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List by cuteasprincie posted hace más de un año
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Survey reveals parte superior, arriba 50 funniest jokes ever told

[HK]

A joke about a male bus passenger insulting a woman's ugly baby has been voted the funniest gag ever told. Researchers examined más than 1,000 jokes before whittling them down to a final 50 and getting 36,000 people to vote for their favourites. Source: Onepoll.com

Comedy genius Tommy Cooper had por far the most jokes in the list, which also includes gags por Peter Kay and Lee Evans.

Jokes ranged from the legendary one-liner about a zoo with just one dog being a 'shitzu' - to ones about wives, husbands, blondes and foreigners.

The study was carried out after Tim Vine's joke "I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell tu what, never again." was voted the best of this year's Edinburgh Fringe Festival.

A spokesman for OnePoll, which carried out the research, said: "The majority of these jokes are clean and genuinely funny - but a lot are pretty subjective and what one person finds hilarious, someone else may not.
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List by cuteasprincie posted hace más de un año
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My icon (February 2014) {Please don't use it.Its my personal icon.Thank You.}
There are many sites which I found out randomly.Randomly here means like,searching for pics,videos,blogs,fan fictions,stories etc.And google helps a lot!So I decided to share the names of some websites (Five of them) which I found randomly while surfing :)

1.Fanpop (Yup!Fanpop itself)


It was I think 2009's end o 2010 when I found this website!That day,I was searching for some videos of Glee,some special episodes,which were not uploaded at YouTube (Or I was not able to find them as I was too lazy to flip to the 2nd page!)And then I found a link of video,uploaded on Fanpop.I clicked t,watched some episodes,and then I clicked the encuesta button of the club por mistake and discovered some fabulous questions..I wanted to answer those and then,a message came 'Sign Up today to play encuestas and lots more'.I sighed.Signing up in a website without even knowing it?!Impossible.So,I decided to explore Fanpop.I saw some other clubes too,especially Disney-related,for I'm a Die-hard and fanatic of Disney!And then I read some articles,some answers,some fans,and then my expression was like "O0O Awesome website!"And then I joined it and today I'm...
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Opinion by KataraLover posted hace más de un año
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I've actually been planning to do this for a while. I thought about doing this on youtube but I kept on getting lazy about it, especially since it takes a while to get videos uploaded on youtube. For some reason it's just a lot easier for me to make an articulo here on fanpop and talk about it. Anyway, this lista is based not only on the persons talent but on their personality as well. All of them have incredible personalities and some of them don't get as much amor as they should. So keep in mind this is just my opinion, please comment, and enjoy. Also keep an eye out for an upcoming articulo about my parte superior, arriba 15 most hated celebrities.

15.Lana Parrilla

Out of the entire cast of Once Upon A Time I have to say that she is absolutely my favorite, although I amor pretty much the entire cast. Once Upon A Time is my favorito! mostrar of ALL TIME! Anyway, first of all I want to say she's the most talented actor/actress of ALL TIME! Forget Hugh Jackmen, Johnny Depp, Emma Watson, and Anne Hathaway (who are all incredible), Lana is más talented than all of them. She knows how to be evil and really enjoys it but when she has to be good and...
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Opinion by dqwert posted hace más de un año
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In the weekend’s least shocking development, Miley Cyrus and Katy Perry locked lips. Crazy, right?! (And por crazy, I mean not crazy at all.)
Cyrus was canto the Bangerz ballad “Adore You” at an L.A. concierto when she climbed off the stage and summoned Perry, who was in the front row, to come lean in for a quick peck. Cyrus then backed up and squealed like she was surprised por her own mischief, which, okay, was pretty adorable. And the whole thing was caught on video, because of course it was. But really, did everyone forget that Perry’s first hit was called “I Kissed a Girl“?

GET más EW: Subscribe to the magazine for only 33¢ an issue!
Perry publicado an after-shot of the kiss on her Twitter with the caption, “I adore tu @MileyCyrus.” No regrets, just love.


