misceláneo Club
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posted by Kyssmig
One snowy night, Sherlock Holmes was in his house sitting por a fire. All of a sudden a snowball came crashing through his window, breaking it.
Holmes got up and looked out the window just in time to see three neighborhood kids who were brothers run around a corner. Their names were John Crimson, Mark Crimson and Paul Crimson.
The siguiente día Holmes got a note on his door that read '? Crimson. He broke your window.'

Which of the three Crimson brothers should Sherlock Holmes pregunta about the incident?
posted by chillyneon
So alot of people I know have gotten superglue on them (including me) so I'm going to make this articulo for your help.

Super Glue on clothes = Throw away the clothes. The super glue burns it. Don't try to wash.

Super Glue on skin = Put skin in alcohol for about 1 min. Then, gently peel off glue.

Super Glue in eye = Wash out eye with warm water, then wait a little bit. If still irritated, go to the doctors.

Super Glue in ear = I don't know about this one................just go to the doctor.

So the thing is, when handling Super Glue, wear gloves o something to cover up your skin. Also, wear goggles to keep tu eyes safe.
posted by MsMindlessAztec
How to have fun in math class...

Student: *Enters math class, sits at desk*
Math Teacher: Alright students, today we're studying weight. Now if one cartons weight is one pound and I buy three and a half more, then what do I have in grams?
Student: *Raises hand*
Math Teacher: *Points to student* Yes?
Student: A problem that will kill you, smoker
Math Teacher: -_- Moving on...Now students, if I have eight cakes that each weigh half a pound and I add whip topping to the parte superior, arriba and the added topping now makes it weigh a pound más *GCO*
Math Teacher:...
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posted by ultimatefredde
I write this last words to reflect my existence. For someone to do something against this evil evil being who is called The Hand.

It's hard to explain my existence, especially since the beginning of it, because suddenly appeared. Do not ask me how, but appeared. The first time I opened my eyes they hurt. It was great light that dazzles me, light that sooner o later I would get used to. I could not move. His feet were glued to a platform. I myself was stuck against a background invisible, as if it were in two dimensions. It was sheer torture, I had a terrible fear, but had not yet begun the...
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posted by jamahl17
we hate nearly the same actions as u girls do

We hate to be forgotten o ignored

We hate when we r left waiting too long

We hate when u dont kiss with us very often

We suspect u when u dont let us meet ur parents

We hate when u keep secrets from us

Compliment us once in a while as u want us to do with u

Share o spend enough time with us otherwise we will get bored and start comparing u with other friends

Learn about our hobies and do them with us and we wil be very grateful and do the same

Most of us really dont care about sex o sleeping with us

If u really want something from us, tell us o give...
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posted by simlover4
A couple weeks hace in religon, my teacher told us something really weird. There are some clinics in the united states that let tu diseño custom babies.
yuo can pick stuff like gender,hair colour,skin colour, eye colour and I think even personality traits.

Some people might actually do that but I think that might not be very seguro for the mother o the baby. There is a bunch of tests and stuff that they have to do and it may result in something going wrong.

Custom-made kids will be achieved through preimplantation genetic diagnosis, o PGD, the procedure used to weed out problem embryos and to allow parents to choose a gender.

In letting parents decide what traits their kids have, doctors will examine the genetic makeup of embryos created in the lab and implant the ones that have the best chance of giving mom and dad what they want.

Weird isn't it?
Intro :

yea mmhm i know these have been publicado alot but i am both insane and depressed and i can help depending on your personality o sumthin like tht. But anyways, just read on. I hope tu like!!! This was written por me! Not taken off anyone else. Thanks for your time lectura my into ;) ~~ XxemolovexX (prefer not to say my real name)

How to cure boredom :

If you're an artist :
Draw! drawing will always help tu feel better. And who knows, over time tu might be able to draw amazingly.

If you're an autor :
Free write! Its always fun to. Write something according to your taste in books.

