Don't get me wrong I seriously amor Jacob but when I saw this on my correo electrónico I recieved I had to mostrar it to tu guys ^.^enjoy cranking up
1.throw a stick and yell to him too fetch it.
2.when he dousnt get it say "what kind of a dog are tu ?"
3. buy him a kitten for his birthday and name it edward.
4. tell him that he needs a haircut then take him to the pet groomers
5.buy him a "bite me" tee-shirt
6.buy him a shock coller and press the button evry time he swears . . .
7.give him a muzzle.
8.go cliff diving without im.
9 wait for him too come save tu when tu start too drown.
10. when he askes why tu didnt just save yourself , say tu didnt know how too do the doggie paddle and ask if he can teach you.
11.when tu get out of the lake insist that tu need cpr.
12.when he leans down too give tu cpr hold your nose and make a crack about him smelling like a wet dog.
14. then push him off.
15.then ask if your seguro and he dousnt have any rabies that tu need too worry about.
16.follow him around canto "who let the perros out who whowhowho"
17.buy him dog treats and a chew toy for his birthday.
18. when he gets mad befin too cry and say that edward would have been más gratefull.
19.ak him why he dousnt glitter in the sun.
20. then wait for him too go too cama and dump glitter glue all over him.
21.when he wakes up the siguiente morning open the window shade to let the sunlight in and clapp your hands saying he sparkles too!
22. ask him if he has fleas.
23.tell him that tu know the *real* reason the la push guys are so close.
24. wink when tu do number 23.
25.tell him too go fetch a el espacio heater.
26. ask him too get tu a coca cola from the fridge and if he dose pat his head and say " good boy"
27. if he dousnt hit him on the nose witha rolled up newspaper.
28. whenever he tries to speak howla t the parte superior, arriba of your lungs.
29.walk behind him for a really long time constantly touching his butt.
30.when he asks what your doing tell him your looking for his tail.
31. compare the number of edward fans too jacob fans.
32. make insinications about the pack having hot homo doggie fun.
33. go into his bathroom and replace his shampoo with flea shampoo.
34.whenever he sais where lobo scream shapeshifer in his ear at the parte superior, arriba of your lungs.
35.tellhim that hes the amor child of remus lupin and sirious black because hes a were lobo and his last name is black.
36.when tu cant find him sing" oh were oh were has my little dog gone"
37.dress up like a vampire for halloween and go trick o treating in la push.
38.tell him that real men sparkle in the sun.
39. bring him over to your house for cena and serve him purina dog food.
40. serve that dog comida in a plastic dog dish.
41.when he gets mad at tu make a sad face por pushing out your lower lip and bulging your lip.
42.when he askes what your doing tell him your trying to do the perrito, cachorro eyes.
43. ask him too kiss you.
44. then push him off and puñetazo, ponche him in the face.
45. then scream and yell about breaking your hand.
46. put up missing dog posters with his name on them.
47. paint his motorcycle hot pink.
48.sneeze and tell him thast tu must be allergic too dogs.
49. sing" i kissed a girl " but change the words too i kissed a wolf.
50.tell him that edward bitt edward and now shes a hungry new born thirsing for his blood.
51.after telling him that lock him and edward up in a room together.
52. video the results of 51.
53.post that video on tu tube.
54. askif edward dazzles him.
55. when he comes over too your house close your toilet seats saying that tu need too be carfull so that he dousnt drink from it.
56.when walking down the calle with him be sure to avoid fuego htdrens.
57.whenever he looks at tu begin too sing mr. bright side.
58.lick your fingers and touch his chest making a sizzling sound.
59.ask him about air bud hiss bff.
60. go into his garaje and steal all of his tools.
61.brush his hair and then complain about his horrible sheding.
62.every time he sais something reply with " sure, sure"
63. buy him a team edward shirt.
64.force him too were it.
65.when he weres it go up to him screaming like a fan girl "ome! me too!" while pointing at his shirt.
66.take breaking adaawn and force him to read edward and bellas honymoon scene.
67.when he gets all mad lean into his ear and whisper " we could do that "
68. then pull away and say "oh, i forgott your with seth right"
69.ask him if he knows the really cute perrito, cachorro off of the charmin comercials.
70. tap him on the sholder constantly with out stoping.
71. when he turns around say " edward won!"
72.when he gets all depressed ask him whats the matter a thousand times.
73. then say " thats right tu just * keep keep bleeding in love*"
74. when he phases steal his pants.
75. tell him that his half-naked bothers you.
76. tell him that tu would rather see edward hald naked.
77. tell him that your a virgo and proud of it.
78. touch his fore head and freak out about how hot he is.
79. tell him that he should go see a doctor for that fever.
80. them take him to see dr. caralisle cullen.
81. then the entire time keep leaning over and whispering "isnt he hot?"
82. wait until he gose to sleep and losd his doorway with cement.
83. ask if hes going to bella and edwards wedding.
84.when he says no ask " why dont tu have anything nice to were?"
85. when he glares at tu pull out a sparkly rosado, rosa collar and say" because i thought tu would need something nice too were."
86.when he has too go too the bathroom bring him outside and point to the ground.
87. when he asks too go back inside shake your head and say " no one likes a doggie who isnt house trained."
88. ask him to do kareoke and hren sing the bella cullen projects " sexy vampire"
89. stop canto the moment tu here edwards name and start talking about how amazing edward is.
90. call him your widdle jacky poo.
91.count the number of things tu can do before he wrips tu too shreds.
92. if he threatens tu tell him that bella dousnt like it when he gets violent.
93. when he glares at tu smile and say "niether would your lover seth"
94. when he growls say we dont want another sam-and-emily incodent do we?
95. when e begins too shake scream " omg! hes having a ciesure!"
96. when he growls again tell him that his growl really isnt that scary.
97. when he phases find a teniss ball and throw it yelling at him too fetch.
98.when he tries to kill tu run over the boundry line and lauph at him.
99. reed #100.
100. ask him what its like too fecha the loch ness monster.
I am not responsible for any,
Ripping/shredding/tearing/beating/bruising/bleeding/general destruction of tu o your property.
hope tu enjoyed it =D