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Opinion by blondcat30 posted hace más de un año
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its so sweet n awww every1 says can we all b real? ducha, ducha de 2gether? hell yea playtime wash eachother but married? kids? hide ur ding dong o hoohaa...but I can get any man in the world and stay N pay everything buy everything pay bills and get nothing no sex no I amor yous o calls u those cute names only when he wants sumthin then ignores u playing on internet then find out he tells misceláneo girl shes sexier than a goddess who deserves a king o fb bunch a tricks then hug me tell me sorry we had great nite til he sleeps and wakes up different I cry all nite says shut up calls names I cud never say on here wen I did nuthin wrong but look thru my work papers on "his side of bed" then wake up throws breaks things, leaves me in cama alone crying as I say help me o lay in here and I fall asleep and see hes still not back in cama then cry and check correo electrónico fall asleep wake up again to "here honey drink ur coffe o leche o I made u sumthn 2 eat o I cant wait to mover outta here together up north to start business then get along great 2 nights til 1 lil thing like "weres my cc" and say idk when I know I gave 2 him n say 4 times its siguiente 2u til I get it from were I told him n goes in back room...
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Opinion by hatelarxene posted hace más de un año
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Since Shake it Up has ended (thank goodness), I've decided to write a review on it. This mostrar sucks. Big time.

link
Yeah... People of that moronic mostrar expect me to call THAT music? That whole song o whatever the hell that was was nothing but auto-tune & editing!

They are awful actors, shitty singers (they don't even sing), and the characters are complete Mary-Sues! As for their dancing... please! All they do in that mostrar is mover around & look like a bunch of monkeys. I've watched plenty of solid dancing movies, & let me tell tu that these dancers are horrible, and no way in hell they would get a job as dance teachers with that kind of dancing, & they couldn't even dance to save their own lives (despite the fact that Zendaya is a great dancer on Dancing With the Stars... ONLY on Dancing With the Stars).
If tu want to see solid coordination, & truly awesome dancing, then watch the Step Up movies, Footloose (remake), Hairspray, o Smash. Now those cine (Smash being a TV show) right there know what dancing is about, whereas Shake It...
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Article by lolrandom393 posted hace más de un año
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Tuvalu- Tuvalu is a Mean Woman, she can be pretty boring, she likes to eat a lot of Candy, she has long curly hair just like Samoa, and she has a little skirt, and some tights, and some long boots that is all the way to her knees, and a long sleeve shirt, she also has a little diary, she never lets anyone in her house, she loves to be in conversations, plus, she might be a little nice

Samoa- Samoa is a foolish woman, she never speaks to anyone but Marshall Islands, everyone calls her stupid, otherwise that Canada and her are cousins, she be foolish to him,

*little mini story*
Samoa- where its Marshall Islands?
Tuvalu- she's over their!
Samoa- fine
Marshall Islands- hola Samoa!
Samoa- hola Marshall!
Marshall Islands- so what are tu doing?
Samoa- nothing, im just with Tuvalu
Marshall Islands- tu want to go see Fiji after the party?
Samoa- *cross fingers* yes
Marshall Islands- why are tu crossing your fingers
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Opinion by t_direction posted hace más de un año
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Why is an alarm clock going "off" when it actually turns on?

If tu mated a toro dog and a shitsu, would it be called a bullshit?

If an ambulancia is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them?

Why is uva Nuts cereal called that, when it contains neither grapes, nor nuts?

If Jimmy cracks maíz and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

Why is it called a "drive through" if tu have to stop?

Why does mineral water that has "trickled through mountains for centuries" go out of fecha siguiente year?

Why are Softballs hard?

Do the minutos on the movie boxes include the previews, credits, and special features, o just the movie itself?