If tu love...
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posted by KitkatKaysa
Your element: Earth
Your ruling planets: Mercury
Symbol: The Virgin
Your stone: Sapphire
Life Pursuit: To do the right thing
Vibration: Compassionate and caring
Virgo's Secret Desire: To amor and be loved in return

Virgos are often put down badly por many astrologers and written up as being fussy and narrow-minded. But when a Virgo shines, there is practically no sign to match their inner light. An in-tune Virgo is a treat to meet. When a Virgo is confident within themselves they are the most successful, structured and creative of all the signs.

Many Virgos can be found working in...
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posted by goddessoflife
I started a Language contest on the respuestas spot in this group. Here are the winners:

Round 1) Winner: darkmintoutau
Language: Greek
Όταν η ζωή σου δίνει το λεμόνι, κάνει το χυμό πορτοκαλιού και στη συνέχεια, καθίστε πίσω και αναρωτιέμαι πώς το κάνατε. Και:
Είμαστε αυστηρότερο από ό, τι σε λιπαρές ουσίες τύπος στο καλσόν!
When life gives tu lemons, make naranja jugo, jugo de and then sit back and wonder how tu did. And: We're tighter than a fat guy in tights!

Round 2) Winner: xXxJDloverxXx
Language: Basque
benetan behar dut off lortzeko webgune honetan!
I really need to get off this site!

Round 3) Open.
posted by kitkat709477
He only has one remo, oar in the water.
A few clowns short of a circus.
A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
A few beers short of a six-pack.
Dumber than a box of hair.
A few peas short of a casserole.
Doesn't have all her cornflakes in one box.
The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead.
One frutas Loop shy of a full bowl.
One taco short of a combination plate.
A few feathers short of a whole duck.
All foam, no beer.
The cheese slid off her cracker.
Body por Fisher, brains por Mattel.
Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
He fell out of the Stupid tree...
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posted by MovieManiac95
 Are tu MAD!?
Are You MAD!?
-Jumped And Hit Nothing
-Fell UP The Stairs
-Eaten your hand
-Swallowed nothing but choked anyways
-Gone Without Blinking
-Scratched An Itch That Was Never There
-Craved Cake but ate cereal
-Wished to fly, but had wings all along
-Skipped Without Moving
-Talked without talking
-Looked at nothing
-Wished for school to be over, but miss it in the end
-eaten a cookie in your dream and tasted it


If you're wondering what that was all about,
it was merely an introduction to my strange-ness,
and it's a...
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posted by nessienjake
Was there really an official
seven wonders of the world?
What are they?"
There certainly were, although most of them are gone, lost to the mists of history. Although most people know that a lista exists, few can name them. The lista of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World was originally compiled around the segundo century B.C. These "wonders" rivaled those created por nature in their size, majesty, and beauty. Six of the seven wonders no longer stand, having been destroyed por natural disaster o por humans. In chronological order, the Seven Wonders were:

1) The Great Pyramid of Giza -
A gigantic...
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posted by nessienjake
From A Mother With amor (funny)
Dear Child,

I am escritura this slow because I know that tu can't read fast.

We don't live where we did when tu left home.

Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your inicial so we moved.

I won't be able to send tu the address, as the last family that lived here took the house numbers when they left so that they wouldn't have to change their address.

This place is real nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure if it works too well though.

Last week I put a load in, pulled the chain, and haven't seen them since.

The weather...
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posted by boomerlover
Yo Mama So Stupid I told her drinks were on the house...so she went and got a ladder...

Yo mama's so fat, the shadow of her butt weighs 50 pounds.

Yo mama so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went inicial and got 16 friends.

Yo mama so stupid when your dad dicho it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon.

Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!

Yo mama so stupid she took a ruler to cama to see how long she slept.

Yo mama so stupid she estola free bread.

Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio.

