Do tu work for UPS? I thought I saw tu checking out my package.

4. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?

5. Can I buy tu a drink o do tu just want the money?

6. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

7. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted cama Thrasher: have tu seen one?

8. I'm fighting the urge to make tu the happiest woman on earth tonight.

9. Want to play army? I'll lay down and tu can blow the hell outta me.

10. I wish tu were a poni, pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride tu all día long for a quarter.

11. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.

12. I'd really like to see how tu look when I'm naked.

13. Is that a ladder in your stockings o the stairway to heaven?

14. tu might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

15. Are those real?

16. tu must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.

17. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing tu do with your tongue.

18. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be tu por morning.

19. (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.

20. tu know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.

21. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?

2 2. F@# me if I'm wrong, but is your name jerez Titsbottom?

23. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.

24. My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.

25. Do tu believe in amor at first sight o should I walk por again?

26. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone dicho tu were looking for me.

27. My friend wants to know if tu think I'M cute.

28. Hi. The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.

29. My name isn't Elmo, but tu can tickle me anytime tu want to.

30. I know leche does a body good, but DAMN, how much have tu been drinking?

31. If tu were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.

32. Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why? Don't tu like pizza?

33. Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go inicial without me.

34. Do tu sleep on your stomach? Can I???

35. Do tu wash your pants in Windex? Because I can see myself in them.

36. I lost my puppy. Can tu help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.

37. (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get tu out of these wet clothes.

By: link