If the professor on Giligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why is an electrical outlet called an outlet when tu plug things into it? Shouldn't it be called an inlet.
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Opinion by t_direction posted hace más de un año
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BOY : I can't leave tu ...
GIRL : Do tu amor me so much??
BOY : It's not that. You're standing on my foot.



BOY : May I hold your hand??
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.


GIRL : Did tu miss me while I was away??
BOY : Were tu away??


GIRL : Who was that girl I saw tu besar last night?
BOY : What time was it??


GIRL : Say tu amor me! Say tu amor me!
BOY : tu amor me ...


GIRL : If we become engaged will tu give me a ring??
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??


GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest ...
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple.


GIRL : Do tu remember when tu proposed to me? I was so
overwhelmed, I couldn't speak for an hora ...
BOY : Yes Darli! ng, that was the happiest hora of my life ...


GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever ...
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Opinion by t_direction posted hace más de un año
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1. Having to go around the room and say a fun fact about yourself. (And the moments spent waiting for your turn.

2. Someone tells tu something that tu already know because tu facebook stalked them, and tu have to pretend it’s the first you’ve heard of it.

3. Having to poop in a crowded restroom.

4. AND people tu know saw tu go into the stall and will know it’s you.

5. Saying “hi” to someone as they pass but it comes out a whisper and they don’t hear you.


6. When you’re the last person to get passed the sign-up sheet in class and tu have no idea what to do with it after tu sign it.

7. Starting to say something in a conversation and then getting interrupted — twice.

8. Going to a party por yourself and having to hover near some other people talking and then conversation-bomb them because tu have no one to talk to

9. Being seated at the quiet end of the mesa, tabla at a cena party and struggling to think of preguntas to ask the two people siguiente to you, while the loud end looks like they’re having A BALL.
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Article by misscrazel posted hace más de un año
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User: I'm 223366. In the sentence before this, how old did I say I was?

Cleverbot: The Game is Life?

User: You're hopless.

Cleverbot: That's what my mommy told me.

User: What's her name?

Cleverbot: Lucy.

User: May the force be with you!

Cleverbot: And with you.

User: I'm Legolas! Who are you?

Cleverbot: Your wife.

User: Are tu a girl?

Cleverbot: Yes I am.

User: Are tu female.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Are tu male?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Are tu a boy?

Cleverbot: I doubt it.


Cleverbot: Do tu like harry potter?

User: Never read it.

Cleverbot: Never read what?

User: Harry Potter.

Cleverbot: Who's that?

User: tu just asked me about it....

Cleverbot: No I did not.

User: Fine.
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List by hello_sun posted hace más de un año
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When I was little...

1. I got "plumber" and "plunger" mixed up alot.
2. I thought it was illegal for someone to see someone else naked.
3. I thought people still got wool from "shearing oveja when their 'hair' was too long" like they mostrar tu in fairs and shit.
4. I thought airplanes flew on electric energy.
5. I thought a "tower" was a kind of towel.
6. I thought a person's corazón was corazón shaped.
7. I thought paint came from colourful fruit.
8. Although I didn't think bebés came from the stork, I thought women got pregant randomly, but after they got married.
9. I opened containers twisting the gorra, cap to the right, and screwed it back on to the left.
10. I thought "north" was "up" and "south" was "down".
11, I couldn't tell the difference between left and right.
12. I thought when a woman was pregnant, the baby was inside her stomach, as in the part that holds intestines.
13. When I first heard of "sex", I thought it was just people making out in their underwear.
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Article by Bluekait posted hace más de un año
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Post the first line of a song tu are currently listening too in the comments. I 'll make a story out of it when I feel it is enough. Then we see how it turns out. If this keeps going after I publicado the story, the más I make.

I learnt this from a friend of mine who needed some inspiration. Hope this will inspire any struggling writers.

If tu want too, take the first line from 3 - 5 songs to make the story longer!

Guys, please don't bash o say anything rude to people's música interests. I don't care if it's 1D, Justin Bieber, o Miley Cyrus BUT be respectful. If so, I am not adding your song lyric to the story.