Yo mama so skinny she turned sideways and...
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posted by xneville_rocksx
Customer: I'm trying to connect to the Internet with your CD, but it just
doesn't work. What am I doing wrong?
Tech support: OK, you've got the CD in the CD drive, right?
Customer: Yeah....
Tech support: And what sort of computer are tu using?
Customer: Computer? Oh no, I haven't got a computer. It's in the CD player
and all I get is weird noises. Listen.....
Tech support: Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!!


Tech support: What kind of computer do tu have?
Female customer: A white one...


Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
Tech support: Have tu tried pushing the...
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posted by bubble_babe
Ok Frist i have to do all this misceláneo crap then i can post them sooooo read the RANDOM!

()_() Help this buuny
(+.+) take over the
() () WORLD! and if tu dont.
He'll kill you!

yhul;op - my cat tryed to say 'hi' xD

Omg my bunny fell asleep in my gatos litter box xD XD

Ummmmm what else, ou, my lil sis is trying to ride my horse........>:( NO1 RIDES BEAKEY OTHER THEN MEH! SHE IS GOING DOWN!

God other then me being pissed right now and waiting to post misceláneo pics what else should i do?

Uhhhhhh......The onley normale día i had was a monday.

my cat eats dog food

monkeys ate Miley C.

Lets see if i can post the pics now.
 just poke-her face xD
just poke-her face xD
 OMG lets save tarzan!
OMG lets save tarzan!
 shhhhh! hes lectura
shhhhh! hes reading
 OMG he look like my sparta!
OMG he look like my sparta!
 Rub a dub dub in the tub
Rub a dub dub in the tub
 this is to good
this is to good
posted by shiriny
-chocolate kills dogs! True, chocolate affects a dog's corazón and nervous system. A few ounces is enough to kill a small sized dog.

-Ketchup was sold in the 1830's as a medicine.

-Leonardo da Vinci could write with one hand and draw with the other at the same time.

-Leonardo da Vinci invented scissors. Also, it took him 10 years to paint Mona Lisa's lips.

-Marilyn Monroe had six toes on one foot.

-A cockroach can live for 10 days without a head

-Brains are más active sleeping than watching TV

-There are más chickens than people in the world

-The thumbnail grows the slowest, and the middle nail grows...
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posted by TDIlover226
1# wait till there talking on the phone and say "your talking to that hooker again arn't you, I know she has problems but theres no need to go all phycaitrist on her.

2# stand siguiente to her and go "toast?" and wait like your waiting for an answer, then go "hello, arn't tu even gonna answer?" wait till they say what? then go "well, tu need an aointment to go to that hair stylist", then wait again for them to say something else and go "YOU NEVER RESPECTED ME!" and run out of the room.

3# (this ones for boys) wait until your sister is talking with friends then run up and sit between them and go...
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posted by Kyssmig
Sherlock Detective reviewed the information they had on the case so far.

A lady named Nikki was found shot and they already had a lista of suspects - Andrew , Jordan, Samuel, Tarun and Dempsey.
Killer is a fan of sherlock and chalenge him por leaving notes at various places.

* The first was found in a toilet room.
* The segundo was found in an art room.
* The third was in a restroom.
* the fourth in an underwater room.
* The fifth at the no smoking room.

All of the notes read the same thing, 'The clues are where tu find the notes.' Yet, nothing was found at anyplace the notes were.
Sherlock the genius , immediately solved the case.

Who was the killer ?
As of 2008, Harry Potter libros have sold over 400 million copies and have been translated into 67 languages.i
A picture of Gandalf the Grey (from The Lord of the Rings) can be seen in the collection of great wizards in Professor Dumbledore’s study in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.f
Author J. K. Rowling recently revealed that Dumbledore is gay and he had a crush on the wizard Grindelwald, whom he later defeated in a wizard duel.a
As every Potter fan knows, Dementors are deadly, magical, wraith-like creatures. Rowling revealed that they represent depression and that they were based on...
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