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Article by karpach_14 posted hace más de un año
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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was
really pissed.

She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the
driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 segundos AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!"

The siguiente morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke
up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box
gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.

Confused, the wife put on her túnica, albornoz and ran out to the driveway, brought
the box back in the house.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Bob has been missing since Friday.
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Fan fiction by moolah posted hace más de un año
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Brotherly Love
By: moolah
Prologue

    Growing up with 4 brothers can be hectic. Even though Jesse, my twin brother was born 2 hours before me, he made sure I knew that I was the youngest. My oldest brother, Aaron was protective over me, as well as my 2nd oldest brother Martin was.
    I’m Emberlynn. Just the youngest child of Bernice and Amanda List. Our family lived in the good neighborhood. We always had food, and money. When I was in middle school my friends would always come over to spy on my twin brother, Jesse. They thought he was cute. We shared a room-always, because my brother always felt that we were close. We were born together, but still. It would’ve been nice to know that if I were in my own room, I wouldn’t have to worry about him waltzing in while I was changing. I also wouldn’t have minded having a sister. Or, a younger brother. That would’ve been nice. Now that I’m in 11th grade-things are changing. Big things. Things that will come between me and my brother. We had know idea.
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Opinion by Sheetal1256 posted hace más de un año
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Here are some funny New Year's resolutions for 2012...
I will think of a contraseña other than "password" o "hello".

I will not tell the same story at every get together.

I won't worry so much.

I will cut my hair.

I will grow my hair.

I will stop considering other people's feelings when they so obviously don't consider mine - if that unwashed fellow sits siguiente to me again, I'll tell him he stinks!

I will be más imaginative.

I will not bore my boss por with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some más excuses.

I will do less laundry and use más deodorant.

I will avoid taking a bath whenever possible and conserve más water.

Assure my lawyer that I will never again mostrar up drunk at a custody hearing.

I will give up chocolates totally. 100%. Completely. Honestly....

I will try to figure out why I *really* need nine e-mail addresses.
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Opinion by Sheetal1256 posted hace más de un año
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How to Tell if a Guy likes You
How to Know that a Guy Likes You

Here are the 500 ways to tell if a guy likes You....

01. He smiles at tu a lot.

02. He likes talking to you.

03. He compliments tu a lot.

04. He always agrees with you.

05. He asks if tu are single.

06. He asks tu out for lunch.

07. He asks tu out on a date.

08. He knows your zodiac sign.

09. He never burps around you.

10. He really cares about you.

11. He treats tu like a lady.

12. He walks tu to your door.

13. He wants to see tu often.

14. He always wants to hug you.

15. He tells tu he likes you.

16. His friends know your name.

17. He introduces tu to his mom.

18. He shows up on time on dates.
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Opinion by tdafan121 posted hace más de un año
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I've recently seen fights going on over anime (you know who tu are!) and I don't like it. Everyone's entitled to their own opinions, but fighting is not and will never be the answer to anything. If us Fanpoppers can suck it up and stop fighting enough to end fanwars of all shapes and sizes, maybe then it wouldn't be hard for us, the kids of today, to become the peacemakers of tomorrow and end real wars por talking it out. If the world would realize that fighting is never the answer to any question, comment, concern, o complaint, then maybe we could be peaceful. If peace can happen here on Fanpop, trust me, the siguiente thing I expect to see is a pig fly past my bedroom window and then be sucked into a book. Can't we bury the hatchet? Some of us, I'm sure, have seen countless fanwars all over and done nothing but watch and wait for it to blow over, maybe even be a part of the fighting. But maybe if we all, all 9,584 of us, tried stopping it, no matter what the cause, spot, o effect, maybe we could make fanpop a better place. I know that after watching several shows on several channels that address fanwars like this I want to stop them before they turn bad. Is it so difficult to get...
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Opinion by yukikiyruu posted hace más de un año
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at do men want in a relationship?

Well, I'm sure that is one pregunta which would have dado many a woman a sleepless night indeed. After all, 'men' and 'relationships' happen to be two parties which since ages, have been notorious for never having been able to get along well with each other. A whole lot of women, for years on end, have struggled to decipher the mind of a man once he's in (or on the verge of getting into) a relationship. At times, I really wonder just how many women are really able to understand what exactly it is that men want in a relationship. To be honest, (and yes, I'll be very honest throughout this article), I don't really blame them for their predicament. 'Coz although it is a globally accepted fact that Eves are the más complex and complicated of the Creator's creations; the moment tu throw in the word 'relationship', suddenly the entire scene changes, and it's the Adams who instantly turn into paranoid princes.