Here's mine: I'm all dressed up with nowhere to go
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List by hello_sun posted hace más de un año
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-apple
-raped
-tree
-sour
-lose
-ask
-opinion
-weather
-racket
-enough
-ant
-zebra
-ate
-the
-monkey
-batman
-puffball
-name
-laughter
-muse
-water
-soap
-opera
-why
-weird
-gate
-still
-lost
-ran
-away
-creature
-devour
-paper
-domes
-fly
-until
-question
-unable
-superficial
-needed
-desire
-sorry
-apologize
-okay
-never
-happened
-again
-tomorrow
-dread
-caution
-able
-the
-end

I have absolutely no idea what that was. Did anyone read until the end? (Literally "the end") Yeah, I would've skipped a few words too. That isn't what normally goes on in my mind, since I don't think in singular words, and I was looking around the room to get the words to pop into my head. Did tu get bored before "-the -end" and are not even lectura this? Hello? Anyone there? Weird...
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Opinion by mikla23 posted hace más de un año
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last night, Myanmar and Yemen sneeked into Laos Room, and then got on his laptop, Yemen tolled all about it, "it was all Myanmar's Fault" says Yemen, "you was the one that wanted to go in their" says Myanmar when she stands on the table, Jordan and Country Georgia went to the mall, "what should we get?" says Georgia (Country) "nothing but just juice," says Jordan, back at the tower, Yemen got on this link: link "La la lo" says Oman running down the hall, "COME BACK HERE DUDE!!!" shouts Malta when she runs down the hall to follow him, "NEVER!" shouts Oman as He runs down the hall, at 10:00 P.M. Yemen got on His laptop and got on this link: link "okay, let me just log in" says Yemen to himself, then it had a little problem, when he post a comment, a comentario showed up quick, the comentario did not like him, so he shut down the laptop, and he quick hugged Brazil (His girlfriend), that siguiente morning, when the Country Georgia and Jordan, "WHERE HAVE tu TWO BEEN" shouts Brazil, "uh..... Meh..." says Georgia when she Steps out the door, "okay, see tu later...
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Fan fiction by lunafan0299 posted hace más de un año
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Ok so we all hear amor stories, but this one is special. Ok so lets start the story. Ok the was a girl named Marie and she was in 10th grade so one día she was walking in the halls with her friends and then BUMP! She ran into Noah(her crush) she blushes then says "I'M SOOOOO SORRY NOAH!!!"Then Noah says "It's ok" then my friend(Sarah) dicho in Marie's ear "Someone likes Noah." Then Marie dicho "SHUT IT!!!!!" Then Noah dicho "Well bye Marie see ya in science." Then Marie dicho "Ya bye" He grins and waves. Marie walks to science class then sat por Noah. Then Noah said"Hey Marie" then she says "Hi". Then the teacher says "Time to partner up for your project ."Noah w-will tu be my partner?" Then Noah says "Ya amor to" then they work on making a robot. Then Noah gulps and says "Marie" "Yea?" "I was wondering will tu be my girlfriend?" Sure!!" Then in Noah's head he says "YESSSS!!" Then after school Noah and Marie go to the cine and then they go home. "Thanks Noah the movie was great" then noah says "Your welcome" then he goes in for a kiss and kisses Marie on the lips, then she waves and says "Love you" then he says "Love tu too." Then Marie closes the door and her mom runs up to her...
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Opinion by Bluekait posted hace más de un año
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Pick the door that looks the most appealing to you. This might reveal a few things about your personality. Let us know what door tu picked and if the answer was accurate for you. Feel free to SHARE!

1 - tu are a fun individual that likes to keep things light and airy. tu are all about nurturing others and appreciating the simple luxuries in life; such as your fine dishware, favorito! candle o eating artisan pan de molde, pan from the local bakery. tu most likely have a amor for traveling and other cultures. tu truly want the best for everyone and amor creating a welcoming atmosphere. It is important to remember that if tu ever feel that tu need help o support, it is OK to just ask someone.

