Yes, of course. Just because they have struggled, and felt the need to harm themselves, doesn't make them any less worthy of love/affection. If anything, they may need it more. I wouldn't only go out with them, I'd do everything I could to try and help them, and just be there for them. Because I know what it's like to self harm, and how much tu struggle, and how much tu fall down, and I know how hard it is to not have someone to pick tu back up. There is no doubt in my mind, that I would fecha someone who self harmed.
posted hace más de un año
They are not less worthy no, but like many other issues, tu will have to deal with the pain it may cause "you" - my experience. i'll be friends with people but my dating criteria is different.
^The thing is, I have no problems with the pain it causes, I'm rather used to it. And I'd honestly be happier being with someone who self harms, then being friend
I have nothing against people themselves, just "the act" and I am not saying I am better-than, I understand cutting and how it begins and why it remains but I found out my ex was emo and cut and I have enough to deal with in my life - I do not mind someone with similar backgrounds/feelings o similar issues to my own as long as we can co-exist and it be in a semi-postive way that is okay, but I do not want emotional baggage and I do not want to deal with someone else's. I would rather us be willing to work on and heal. To me, if tu are cutting, tu have a way to go and I am not there. I worked hard and for years to get over my divorce, (not a cutter-but that left a scar, I have had enough "emotional" scars to heal from), a lifetime to deal with messed up family stuff, and self-harm I did enough of in other ways in the past so it is not what I want to see someone do to themselves! Not at all! It isn't cool, I don't think it is interesting o romantic, no más than any other messed up coping skill. Like I said, I have enough in my life that I deal with o have and things not cool. I want to fecha más emotionally fit and healthy as possible who is as relationship/romantically capable as possible. No one is perfect, but I do want progress o a fit that is right for me o raise me.
It scars the body & hurts those who care Not suicidal people either, if I know not that I choose-No.
posted hace más de un año
I have to agree with everything tu dicho baby and best answer
Well I would never be put off por someone just because they have scars, especially since I've got some, but I mean as always it depends. I'm not a huge fan of the shallow cut-for-attention kind of person and all that, the kind who cuts just to get noticed~
posted hace más de un año
I think the cut-for-attention people have just as many problems as people who cut from depression and stuff, though. After all, if you're physically harming yourself, just to be noticed, then tu might have a serious depressive/mental disorder yourself.
Erm... Ok. I'm going to get absolutely torn up for this answer but here it is: I understand that they have problems too, I'm not denying that, but I have found that a certain kind of shallowness comes along with cutting o attention. (Note this is from personal experience and in general - I know it's not the case for all.) The people I've known and liked (as friends o as more) who have cut haven't been for attention; they've been más other kinds of problems, and they don't flaunt their scars and ask for attention with them, whether they suffer from neglect o not. And I don't make friends with stupid people, I don't like to be around people who aren't opinionated and passionate. They're not shallow. They care about a lot más than themselves. Unlike people who cut for attention. So I have a problem mostly with the self-centered immature attitude that often comes along with cutting for attention.
I like what tu said, and whether for attention o not - for sheepish behavior, habit, o deep-set problems, I may amor the person, but not the action, and I agree. I do not want shallow friends period.
I agree with what tu dicho about the ones who do it for attention, and I agree with Hamuko as well. Of course the ones who cut just for attention have problems too, but I definitely see something shallow and self-centered about that.
I'm not sure. I myself am not very stable a person, and in a relationship, I think I'm the one that needs support and all that... I don't think I'd be able to always be there to help someone who does that, because I need help myself. I need someone strong to depend on. If I really loved the person, then sure... I'd try to help them the best I can, and make it work somehow. But I think if someone cuts, we'd most likely just be friends, and I'd try to help them to the best of my ability, as a friend. Uhh... that sounds less mean in my head than it does here.
posted hace más de un año
It doesn't sound mean, it sounds like tu know yourself. tu sound loving and caring and know what would make tu feel más secure and what tu feel capable of. Of course we do the best we can with anything. Many relationships do not work out, but it is good to know ourselves anyway.
I don't think I could, I don't like the idea of dating someone with the same problems as me, it sounds sad. I'm a very quiet shy person, I couldn't talk about this stuff with most people in person, and people who do self harm tend to talk about it alot, and that would be too depressing for me.
Yes but i would try to convince them to stop and do everything i could to try to help them and if they didnt stop after going out with me awhile i would probably have to break up with them because even if i liked them as a person the thought of cutting really disgusts me.