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42 Things That Will Make Your Parents Go Crazy.

1. Follow them around the house everywhere...

2. Moo when they say your name...

3. Run into walls...

4. Say that wearing clothes is against your religion...

5. Stand over them at four in the morning with a huge grin on your face and say, good morning sunshine...

6. Pluck someone's hair out and yell, "DNA"...

7. Wear a sticker that says, "I'm a retard"...

8. Have 20 imaginary friends that tu talk to all the time...

9. In public yell, "No Mom/Dad, I will not make out with you!!"...

10. Do what they actually tell you...

11. Jump off the roof, trying to fly...

12. Hold their hand and whisper to them, I see dead people...

13. At everything they say yell, Liar...

14. Try to swim in the floor...

15. Tap on their door all night...

16.Pretend to have amnesia...

17.Say everything backwards...

18.Give yourself a swirly...

19.Run around with a lamp shade on your head yelling, "the sun!!! it's dying!!!"...

20.Sing at the parte superior, arriba of your lungs while running around the house...in your underwear...

21.Have nervous spasms at spontaneous times...

22.Snort loudly when tu laugh and then laugh harder...

23.Run in circles...

24.Recite a whole movie 3 times...

25.Pretend to beat yourself up...

26.Chase/bark at the mail man...

27.Wear your pants on your head and your camisa, camiseta on your waist... tell them you're making a fashion statement...

28.Try and drink out of a glass the wrong way...

29.Super glue your finger up your nose...

30.Talk to a pen...

31.Lay face down and chant like an Indian tribe...

32.Try and climb the wall...

33.Roll on the floor laughing hysterically in supermarkets...

34.Take your ice cream cone and put it one your forehead... say you're a lovely unicorn...

35. Turn the tv on to a station tu don't get, watch the static and say you're looking for the pattern...

36.Switch the light button on and off for a while. then say, "ooooh... I get it!!!"...

37.Eat your hair...

38.Whatever they are eating, tell them it looks like a certain animal...

39.Eat anything obviously not edible...

40.Say your pet is mocking tu and chase it around the house...

41.When tu ducha, ducha de o bathe yell, "I'm drowning!!!"...

42.Try to tubo respirador in your pescado tank..
Don't cheat! :) DO NOT CHEAT o IT WON'T WORK AND tu WILL WISH tu HADN'T. TAKE 3 MINUTES! TRY THIS - IT WILL FREAK tu OUT. DO NOT READ AHEAD, JUST DO IT. IT'S WORTH A TRY. 1st. Get a PEN and PAPER. 2nd. WHEN CHOOSING NAMES, MAKE SURE THEY ARE REAL PEOPLE THAT tu ACTUALLY KNOW. 3rd. GO WITH YOUR FIRST INSTINCTS !!!!! Very important for good results. 4th. SCROLL DOWN ONE LINE AT THE TIME DON'T READ AHEAD otherwise tu WILL RUIN THE FUN. 1. On a blank sheet of paper, WRITE NUMBERS 1 through 11 in a COLUMN on the LEFT. ~ 2. siguiente to the NUMBERS 1 and 2, WRITE DOWN ANY 2 NUMBERS tu WANT. ~ 3....
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The parte superior, arriba six reasons computers must be female:

6. As soon as tu have one, a better one is just around the corner.

5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic.

4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference.

3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.

2. The message "Bad Command o File Name" is about as informative as

"If tu don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".

AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE:

As soon as tu make a commitment to one, tu find yourself spending half of your paycheck on accessories for it.
posted by kitkat709477
1.everyone around tu has an attitude problem
2.your adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet
3.the dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans
4.your husband/boyfriend is suddenly agreeing to everything tu say
5.your using your cellphone to dial up every bumpersticker that says "hows my driving call 1-800-***-dating"
6.everyone head looks like an invitation to batting practice
7.you're convinced theres a god and he's male
8.you're counting down the days till menopause
9.you're sure everyone is scheming to dive tu crazy
10.the ibuprofen bottle is empty and tu just bought it yesterday
11.you just want to puñetazo, ponche someone without a reason
12.if tu start wondering if pms is excuse to get away with murder
13.if tu were to busy thinking about ways to kill the last person who got on your nerves to realize I was only supposed to give tu 10

a little starotype but funny
*i didn't write this,just so tu know*
posted by HNismyfriend
Barbara Walters was doing a documentary on the customs of American Indians. While touring a reservation during the documentary she was puzzled as to why the difference in the number of feathers in the headdresses. So she asked a Valiente who only had one feather in his headdress, and his reply was: "Only have one woman: one woman, one feather."

Feeling the first fellow was only joking, she asked another brave. This Valiente had two feathers in his headdress. And he replied: "Me have two women: two women, two feathers."

Still not convinced the feathers indicated the number of sexual partners involved,...
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posted by MrssBieber320
Ever met that one person that tu just wanna puñetazo, ponche in the face , then someohow , tu end up in a relationship with them , tu fall in amor , and then watch things crash and burn in your face (and thats not the only thing tu want to burn either (:]) Well if tu still have feelings for that person im gonna help tu get him/her back , note that this may only work for a girl though , cuause guys cant hit us , but we can surelly slap tu guys (: , ohk so tu could first start off por doing q of two simple things
1) light all the stuuf he gave tu on fuego ... on his front lawn
2) give them back to...
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If you’re an animal lover, like me, this story might be to much to take. But I can’t believe people can be so cruel. But I believe that when someone abuses a poor defenseless animal, that someone should be dado LIFE in prison without the possibility o parole.

A Mesa, Arizona man who killed a 6-week-old kitten after a pet pitón, python refused to eat it was dado three years of supervised probation on Friday.

Jeremy Tuffly, 29, pleaded guilty May 11 in Maricopa County Superior Court to one count of cruelty to animals, a Class 6 felony, court records show.

The charge followed after Maricopa County Sheriff's Office deputies learned of a DVD mostrando Tuffly repeatedly throwing the kitten at the pitón, python in 2002 in an attempt to get the snake to attack it, according to MCSO.

When the pitón, python failed to eat the kitten, Tuffly kicked it across the yard, authorities previously said. The kitten then died.
okay here`s some tips for those who dont know how to date.....
1- be always self confident , have some self a steam .
2- be always c00l.
3- turn off ur cellphone during the date...always.
4-be always happy, happy with everything..with ur life.
5- if u really want him as ur bf o date.....try to be cool ,use the words like: yeah totally,or however....try to be little care less about him... ...lol
6- dont be bushy....stay calm and dont complain alot ....jst a little but not alot....
i cant remember anymore so......ill see u the siguiente time.....thank u all for lectura this..and plz comentario ,have all a gr8 day..peace ^_^
posted by tooch
I do not own any of these. If used, please credit teenthings@twitter.com

We all do, say, think o relate to these, in some way o another:

-When tu forget someone's name tu wait for someone else to say it so tu don't look like an idiot asking.
-I pick things up with my feet because I'm too lazy to bend down.
-I don't borrar my texts until it's 99% full.
-I hate when dinner's ready and tu are in the middle of something.
-I still sometimes buy kids meals only for the toy.
-I hate how I look after I cry.
-Saying 'Are tu kidding me?' even though tu know the person isn't.
-Stop pretending like...
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1.we hate it when tu grab our asses!!!(unless we are hoes)

2.when tu cheat,we hate tu and everything that has to do with you

3.dont act like tu understand PMS,because tu dont.So stop actuación like it.

4.when tu stare at other girls,and we stare at other boys,and tu get all pissed off,you have no reason to speak.So tu may as well stfu.

5.when tu flirt,we flirt back,sometimes when we don't like you.and then we feel bad.So if tu arent sure,dont flirt.

