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Article by moolah posted hace más de un año
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Important Note for: readers of “Cabin for the Summer”


Hi guys! It’s me, the writer and creator of Cabin for the summer moolah. I have some HORIBLE news guys! And I am sooooooo sorry to spring this on you guys.

Don’t worry, everything is fine between me and my boyfriend, “Laken” but unfortunately my friend, “Chelsea” broke up her boyfriend, “James”. This sprung upon me and I am really upset because now I can’t bring you the marvelous adventures of them. BUMMER!! :’[. Also “Ella” is thinking about breaking up with her boyfriend, “Zack”. I don’t know if she has decided yet, and am really scared. I don’t want to write a story with them all untogether. I think what is going to happen is they are going to break up and “James” does something dangerous. I am not sure. I will give you readers 4 options.


A) Cancel the story
B) Break James and Chelsea up
C) Start another story with them separate
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Opinion by princesslullaby posted hace más de un año
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Beast x Rose
Beast paced back and forth in the West Wing, the padding on his feet shooting up little plumes of dust as he walked. Cogsworth had tried to console him about the beautiful girl that wanted nothing to do with him, but Beast couldn't tell Cogsworth that wasn't what he was concerned about. Ten years as a Beast, and he had stopped loving women, and knew he could never amor this girl. o any person, for that matter. Every night he had spent curled up with his rose, mourning over his beastly nature. And the rose had been there, silently comforting him, glowing with love. And at some point, Beast knew he had fallen in amor with his rose. He stopped pacing and gazed at the flower, eyes glazing over. "Rosey...what am I going to do? The only way I can become human again is if I fall in amor with this girl." The Beast explained, throwing his paws up in the air. The rose dicho nothing, as usual. "But I can't fall in amor with her when I'm so in amor with you." He said, delicately stroking one petal. The rose dicho nothing. "How can I amor her, she's never been here to make me feel better. Only you." He said, drool hanging out of his mouth and eyes glowing...
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List by Alexyss_Cullen posted hace más de un año
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A link
B link
C link
D link
E link
F link
G link
H link
I link
J link
K link
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Article by fly210 posted hace más de un año
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Kate: then she she was all like OH NO tu did NOT! then she did the worst thing ever!

Liz: What's that? kiss your boy friend?

Kate: No not that bad!

Liz: Did she mess up your hair?!

Kate: Wores.

Liz: Break your leg?

Kate: no.

Liz: Tell ya mom about that night with daved?

Kate: I told tu not to remind me of that!

Liz: sorry. What?

Kate: SHE BROKE MY NAIL!

LIZ: NO!

Kate: Yes!

Liz: Ooooooo! When I get to school tomorrow she is gonna GET IT! All that other stuff was NOT as bad as this! mostly breaking your leg. How dumb is that!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hope ya guys liked it! I just came up with it just a segundo ago. well tell me what tu think!I am planing on making más short storys so keep an eye out. bye. I LIKE PIE! GOOD NIGHT NEW YORK!
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Opinion by iamagagamonster posted hace más de un año
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~ In my opinion! alright! tu can think what ever tu can think about the heros on here ~

5. Batman: The majority of people amor batman, I go for Superman. batman dosn't even have super powers he only has gadjets [spelling?] and gizmos. One día he's gona be in deep danger and then he won't be able to reach his "special" button. Without the help of his sidekick, which brings me to my siguiente hero

4. Robin: Robin is a superhero named after a migratory songbird that tu can find in your backyard and feed bird seed to. Can someone tell me why they would name Batman’s sidekick after a songbird? What do bats have to do with robins anyway? Is there some connection that I’m missing here? Bats and robins can both fly, something neither batman nor Robin can do por the way, but other than that the two have nothing in common. Robins aren’t even nocturnal. The funny thing is, Robin is one of the first superheroes ever created. (granted “super” is a stretch here). Its not like they were running out of cool bird names for superheroes at that point. I’m pretty sure Hawkman was still available. o even the Blue Falcon. So we’re left with the simple question: Why...
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Opinion by smileypop9 posted hace más de un año
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When I don't understand a word, I always go to link to see their silly definitions before I consult an actual dictionary.
I spent some time searching up words, and some of the definitions were hilarious! So here ya go, some of the definitions I found interesting/funny:

link
There's a lot of definitions. My fave one is:
'A place where young, innocent, defencless children are kept prisoner and forced to learn useless stuff like algebra that won't count for fuck when they're old enough to get employed....
multiply out the brackets...
2a(3m+2p+12k-12-90)
...would someone like to explain to me...WHAT THE HELL THIS IS???'