2 - tu are clean and simple and don’t like any frills. tu might strive to have a clean and perfect existence; but is it totally worth it? Don’t tu feel that there is something missing? tu are all about your personal achievements and tu take pride in your work o career. Although tu might be on track with your career path o have a few diplomas/ certificates on your wall, tu need to spend más time on developing yourself as a person. Remember... the real you. Life...
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Article by KissKissHannah posted hace más de un año
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So I finished my essay. It's not the best in the world, but I tried my best!

Please give me your honest opinion.
Henry Hudson

Hudson was an English explorer and he was born around 1565. He disappeared in 1611. He was unknown about until 1607 when he went on 2 trips. One of the trips he made was to find a shortcut from europa to Asia. He also went to Greenland to buscar for another passage, and then he went to explore the new world.

He made the Arctics and North America popular, but then while he was exploring the new world, he suddenly disappeared! Nobody knows what happened to him, though.

After he disappeared, everyone was worried. They became sick, and some people thought he died. Nobody knew what happened. So that is what Henry Hudson is.


Cited Sources

1. That pamphlet Mr. Putt gave me

2. libros I read

3. Research online

That's my essay! I bet I'll get lots of negative comments
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Opinion by neacontes posted hace más de un año
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We Found Dove

Yellow soap in the washroom
and we're bathing side por side
As your bubble crosses mine
What it takes to come alive

It's the way i'm soaping
I just can't deny
But i've gotta let paloma go

we found paloma in a soapless place
we found paloma in a soapless place
we found paloma in a soapless place
we found paloma in a soapless place

Shine a bubble through an open door
paloma and shampoo i will divide
turn away cause i soap tu more
Feel the bubble in my mind

Yellow soap in the washroom
and we're bathing side por side
As your bubble crosses mine mine mine

we found paloma in a soapless place
we found paloma in a soapless place
we found paloma in a soapless place
we found paloma in a soapless place

we found paloma in a soapless place
we found paloma in a soapless place
we found paloma in a soapless place
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Article by dreamcatcher321 posted hace más de un año
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there's a girl. about 15. she hides her scars, with her mother's makeup. She wakes up. and she realizes, that today will never get better.

tu are más than this. tu are bliss. tu are más than this. there's happiness at the end of a rainbow.
open your eyes. keep holding on. don't give up, beautiful girl. your still needed on this world.

there's this girl. she hides her food. behind her bed.
when she looks, in the mirror, she sees nothing but ugliness. her mom asks her, if she's okay. she puts on a fake smile and tries to hide the pain.


tu are más than this. tu are bliss. tu are más than this. there's happiness at the end of a rainbow.
open your eyes. keep holding on. don't give up, beautiful girl. your still needed on this world.


