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posted by boomerlover
5
1.A blonde keeps walking down her drive to her mail box.

She keeps doing this until her neighbour asks her why she is doing that.

The blonde respuestas "My computer keeps telling me that i've got mail"

2.Why did the blond cruzar, cruz the road?

I dont know.

Neither did the blond.

3.A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.

She replied in a huff, "I wish tu guys could get your act together. Just yesterday tu take away my license and then today tu expect me to mostrar it to you."

4.A blonde, brunette and a redhead run to the parte superior, arriba of a burning building. Below,...
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1)At the movies: When tu meet acquaintances/ friends.. .
Stupid Question: Hey, what are tu doing here?
Answer: Don't u know, I sell tickets in black over here.

2)In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
Stupid Question: Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer: No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia. Why don't tu try again?

3)At a funeral: One of the teary eyed people ask...
Stupid Question: Why, why him, of all people.
Answer: Why? Would it rather have been you?

4)At a restaurant: When tu ask the waiter
Stupid Question: Is the "Paneer mantequilla Masala" dish good?...
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My name is Angela, and I'm in amor with Jacob Black.And I have a weird talent. I can appear in places that I dream of and talk to people there!
I'm 16 years old and I go in "Forks High" high school. I met Jacob in one of my dreams, and after I moved in Forks I met him in real life.

Angela's POV
-Hey, anybody there?
Someone walked out from the dark. It's a boy. He was hot..Actually he looked exactly like Jacob Black..Hm.
The boy- Hey! What are tu doing here?!
-I don't know. I just appeared here, and I need help. tu see, I have this talent. What I dream of is actually reality. It's hard to explain....
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posted by blaise_jez
If tu have 3 quarters, 4 dimes, and 4 pennies, tu have $1.19. tu also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar.

The numbers '172' can be found on the back of the U.S. $5 dollar bill in the bushes at the base of the lincoln Memorial.

President Kennedy was the fastest misceláneo speaker in the world with upwards of 350 words per minute.

In the average lifetime, a person will walk the equivalent of 5 times around the equator.

Odontophobia is the fear of teeth.

The 57 on Heinz ketchup bottles represents the number of varieties of pickles the company once...
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posted by miniabby33
10
Things to do when bored.
1 call all of your contacts on your phone
2 walk around your neighborhood and everytime tu see someon say a compleatly misceláneo word like tacos
3 fake play a video game to annoy someone don't forget sound effects
4 dance to every song on the radio
5 walk around a public place with your pants pulled up like a nerd
6 hang out with old friends
7 have a té party like tu did when tu were little
8 write your name n a piece of paper over and over
9 play ding dong ditch
10 act. Like your alseep on a chair in public and scare everyone who comes por except old people


comentario and I will make more
posted by jedigal1990
18
okay i know alot of people are going to get mad at me for this but to bad like tu twilight fans keep saying anything goes on this spot so here it is.
I am so sick and tired of hearing about twilight on spots that don't relate to twilight i mean there is a million spots dedicated to twilight so why not post there i mean i realize this spot is for anything but i searched twilight on this spot and 6 freaking pages came up this is not a twilight spot and believe it o not some people don't like twilight and we shouldn't have to always come across preguntas and videos and fanpicks and pictures...
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Ways to annoy people in Wal-Mart



Hilarious Ways to be annoying!















"Accidentally" get stuck in one of the frozen comida doors. Give people strange looks and see if anyone helps tu out.
Add really funny things to other peoples’ carts and watch them pay for it and see if they notice.
Around navidad time, start caroling. Ask for money from the listeners.
As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"
Ask if tu can buy a shopping cart.
Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
Ask Someone if they know were they sell little babies!...
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1. tu can do whatever tu damn well please.

2. Shave your legs and the razor is never dull from his face.

3. Not only is your razor not dull, who needs to shave at all now?

4. tu can leave bra and other unmentionables in view.

5. tu can slump around the house in any old thing.