link
'[i]Your parents parents, usually old. tu may not want to visit them now, but when they open up, tu will hear well-spun stories of their "glory days". And if tu are lucky tu will hear stories of their many diffrent conquests, being either drugs o boyfriends/girlfriends. War stories are...
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Article by fly210 posted hace más de un año
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"MA!" I dicho "I want a sister!" My mom looked at my dad. My dad shruged and then as if relising somthing nodded yes very quick and very fast. "Alright." dicho my mom. "But tonight the baby fairy will be in our room and will make alot of noise so don't go near our room o it will fly away." "I won't." "Ok."

~~~~~~~~~~that night~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was in my bed. All night the sound of springs was going on in ma and da's room. I couldn't help it. I ran across the hall and peeked into their room. I didn't see a fairy. O.o
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Article by karpach_14 posted hace más de un año
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Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking inicial they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone o something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home.

The siguiente día the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came inicial last night without her panties." "That's nothing," dicho the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the fuego Station, Well never forget you!'
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Opinion by EmzLovesCheryl posted hace más de un año
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I was seven years old when I first got called a Witch.


People had always wondered about me. My parents didn't talk about my adoption, so neither did I. I knew about it, but I didn't think anything of it. I didn't really understand the meaning of the word. I had a family, why should I care if they weren't the first people to hold me when I was born? They loved me, they cared for me, that's all that mattered.
I had mum. She was blonde and plump, she had rosy cheeks and her hair was always near and tidy. She wore casual jeans and casual tops, and would pick me up from school in her citroen, just like every other mum.
I had a dad too. He was short, bald, and had a giant cerveza belly. He had a laugh louder than the sound of a tractor, smily eyes and was always fully of a lame jokes.
Sometimes the two of them would argue, and I'd sit there with my hands cupped over my ears, blocking out the noise. They'd always make up again though. Always.

I had a brother too; he came along when I was about four years old. My soft mum and chirpy dad asked me if I'd like a sibling, maybe a little brother?
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Opinion by sahian5 posted hace más de un año
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CAUTION:there will most likely be consequences!!

1. Follow them around the house while giggling loudly.
2. Moo whenever they say your name.
3. Pretend to have amnesia.
4. Say everything backwards.
5. Run into walls.
6. Say that wearing clothes is against your religion.
7. Go into their room at 4 in the morning and say "Good Morning Sunshine!"
8. Snort loudly when tu laugh.
9. Say all of the words in a film.
10. Pluck someone's hair out and yell "DNA!!!"
11. Go around the house saying: "Beep, beep!" Then hit your head with a book.
12. Have a lively conversation with a pen.
13. Have 20 imaginary friends that tu talk to all at the same time.
14. Try and climb the wall.
15. In public yell: "No, mom I will not kiss tu in public!"
16. Draw a mustache your face.
17. Switch the light switch on and off for a while. Then say "Oh...I get it!"
18. Eat your hair.
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Article by MarMar_XigLux posted hace más de un año
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One night, these kids were coming inicial from a party and there was a cemetery about one block away from home. One kid was telling the others about a local legend. If tu go and stand on the grave for ten segundos and stab a cuchillo into it, a hand will grab tu and pull tu into the grave with the corpse. One girl was Valiente enough to do it for $20.00. She got a knife, walked to a grave, stood on it, and stabbed the cuchillo into it. Suddenly, her leg felt heavy and she tried to pick it up, but something was grabbing HER! She was yelling and crying for help, but her friends thought she was kidding, so they just left. The siguiente day, they found out that she had died, of fright. She thought that somebody was grabbing her, but the cuchillo she was using had pierced her pants and held her there.

---

I've been lying in my room for hours now. It's 5:30 am and there's not much I can do. tu know what the worst part of my situation is? I'm in the same room with my parents. They keep looking at me, and I can't help but not look back and try not to cry o scream.
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Opinion by smileypop9 posted hace más de un año
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Link I found this on: link

Just when we thought facebook couldn’t impact our lives anymore, it found another way.

An Israeli couple has named their baby Like, after the Like button on Facebook. We’ve heard some unique names in our time, but this one is a bit silly. The couple claims they thought the name sounded “modern and innovative.”

facebook did not pay the couple, obviously, but this incident shows how large a role social media play in our lives. siguiente thing tu know, parents will start naming their children, Facebook. Wait, that actually happened earlier this year! A man in Egypt named his daughter facebook to express “his joy at the achievements made por the January 25 youth.”

Now we turn to our community. What do tu think of these names? What’s the most unusual name you’ve ever heard of?
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List by x-menobsessed26 posted hace más de un año
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Useful Hawaiian Phrases
On the Plane
My how your perfume fills the entire cabin!
'A'ala maoli keia wahi o kakou i kau wai 'ala kuikawa!