Now don't get me wrong. It's not that we men are phobic when it comes to commitment, o for that matter, marriage. It's just that when it comes to serious relationships, we do have our fair share of fears and feelings of...
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Opinion by yukikiyruu posted hace más de un año
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How To Know If a Girl Likes tu – Clichés

Here are some of the signs that have been popularized over the years as ‘ surefire ways to know whether a girl likes you’. Some of these might seem a bit silly, although people claim to these to work; I personally think these are not applicable to every girl that tu meet. Making inferences about a girl’s feelings merely por the way she looks at tu o por the ways she flutters her eyes might seem very romantic and mushy, just like they mostrar it in the movies, but again, if only things shown in the romantic chick flicks would come true, life would’ve been a piece of cake. Here are five silliest clichéd ‘how to know if a girl likes tu signs’:
She plays with her hair while talking to tu o while looking at you. (Really? Well it could be that she is using the paloma hair conditioner that makes tu want to touch your hair…haven’t seen the ad eh?)
She touches her neck. (Seriously? What if she is having a stiff neck that’s hurting real bad? ).
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Opinion by yukikiyruu posted hace más de un año
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Funny Stupid preguntas to Ask People
What happens when tu get 'half scared to death' twice?
Is it true cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
If all the world's a stage, where does the audience sit?
It it's tourist season why can't we shoot them?
Why are the alphabets in the order that they are? Is it because it's a song?
If tu write a book about failure, and it doesn't sell, is it called success?
If amor is blind, why is ropa interior so popular?
If work is so terrific, how come tu get paid for it?
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the others drown too?
Are the good things that come to people who wait, the leftovers of people who went before them?
Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?
Isn't disney World a people trap operated por a mouse?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality comes from morons?
Why aren't blueberries blue?
Why is Greenland called Greenland, when it's white and covered with ice?
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Opinion by yukikiyruu posted hace más de un año
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Sleeping Beauty: Perfect for the sleepyheads.
Dolly Wholly: This name is perfect for the well-dressed girl.
Honey Bunny: Ideal for your playful girlfriend.
Cutsie Wootsie: This cute name is excellent to say when tu are pinching her cheeks with both hands.
Pretty Eyes: If your girlfriend has crystal-clear, beautiful eyes, then tu may call her por this cute name.
Princess: It is a perfect name for your girlfriend, if she has that little girl spirit.
Pumpkin: This name can be used for casual moments.
Doll Face: This name is perfect for a girl with a cute face.
Beautiful: It is a simple but effective name.
Sugar Cake: Prefect for the sweet and happy girl.
Sugar Puff: This cute name is ideal for your girlfriend, if she is sweet and very sensitive.
Cup Cake: Perfect for a sweet and innocent girl.
Snookums: tu can call your girlfriend por this cute name before a kiss.
Peaches: This name is ideal for a girl who blushes a lot.
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List by ranmaakane4ever posted hace más de un año
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HAHAHA
HERE I AM AGIAN BUT THIS TIME WITH MY SIBLING...ya!!!so WE ARE HERE TO TALK ABOUT THE TRAGIC STORY OF STALKERS...SO READ THIS lista AND IF tu DO ANYTHING ON THIS lista SEE A DOCTER FAST..SO CALL 555-STLAKER HELP(THIS IS NOT REAL DO NOT CALL AND IF tu DO I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR tu GETING INVOLVED WITH SOME DILEMA/PROBLEM)PLEASE DO NOT CALLL!!!!!!!!!!!!HERE ME DO NOT CALLL!!!

lIST BEGINS NOW:
1.DO tu HAVE THE EURGE TO FALLOW PEOPLE AROUND(FRIENDS,GIRLFRIENDS/BOYFRIENDS o WORSE STRANGERS)
2.DO tu TEXT/CALL CERTIAN PEOPLE 23/7(AS tu CAN SEE NOT 24/7 BUT 23/7 THAT WAY THEY HAVE 1HR TO RREST)
3.DO tu LIKE TO KNOW WHERE PEOPLE ARE AT ALL TIMES.
4DO tu SPY ON ON PEOPLE(HID IN BUSHES,TREES)
5.DO tu OWN BONOCULARS(PLEASE SAY NO UNLESS A BIRD WACTHER)
6.DO tu HAVE PLANS (YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN por THAT.)
7.DO tu ARRANGE TO BUMP INTO PEOPLE AND ACT LIKE IT WAS FATE!(CREEPER)
8.DID tu EVER PUT A CHIP ON SOMEONE TO TRACK THEM DOWN AND KNOW WHER THEY ARE AT ALL TIMES.
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Opinion by yukikiyruu posted hace más de un año
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Relationships! We all need a good laugh now and again! ; )

Behind every clever man, is a scientist running tests.