6. tu don't having to think about birth control, calendars o ovulation. Mother Nature can visit whenever she likes.

7. tu can go out and flirt as much as your corazón desires, without a worry in the world.

8. The toilet asiento issue -- need I say more?

9. Free drinks at bars! Men seem to know when you're single and tend to...
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Reasons I amor You:

1) The way tu stand por my side


2) The times tu make sure nothing will harm me


3) How tu always find a new way to "WoW" me


4) When I'm sad, tu take the pain away with a joke


5) How tu always look deep into my eyes


6) How tu can make my corazón melt with your soft lips


7) The way tu hold my hand so tight


8) The way tu never let my hands go


8) How tu always watch out for me


9) They way tu make sure I have everything I need


10) How tu always know what to say when I get mad at you


11) When tu buy me things out of the blue


12) How tu say the cutest...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
Cracking an international market is a goal of most growing corporations. It should not be that difficult, yet even the big multi-nationals run into trouble because of language and cultural differences. For example.The name Coco-Cola in China was first rendered as Ke-Kou-Ke-La. Unfortunately, the coca cola company did not discover until after thousands of signs had been printed that the phrase means "Bite The Wax Tadpole" o "Female Horse Stuffed With Wax," depending on the dialect. coca cola then researched 40,000 Chinese characters and found a close phonetic equivalent, "Ko-Kou-Ko-Le," which can be...
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posted by kellyclarkson12
3
My favourite celebridades

1.Michelle Trachtenberg-She is just very cool and acts perfectly in 17 Again and Gossip Girl as Georgina :)))

2.Leighton Meester-She is a wonderful singer,great actress and woman and acts perfectly in Gossip Girl as Blair :)

3.Dreama Walker-She is a wonderful actress in Gossip Girl as Hazel.

4.Kate French-Love her as Nikki Stevens in The l Word :)

5.Rachel Bilson-Can I add more?An amazing woman,perfect actress,wonderful style,amazing way of behaviour and way of life.She is my role model

6.Bethany Joy Galeotti-She is great,acts perfectly as Haley in One árbol Hill,has some great songs and has an amazing character.

7.Maite Perroni-A great woman and a singer!
posted by Shelly_McShelly
5
1. "No stopping o standing." -- A sign at bus stops everywhere.

2. "Do not sit under coconut trees." -- A sign on a coconut palm in a West Palm playa park circa 1950.

3. "These rows reserved for parents with children." -- A sign in a church.

4. "All cups leaving this store, rather full o empty, must be paid for." -- A sign in a Cumberland Farms in Hillsboro, New Hampshire.

5. "Malfunction: Too less water." -- A notice left on a coffee machine.

6. "Prescriptions cannot be filled por phone." -- On a form in a clinic.

7. "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside." -- On a bag of Fritos.

8. "Fits one head." -- On a hotel-provided ducha, ducha de gorra, cap box.

9. "Payment is due por the due date." -- On a credit card statement.

10. "No small children." -- On a laundromat triple washer.

11. "Warning: Ramp Ends In Stairs." -- A sign, correctly describing the end of a concrete ramp intended for handicap access to a bridge.
WELDONE!

YOU HAVE FAILED TO IGNORE THIS MESSAGE TO tu - THE PERSON WHO FAILED!

dear fellow fanpop failures...

i have failed to bring tu the news of fail blog sooner...

some of tu may know but the rest of tu probabley fail to know what im talking about. well fail blog is the brand new fail site. it's stuffed full of posts of your día to día FAILS. it does have the occasional win... there are the most misceláneo posts of failed foto shots of failures publicado por dedicated failed fail-er fail finders some are plain stupid but it won't fail to make tu laugh! tu can take failed pictures your self...
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Supports your body’s antioxidant and nutritional needs.





--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MonaVie™ features a delicious blend of the Brazilian açai berry—one of nature's parte superior, arriba superfoods—and 18 other body-beneficial fruits. This Balance-Variety-Moderation approach to nutrition delivers powerful antioxidants and phytonutrients to help fight free radicals and maintain your body's en general, general health.