If I snore, I would like to apologize in advance
Ke nono au, e kala mua mai, i keia manawa ho'i.


I am filled with admiration for my in-flight meal
Kahaha ko'u na'au i ke 'ano o ka mea 'ai ma keia mokulele.


Only six dollars for a headset? Why thats only three dollars per ear!
Eono kala no ka ho'olohe lekio? 'O ia ho'i, 'ekolu wale no kala o kahi pepeiao!


Baby, Severe Turbulance is my middle name
E ku'u kumu e, mai hopohopo, ua kapa 'ia ko'u inoa waena, 'o ia 'o Severe Turbulance.
Checking in to the Hotel
This is a wonderful room for a dwarf
He lumi maika'i keia e ku pololei ana i ke kanaka peke.


How nice of tu to find a cama that will fit my leg
Mahalo nui loa ia 'oe, ua loa'a mai kahi moe kupono o ka nui no ko'u wawae 'akau wale no!
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List by x-menobsessed26 posted hace más de un año
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tu Might be a Child of the 80's If...
tu have deep, personal relationships via computers with people you've never met in real life before.


The phrase "going courting", to you, means fighting an unjust traffic ticket o playing tennis.


tu know, por heart, the words to any "Weird" Al Yankovic song.


The Brady Bunch movie brought back cool memories.


Songs por Debbie Gibson still haunt tu to this day.


Three words: "Atari" "IntelliVision" and "Coleco". Sound familiar?


tu remember the days when "safe sex" meant "my parents are gone for the weekend".


tu remember "Friday Night Videos" before the days of MTV.


tu ever owned a pair of "Pop-Wheels" - that handy little combination of shoe and roller patinar, skate that lasted about a año on the open market.


A predominant color in your childhood fotos is "plaid".

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Article by x-menobsessed26 posted hace más de un año
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Bill Gates Goes to Heaven
Bill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself in purgatory, being sized up por St. Peter.

"Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call; I'm not sure whether to send tu to Heaven o Hell. After all, tu enormously helped society por putting a computer in almost every inicial in America, yet tu also created that ghastly Windows '95. I'm going to do something I've never done before in your case; I'm going to let tu decide where tu want to go."

Bill replied, "well, what's the difference between the two?"

St. Peter said, "I'm willing to let tu visit both places briefly, if it will help your decision."

"Fine, but where should I go first?"

"I'll leave that up to you."

"Okay then," dicho Bill, "Let's try Hell first."

So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy playa with clear waters and lots of bikini-clad women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining; the temperature perfect. He was very pleased.
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Article by x-menobsessed26 posted hace más de un año
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Application For Permission To fecha My Daughter
Note: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied por a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical reportar from your physician.


Name:
fecha of Birth:
Height:
Weight:
IQ:
GPA:
Social Security Number:
Driver's License Number:
Boy Scout Rank:
Telephone:
inicial Address:
City:
State:
Zip:



Do tu have one male and one female parent? ____
If "No", explain:



Number of years your parents have been married: ____
Any brothers o sisters? ____
Are they normal? ____


Do tu own o have access to a van? ____
A truck with oversize tires? ____
A waterbed? ____


Do tu have an earring, nose ring, o belly button ring? ____


Do tu have a tattoo? ____
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Article by karpach_14 posted hace más de un año
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I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.

Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.

A man was complaining to a friend: 'I had it all - money, a beautiful house,a big car, the amor of a beautiful woman; then, Pow! it was all gone!' 'What happened?' asked the friend. 'My wife found out..'


Wife: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. Husband: Okay, but if tu get inicial before I do, leave the hallway light on.

How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened por the time she brings it to the couch.

A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, 'Martha, pack up your things! I just won the California lottery!' Martha replies, 'Shall I pack for warm weather o cold?' The man responds, 'I don't care. Just so long as you're out of the house por noon!'

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Article by karpach_14 posted hace más de un año
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Husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up.

But then the wife stops and says, "I don' t feel like it. I just want tu to hold me."

The husband says " WHAT???" The wife explains that he must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a woman.

The husband realizes that nothing is going to happen tonight and he might as well deal with it.

So the siguiente día the husband takes her shopping at a big dept. store. He walks around and had her try on three very expensive outfits. And then tells his wife, We 'll take all three of them. Then goes over and gets matching shoes worth $200 each.

And then goes to the jewelry Dept. and gets a set of diamond earrings. The wife is so excited (she thinks her husband has flipped out, but she does not care). She goes for the tenis bracelet.

The husband says "but tu don 't even play tennis, but OK if tu like it then lets get it.'

The wife is jumping up and down. So excited she cannot even believe what is going on. She says " I am ready to go, lets go to the cash register. "
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Article by karpach_14 posted hace más de un año
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He said... I don't know why tu wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.

She said...You wear briefs, don't you?

He said... Do tu amor me just because my father left me a fortune?

She said...Not at all honey, I would amor tu no matter who left tu the money.

