10. Sing “Discovery Channel” por the Bloodhound Gang in your head whenever he is near.
9. Hotwire his Volvo and take it on a joyride.
8. Tell him the relationship he is having with Bella is practically paedophilia and he could be sent to jail for it.
7. Ask how Tanya is.
6. End every argument with “Bite me, Edward.”
5. Call him Romeo both behind his back and to his face.
4. Whenever he complains o argues, reply with “What are tu gonna do Edward? Go to Italy?”
3. Tell him his hair isn’t bronze, it’s ginger, and he should stop denying himself – he’s a ranga.
2. Whenever he leaves a room o says goodbye, get down on your knees and beg him not to go, not again.
And the Number One way to annoy Edward Cullen?
1. Take his silver cell phone and change the ringtone to “Like a Virgin” por Madonna.