The Premier Açai Blend™
MonaVie's delicious blend of body-beneficial fruits is designed to nourish your body with powerful antioxidants and...
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posted by milorox18
10
A True Boyfriend:


When she walks away from tu mad, follow her

When she stare's at your mouth, kiss her

When she pushes tu o hit's you, Grab her and dont let go

When she start's cussing at you, kiss her and tell her tu amor her

When she's quiet, Ask her what's wrong

When she ignore's you, Give her your attention

When she pull's away, Pull her back

When tu see her at her worst, Tell her she's beautiful

When tu see her start crying, Just hold her and dont say a word

When tu see her walking, Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared, Protect her

When she lay's her head on your shoulder,...
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posted by patrisha727
1
On an average work day, a typist's fingers travel 12.6 miles.

Every minuto in the U.S. six people turn 17.

Ten tons of el espacio dust falls on the Earth every day.

On average, a 4-year-old child asks 437 preguntas a day.

Blue and white are the most common school colors.

Swimming pools in Phoenix, Arizona, pick up 20 pounds of dust a year.

In a normal lifetime an American will eat 200 pounds of peanuts and 10,000 pounds of meat.

A new book is published every 13 minutos in America.

America's best selling ice cream flavor is vanilla.

Every año the sun loses 360 million tons.

Because of Animal Crackers,...
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posted by emisa123
8
1. Whenever tu eat ice cream with a friend, start canto "DO THE ICE CREAM AND CAKE! DO THE ICE CREAM AND CAKE!"

2. If your friends has a oro fish, put bubble soap in its bowl/aquarium. Stir it into the water.

3. If tu friends has a oro fish, put goldfish crackers into its bowl/aquarium. When your friends asks why, tell them the pescado were lonely.

4. When escritura and e-mail to your friends, WriT lIKe DIs.

5. Introduce your friend and then say "She/he's the crazy one" <- credit dado to CAITLYN_SU for that one

6. Sing The Song That Never Ends

7. When at their house, immediately open their fridge and eat whatever tu like.

8. mostrar them this lista XD

If tu have any más ways, please write them in comentarios so I can use them in future articles.

<3 Emisa123
posted by wild-bby
8
1) Women amor to talk on the phone. A woman can visit her girlfriend for two weeks, and upon returning home, she will call the same friend and they will talk for three hours.

2) Women will drive miles out of their way to avoid the possibility of getting lost using a short cut.

3) Women do NOT want an honest answer to the question, "How do I look?"

4) PMS stands for: Permissible Man-Slaughter (or at least men think it means that). PMS also stands for Preposterous Mood Swings and Punish My Spouse.

5) Women will make three left turns to avoid making one right turn.

6) "Oh, nothing," has an entirely...
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posted by wild-bby
12
1) tu lose arguments with inanimate objects.

2) tu have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.

3) Your job is interfering with your drinking.

4) Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.

5) The back of your head keeps getting hit por the toilet seat.

6) tu sincerely believe that alcohol is the elusive 5th comida group.

7) 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence? I think not!

8) Two hands and just one mouth - now THAT'S a drinking problem!

9) tu can focus better with one eye closed.

10) The car park seems to have moved while tu were in the pub.

11) You...
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Pray to the pins, leave sacrifices
Wear golf shoes.
Every time tu throw exclaim "TAKE THAT, tu JERKS!" Continue this behavior until forcefully thrown out.
When ever a strike "X" appears on the screen, start yelling about how this is a Black pantera, panther conspiracy.
Explain to the owner how your game is "All sorts of messed up" due to plate tectonics, then lose him in lingo. Demand compensation.
Make lewd and graphic references to your "ball". Works well on Senior Ladies night
Play bocci with extra lane balls
Try to juggle the balls, when tu drop them, start screaming about plate tectonics again....
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