He said... Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make amor to tu in the worst way.

She said...Well, tu have succeeded.

He said... tu have a flat chest and need to shave your legs, have tu ever been mistaken for a man?

She said...No, have you?

He said... Why do tu women always try to impress us with your looks, not with your brains?

She said...Because there is a bigger chance that a man is a moron than he is blind.

He said... Let's go out and have some fun tonight.

She said...Okay, but if tu get inicial before I do, leave the hallway light on.
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Article by karpach_14 posted hace más de un año
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Jack and Betty are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary.

"Betty, I was wondering -- have tu ever cheated on me?"

"Oh Jack, why would tu ask such a pregunta now? tu don't want to ask that question..."

"Yes, Betty, I really want to know. Please."

"Well, all right. Yes, 3 times."

"Three? When were they?"

"Well, Jack, remember when tu were 35 years old and tu really wanted to start the business on your own and no bank would give tu a loan? Remember how one día the bank president himself came over to the house and signed the loan papers, no preguntas asked?"

"Oh, Betty, tu did that for me! I respect tu even más than ever, that tu would do such a thing for me! So, when was number 2?"

"Well, Jack, remember when tu had that last corazón attack and tu were needing that very tricky operation, and no surgeon would touch you? Remember how Dr. DeBakey came all the way up here, to do the surgery himself, and then tu were in good shape again?"
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Article by karpach_14 posted hace más de un año
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A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed.

She puts on her túnica, albornoz and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the cocina mesa, tabla with a cup of coffee in front him. He appears deep in thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of coffee.

"What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room. "Why are tu down here at this time of night?"

The husband looks up, "Do tu remember 20 years hace when we were dating, and
tu were only 17?" he asks solemnly.

The wife is touched thinking her husband is so caring and sensitive. "Yes, I do," she replies.

The husband pauses. The words are not coming easily. "Do tu remember when
tu father caught us in the back asiento of my car?"

"Yes, I remember," says the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.

The husband continues..."Do tu remember when he shoved a shotgun in my face and said, "Either tu marry my daughter, o I will send tu to jail for 20 years".
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List by karpach_14 posted hace más de un año
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A group of girlfriends is on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: "For Women Only." Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in.

The bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. "We have 5 floors. Go up floor por floor, and once tu find what tu are looking for, tu can stay there. It's easy to decide since each floor has a sign telling tu what's inside."

So they start going up and on the first floor the sign reads: "All the men on this floor are short and plain." The friends laugh and without hesitation mover on to the siguiente floor.

The sign on the segundo floor reads: "All the men here are short and handsome." Still, this isn't good enough, so the friends continue on up.

They reach the third floor and the sign reads: "All the men here are tall and plain."

They still want to do better, and so, knowing there are still two floors left, they continued on up.
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List by karpach_14 posted hace más de un año
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A
is for Arteries.
tu know, the things that your ex-girlfriend ripped out because she really didn't care for tu tu twit she was only after your money and could have dado a shit about you.

B
is for Bitter. Who, me?? No way. I really hope things between them do work out. I hope they get married and have 2 children that are little devils and her hips get huge and his eyebrows finally grow completely together and they get fat and old together and then DIE!!

C
is for Call ya later.She won't. She never has before.

D
is for Dumped. Does D need to be explained?

E
is for Eating like a pig. Remember when tu took her out and she dicho "I'm not hungry" so tu figured tu could take her to a nice place because tu were able to afford a nice meal at this fine restaurant. Then she ate más than your Uncle Roy (you remember Uncle Roy the one with the mustard stains on everything). So tu flip the bill and are broke for the siguiente two weeks and she wonders why tu were unable to call her that week and go see movies.
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Article by karpach_14 posted hace más de un año
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There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps siguiente to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy tu another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

"No, it's not that. This día is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police dicho that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."

"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in cama with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, tu mostrar up and drink my poison."
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Article by karpach_14 posted hace más de un año
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A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.

On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."

"What?" dicho the puzzled groom.

"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he dicho he'd look into it and get back to me.

Husband #3 was from field services: he dicho everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and diseño a new state-of-the-art method.

Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job o not.
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