Behind every great woman is a man checking her out.

I don't want to sound sexist here, but I do think men make better Santa's. Men have bigger bellies, men are used to sitting long periods of time and men have lots of experience making promises they have no intention of keeping.
- arrendajo, jay Leno.

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood.

Is there a cure for a broken heart? Only time can heal your broken heart, just as time can heal his broken arms and legs. - Miss Piggy

amor is rare.
So I shot it, and mounted it on my wall.

Finding amor can be like the mail
Sometimes tu get junk.
Sometimes tu get just what tu need

Women might be able to fake orgasms, but men can fake whole relationships.

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Opinion by samuraibond005 posted hace más de un año
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I am Christian, everything dicho in this articulo is my opinion and my view on this subject, I am not stating this as a fact, simply as a way to share my point of view on dicho subject.
God created the heavens and the earth and all who dwell in both, except for himself of course. (God dicho to Moses that he is without beginning and without end.) He created the heavens, heaven is perfect, free of sin, free of pain, a perfect world. Now it is pretty common knowledge that the bible states that all sexual relations must be between a man and a woman, making then homosexuality a sin. (Don't get me wrong, I am some form of bi, I am a guy but there are guys that I think are just plain hot.)
What I don't get however is that many Christians assume that god hates homosexuals, let me lista some problems with that assumption...
1. Whatever happened to God loves all his children, are homosexuals not his children?
2. God created heaven without sin, so ideally that would mean that there is no homosexuality in heaven, if God wanted to make a world without homosexuality, then he could have, and would have.
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Guide by hrsagar posted hace más de un año
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A boy had cancer & he had 1 mes to live . He amor a girl who was working in a CD shop. Bu t he didn't tell her about his . Everyday he went 2 the CD comprar & bought a CD 2 talk to her . But he found she never dicho anything to him. After a mes he died . When the girl went to his inicial & asked abt him , his mom told that he died & took her to his room . She saw all CDs r unopened . The girl cryed & cryed....;-(
Finally she also died .
* u know why ???
Bcoz she kept her own amor letters inside the CD packs. So it means , she also loved her !!
So if u amor some1 say 2 her/him directly . Don't wait 4 the destiny of role.............
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Article by sierradawn9 posted hace más de un año
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Ok, so I'm a redhead. I have freckles and light skin. So I'm considered ginger. Until a few weeks ago, I didn't even know what that term meant.
 I learned what it meant when I was on the bus and this guy took something from me. He dicho he wouldn't give it back until I admitted I was a ginger. So I dicho "I'm a ginger...?", and he yelled "You have no soooouuul!"
 That got me mad, sad, and confused.
 Seriously guys. Really? Just because some (and I do mean some) redheads have attitudes and act bitchy, that does NOT give tu the right to make a stereotype out of the rest of us redheads.
 I'm not talking to the people who respect redheads and consider them equal. To those people, thank tu for not being mean and offending us good redheads. tu are appreciated in many ways.
 Oh, and what I really hate is those cine that make the villains redheads, like Twilight, Hannah,and The Rescuers (that movie is for little kids, and they illustrate that redheads are evil por having the villain almost kill the little girl and use a shotgun every 5 minutes). I'm sure there are more, but I'm not a movie person.
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Article by simlover4 posted hace más de un año
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A couple weeks hace in religon, my teacher told us something really weird. There are some clinics in the united states that let tu diseño custom babies.
yuo can pick stuff like gender,hair colour,skin colour, eye colour and I think even personality traits.

Some people might actually do that but I think that might not be very seguro for the mother o the baby. There is a bunch of tests and stuff that they have to do and it may result in something going wrong.

Custom-made kids will be achieved through preimplantation genetic diagnosis, o PGD, the procedure used to weed out problem embryos and to allow parents to choose a gender.

