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I never thought I would be doing a lista like this because when I do lists based on looks it's on women. As a straight guy, it's easier for me to rank women than men. However, when I put my mind to something I try my best to come through. I had already done this lista with women and I remember being asked if I would ever do it with men, so here it is. Keep in mind this is all just my personal opinion as a straight guy and it wasn't easy to figure out AT ALL! Please comentario but be polite. Also, always comentario because I worked HARD on this and during a time I had just had laser eye surgery and...
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posted by x-menobsessed26
Jeff Foxworthy is now picking on Michigan.

If tu consider it a sport to gather your comida por drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all día hoping that the comida will swim by, tu might live in Michigan .

If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each año because Pellston is the coldest spot in the nation, tu might live in Michigan .

If your local Dairy queen is closed from November through April, tu might live in Michigan .

If tu instinctively walk like a pingüino, pingüino de for five months out of the year, tu might live in Michigan .

If someone in a store offers...
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posted by vlad_todd_fan
This is A TRUE STORY AND IF tu DON'T PASS THIS ON tu DON'T HAVE A SOUL!!!

My name is Chris,
I am three,
My eyes are swollen..
I cannot see.

I must be stupid,
I must be bad,
What else could have made,
My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better,
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy,
Would still want to hug me.

I can't do a wrong,
I can't speak at all,
Or else I'm locked up,
All día long.

When I'm awake,
I'm all alone,
The house is dark,
My folks aren't home.

When my mommy does come home,
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll just get,
One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car,
My daddy is back,
From Charlie's bar

I hear...
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In the never-ending "Twilight" battle between Team Edward and Team Jacob, we have the results: The vampire -- and the man who plays him -- claims the buzz. Sure, there's been a lot of tough talk about the lobo boy -- aka Jacob Black, aka Taylor Lautner -- wooing affections away from his glittering rival. But, as a brooding Bella knows, it takes a lot to shake one's loyalty to Edward Cullen -- aka Robert Pattinson.

Not that there hasn't been a time when many have strayed: Jacob Black (and Lautner himself) wrangled más searches on Yahoo! than Edward Cullen (and Pattinson) for about three weeks...
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posted by ilovepenguins
I didn't write this!


Sell used bus tickets. Claim they are for half the price.

Get on the bus, grinning widely. As soon as the bus begins to move, burst into song. When tu arrive at the siguiente stop, stop singing. Step off the bus backwards, still grinning widely.

If tu are seated between two passengers, yawn loudly, strech, and put your arms around them.

Greet passengers with a big hug, handshake, smile and say ³Hi, call me Norman²

Put a leash on a friend and walk him/her onto the bus. Insist he/she is a dog and should go for half fare.

When arriving at your stop, do not push the button to...
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50 Fun things to do in a Grocery Store

1. Ask the produce manager if he happens to have any fresh Oompah Loompah fruit.

2. While holding a cantaloupe directly in front of your chest, squeeze it and smile dreamily.

3. Every time tu turn the corner with your shopping cart, shout “Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!”

4. Go up to the manager and tell him o her that you’ve lost your mommy.

5. While waiting in line at the checkout, juggle some lemons.

6. Tiptoe stealthily up and down the aisles – and around corners – with a magnifying glass.

7. While scratching frantically, ask the manager if he o she has anything...
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Well, I opened up my mailbox the other día and pulled out a letter adressed to me from some...person named "Kether Smith". And first thing I thought was "Kether.... that's a weird name!" but I opened up the letter anyway hoping that this "Kether" was a secret admierer o something sending me some money, but insted, the letter dicho (word for word! I'm typing this strait out of the letter!)

Dahlia,
    I know that you’ll want to come looking for me, but don’t. I’m not worth it. tu remember that collar I gave you? That holds some of my power within it, so it’s okay...
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1. tu can do whatever tu damn well please.

2. Shave your legs and the razor is never dull from his face.

3. Not only is your razor not dull, who needs to shave at all now?

4. tu can leave bra and other unmentionables in view.

5. tu can slump around the house in any old thing.

6. tu don't having to think about birth control, calendars o ovulation. Mother Nature can visit whenever she likes.

7. tu can go out and flirt as much as your corazón desires, without a worry in the world.

8. The toilet asiento issue -- need I say more?

9. Free drinks at bars! Men seem to know when you're single and tend to...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
Welcome to The Weakest Link.

Here is a very simple little test comprised of four preguntas to determine the level of your intellect. Your respuestas must be spontaneous and immediate, with no deliberating o wasting time.

And NO CHEATING. On your mark, set....GO!!!

1: tu are competing in a race, and overtake the runner in segundo place.
In which position are tu now?

Answer:

If tu answered that you're now coming first then you're completely wrong. tu overtook the segundo runner and took their place, therefore you're coming second.

For the siguiente pregunta try not to be so dumb.

2 : If tu overtake the last...
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