OOOOOH this world is cruel. believe me, i know. but will tu still hold on? hold on? and try? for me? don't tu see? tu are an ángel to me.
tu are perfect in every way. doesn't matter if your gay, o wondering when your life begins. time may stop in your world but don't tu forget this;
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Guide by -SilverFey- posted hace más de un año
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A Faery in the Woods
I've seen a lot of artículos about Faeries online, but it seemed that quite a lot of them were más about Winx/Disney-type hadas then the Faeries I think of.
So here's just some of the 'darker' stuff on Faeries...:)
A good thing to keep in mind is that Faeries have different morals than we do. That does not mean they are evil; they just view right and wrong differently than we do.
For that reason, it is good to be cautious around Faeries, and to never anger them. Don't do anything that will let tu see them without their permission, for example, putting Faery Ointment on your eyelids o touching your eyelids with a four-leaf clover. If tu do that, any Faery tu see will ask tu "Which eye do tu see me out of?" When tu respond with either left, right, o both, they with promptly jab out whichever o both eyes, depending on which tu see them with.
Another way to not anger the Faeries is to never thank them. The Faeries see this to mean that tu do not mean to follow up on your debt. Most Faeries will excuse tu if tu thank them, as it comes automatically to humans, but some will not, and tu never know what you'll get with Faery vengeance. It could be...
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Article by misscrazel posted hace más de un año
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I stood in the small shelter outside of the preschool. This isn’t right. I shouldn’t be here. There are children playing all around me, but I’m alone.
I arrived at my house. It’s large and made of stone. I could hear children crying as they are scolded. I walked up the stone steps and opened the large doors. I go up to my room. My brother is there, holding two crying babies. He’s trying to calm them. My sister is there too, sitting on the floor. I sensed death in her. Not her body, but her soul. As if a piece of her was gone, taken away. I ran from the room, and down the halls. It smelled of blood, death. Then I smelled something else. Fire. I saw it, a brilliant light, twisting up the walls, creeping across the floor towards me. I ran, just as I did when my house burned. As I did when my parents died. Cries of agony filled the air. I fell to the ground; let the fuego burn my skin, my flesh, my bones. I can feel the fuego burning through me. I’m not aware of anything. Not the screams. Not the orphanage. Not even the fuego eating away at my flesh. I wasn’t aware of the hands that grasped me, pulled me from the flames.
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Article by misscrazel posted hace más de un año
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Gamelion 1st, año 0, 1st sun
Four mighty gods created the world. Minoth, god of fire, took a estrella from the sky. Grythnà, god of water, doused the flames. Kitithà, goddess of air, carved the estrella with powerful gusts of wind. At last Lamari, god of life, added the plants. Trees and grass. flores and vines. Then they added nine races; elves, dwarves, humans, undead, nymphs, nif, ninx, keelintà and kitsune. There were six of each race and eight types of elves; healing, nature, magic, water, night, fire, sun, and air. They believed they had created the perfect world. However, they made one mistake. One race went wrong. They filled them with hatred and greed. And with arrogance and the longing for power. These horrid creatures were the humans.
The humans drove apart the races of elves. Black and white magic elves were created. Water and fire, whom once had and alliance, were turned against each other. As were night and sun elves. The nature elves drifted from the others, until they were a mere legend. The nymphs too were driven away, as were the nif. Some elves joined different groups, forest people and ice people. The black magic elves created the race of wizards. A...
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Fan fiction by Hellowittykitty posted hace más de un año
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Completely misceláneo poetry! But that's what this site is for, right

Bold like new
Bold like old
Bold like me and my bro
Bold like the Sun
Way faster when I run

Bolder than her
Don't know who she is
She has little tiny eyes
That decorate her sin

Bolder than my mother will ever be
Bolder than my future son, who will never see me
Bolder and stronger, than Katy Perry
Bolder than that little doggy
Who has mad it through pet-adoptery

Bolder than that Valiente hero
Bolder than that black heart
Boldest of all
Even though I've never thrown a dart

Bolder than thus
Bolder than this
Bolder than what I'm escritura now
Dis, dat, and dis
Being bold doesn't change how tu are

o how tu look
o how tu talk
o how tu see
And how tu walk
Being bold, to me

Means that tu are free to walk
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List by BlondLionEzel posted hace más de un año
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January
---------------------------

Wolfe and the Grey Guards starts (1/20/14)

Fireman X starts (1/25/14)

----------------------------

February
----------------------------

Wolfe and the Grey Guards ends (2/5/14)

Wolfe and Finding the One starts (2/13/14)

Wolfe and Finding the One ends (2/14/14)

Fireman X ends (2/15/14)

Mirrorman X starts (2/17/14)

---------------------------------

March
---------------------------

Mirroman X ends (3/2/14)

-----------------------------

April
----------------

None

---------------


May
--------------------

Jumborg Ace X starts (5/11/14)

--------------------------

June
---------------------------

Jumborg Ace X ends (6/12/14)

----------------------------
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