In letting parents decide what traits their kids have, doctors will examine the genetic makeup of embryos created in the lab and implant the ones that have the best chance of giving mom and dad what they want.

Weird isn't it?
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Article by moolah posted hace más de un año
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hola guys! It’s moolah, and I decided to post pictures of everybody in cabina for the Summer(not my real friends, but fake ones.)
Since this has to be an articulo I’ll tell u about our field trip today!!
Ok, we went to Chambersburg and stuff, and took bunches of pictures. Then we took a tour of the town and took some AWESOME pictures of stuff. After that we went to the Heritage center where we watched a movie and stuff. I bought a big pencil and a bracelet, that is blue and says Heritage Center on it. After that, our guide, morgan took us to the Jailhouse, and we got to go in the stalls where they kept people, and stuff! It was awesome when we went down to the basement, me and my friend Anne were sooo scared, and this boy, Luke who likes her kept trying to give her, his sweatshirt!! Then we went down to the place where they hanged people and stuff. We put our heads in that place where they put them and cut their heads off, and I got some AWESOME pictures on my phone and iPod touch of me, Anne, and my boyfriend. It was an AWESOME field trip!!!:]
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List by brittanyloves posted hace más de un año
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10. When being pulled over por a cop and he o she says, "Sir(/)Ma'am, tu have been caught speeding, how much do tu think tu were going?" Don't say, "Well tu must've gone AT LEAST 90 to catch up with me."

9. When your teacher asks where your homework is when tu haven't handed it in don't say, "My dog ate my homework." That's the oldest excuse in the book. Plus, nobody ever buys it unless they are a complete moron o born yesterday.

8. When your older sister is having her period o PMS-ing don't say, "Hey sis, have tu been putting on a little weight?" It's a perra slap waiting to happen.

7. When your brother has a porno magazine and tu see it don't say, "I thought tu were gay!" Though it may be funny, if you're a boy, he'll kill you, if you're a girl he'll ruin your reputation in anyway possible.

6. When your parents ask if tu have cleaned your room don't say, "I was doing IMPORTANT things!"

5. If your parents are very uptight about the topic of sex don't ask, "Where do bebés come from?" Though their embarrassment is priceless to you, they may either give tu some bullcrap o worse, tell tu the horrible...
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Opinion by dodo4 posted hace más de un año
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“Why Study For Exams.... Are they not about what tu know, not about how much tu can cram into your head the night before?”

“I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting siguiente to me.”

“I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot más as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they're cramming for their final exam.
Exams Quotes


After the first exams, I switched to the Faculty of Philosophy and studied Zoology in Munich and Vienna.
Karl von Frisch

Every year, más than 300 million x-rays, CT scans, MRIs and other medical imaging exams are performed in the United States, and seven out of 10 people undergo some type of radiologic procedure.
Charles W. Pickering

Experts always know everything but the fine points. When I took my citizenship exams, no one there knew how the White House came to be called the White House.
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Guide by dodo4 posted hace más de un año
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This above all, to thine own self be true.
- William Shakespeare



The words of truth are always paradoxical.
- Lao Tzu

He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is enlightened.
- Lao Tzu

The wise man does not lay up his own treasures.
The más he gives to others, the más he has for his own.
- Lao Tzu

Nothing is softer o más flexible than water, yet nothing can resist it.
- Lao Tzu

Silence is a fuente of great strength.
- Lao Tzu

Life is without meaning.
tu bring the meaning to it.
The meaning of life is whatever tu ascribe it to be.
Being alive is the meaning.
- Joseph Campbell

The cave tu fear to enter holds the treasure tu seek.
- Joseph Campbell

Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it.
- Confucius

Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.
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Opinion by Thecharliejay posted hace más de un año
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1. If using a touch-tone, press misceláneo numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.
2. Make up a charge-card name. Ask if they accept it.
3. Use CB lingo where applicable.
4. Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.
5. Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."
6. Tell the order taker a rival pizza place is on the other line and you're going with the lowest bidder.
7. Give them your address, exclaim "Oh, just surprise me!" and hang up.
8. Answer their preguntas with questions.
9. In your breathiest voice, tell them to cut the crap about nutrition and ask if they have something outlandishly sinful.
10. Use these bonus words in the conversation: ROBUST FREE-SPIRITED COST-EFFICIENT UKRAINIAN PUCE.
11. Tell them to put the crust on parte superior, arriba this time.
12. Sing the order to the tune of your favorito! song from Metallica's "Master of Puppets" CD.
13. Do not name the toppings tu want. Rather, spell them out.
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Article by Musiclover456 posted hace más de un año
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I'm sorry to those who i can't help
I'm sorry to those who are abused
I'm sorry to those who are alone
I'm sorry to those who are different
I'm sorry I'm not normal

I'm sorry i can't live how i want to
I'm sorry I'm different
I'm sorry people suffer
I'm sorry to those who know me
I feel so sorry for existing in this world
because I cause nothing but pain to those I love
because those who know me end up suffering
that's why I'm always so sorry
I say I'm sorry to the world
because I exist
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Opinion by dodo4 posted hace más de un año
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When creating a lista of 100 ways to motivate yourself it struck that there were some commonalities inherent in a lot of the entries. Most of the items on the lista consist of a physical o emotional state that tu don’t currently have but can make into a goal of some type that tu can then strive after. The motivation in this is two fold if tu keep in mind that the journey o striving is just as important as the goal o endpoint. If tu can periodically look at how far tu have come from where tu started then the distance left to the goal won’t matter as much because tu will have a sense of accomplishment along the way which is motivating in itself. This articulo will lista the 100 ways to motivate yourself and give a guide at the end of the list.
01. Create a Vision

02. Tell a True Lie

03. Leave Your Comfort Zone

04. Find Your Key

05. Plan Your Work

06. mover Your Goal Posts

07. Dribble with Your Other Hand
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Guide by kairi13050 posted hace más de un año
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hi, i'm kairi. i felt bored and just decided to give up my acquired knowledge for those of tu who need a little help with being más popular on fanpop/ are bored and just feel like lectura something.

1. consider something someone might want to take part in. some of the most popular respuestas have to do with games o something of the sort. this is because they sound interesting to a fan, so they'll click it.

2. ask the fans about themself. people like talking about themselves and sharing interesting stories, it's human nature.

3. think about what you're asking. think about the subject's popularity. for instance: if tu ask something about a game no one's ever heard of, no one is going to answer it, but if tu ask something about justin beiber, odds are lots of people will answer, because he is popular and people like to make fun of him/ defend him when people make fun of him.

4. ask something random. the más random, the más it catches attention. this IS the misceláneo spot. : )
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Opinion by TruBerries posted hace más de un año
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It's hilarious how some people get on the defensive when they hear o see the word 'grammar' anywhere on the internet. Who am I kidding, the misceláneo Club! I know a lot of people read the article, but obviously it must of hit a nerve, but I could careless because it wasn't put up to put people down and I know MOST of y'all just saw the título and got upset. Oh, that's wrong, but it's okay to put up preguntas o statements like ' I hope I"m pretty enough' (and don't say that it doesn't bother tu because a lot of y'all complained about those), 'I'm in amor with someone I've met online. What should I do?'. Seriously? I,myself o anybody else is not supposed to be annoyed about that, but we're not allowed to say how we feel on más serious issues like people being called out their names. Example, yesterday's popular topic was asked why are we girls so slutty? Something like THAT, I take offense to because every girl in the world is not a slut. Just because some girls dress provocatively doesn't mean that she's asking to get raped. In these days, women of self-respect seemed to be getting victimized por rape. Y'all don't get mad about stuff like that, but tu get mad at grammar. I can...
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Opinion by yukikiyruu posted hace más de un año
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Listen to what she has to say.
Remember what she says.
Paying attention even when she isn’t around. Example? "I remember tu telling me tu amor that song por So-and-so. It was playing the other día and it made me think of you."
Let her know she comes into your mind even when she isn’t around.
Compliment her.
Make her smile.
Give her enough el espacio to maintain her desired Independence.
Be there when she needs you. Even if it seems silly to you. Problems affect different people differently, so try to understand.
Don’t let her get away with disrespecting you. This may come as a surprise, but in every relationship, there will times where boundaries are tested. She won’t fall for someone who let’s themselves be walked all over. Let her know that tu will always respect her, and tu expect the same in return.
Trust her. Jealousy is only attractive to those immature enough to find it flattering. In reality, jealous can be a very ugly thing when it goes to great extents. Trust her. If tu don’t and can’t trust her, then tu don’t belong in a relationship with this person.
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