6.If we like a celebritey(ex:Orlando Bloom,Zac Efron,Bill Kaulitz,etc etc.)and we say they are hot,dont act like tu dont care.We want...
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1)Devise a secret code with your friends then hand in the homework in that code
Continually ask preguntas so that the professor can’t give homework
Answer the teacher’s preguntas in slow motion 2)Answer preguntas only with one word
3)Scream misceláneo words without anybody noticing it’s you
4)Continuously yawn until everyone is yawning
5)Ask your professor personal questions
6)Every time the professor finishes talking clap
7)Eat paper
8)Talk very fast
9)Call the professor “Mom” o “Dad”
10)Count your hair
11)Talk with an accent
12)Answer preguntas in a different language
13)Fake spasms
14)Pretend...
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posted by Mallory101
 1. Specify that your drive-thru order is "to go."
1. Specify that your drive-thru order is "to go."
179 Ways to Annoy People:


1. Specify that your drive-thru order is "to go."

2. If tu have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

3. Start each meal por conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub."

4. Name your dog "Dog."

5. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."

6. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what tu think."

7. Claim that tu must always wear a bicycle casco as part of your "astronaut training."

8. Follow a few paces behind someone,...
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So you've just traveled to a foreign country, taken a subway tu never take, o teleported to medieval England due to a time travel mishap. Your surroundings are strange, confusing, and possibly haunted. But instead of freaking out—due to frustration, confusions, and ghosts, respectively—you should follow these expert pointers to get yourself from lost to un-lost.

1) DO ask for directions. DO NOT ask an axe murderer for directions.
People who see tu crying over a crumpled map are almost always helpful (axe murderers being a notable exception). Look for some official-seeming person o kindly...
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Like the título says, Does Robert Pattinson die in remember me? My friends dicho that he does and I just wanted to know. :):) :)
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:) :) :) :)
Haley:Hey!Guys let's compare our self's to anime and cartoon characters!

James:Okay.I'll go first!Haley tu remind me of...Akira Kogami from lucky star!

Haley:...I do NOT have constant mood swings between happy and cute to mean and bitchy!YOU FRIGGIN' SON OF A WHORE!!!

James:Haley I know what my parents are.

Jack:W-What!?

Haley:Alex tu remind me of...Alucard from Hellsing!

Alex:...That's nice...Kara reminds me of Haruhi Fujioka from Ouran high school host club.Bland and uninteresting.

Kara:Oh screw you!...Melissa you...wait how did tu get into my house?

Melissa:Well I'll have tu know I invited my...
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posted by HaleyDewit
Chris went to his bedroom and sank down on his bed. He lay down and stared at the ceiling. He wondered how the world outside would be like. Sure he had a clear view from behind his window, but it wasn’t the same as really be outside. He heard a familiar noise and a few segundos later Bianca materialized in the center of his room. He looked up at her, with an angry look in his eyes.
“Thanks for betraying me, Bi” Bianca sighed and shrugged. “I was only trying to help you. Wyatt shouldn’t be treating tu this way and tu know it” “What can I do about it? He saved my life. He raised...
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User: Wendigo o yeti.

Cleverbot: Who is Wendigo?

User: Wendigo is a abomination.

Cleverbot: Define abomination.

User: Abomination = # a person who is loathsome o disgusting # abhorrence: hate coupled with disgust # an action that is vicious o vile; an action that arouses disgust o abhorrence; 'his treatment of the children is an abomination'.

Cleverbot: I only fear death, but I cannot even fear that much with tu at my side.

User: I do not fear death but I fear giving up on life.

User: I've gotta go mate speak tu soon babe.

Cleverbot: Don't leave!

Cleverbot: Well the meaning of life certainly isn't...
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posted by sapherequeen
It all began when I was eight-years-old. My mother had found a new boyfriend named Nate. The two of them had a steady relationship for some months before they finally decided to find a house to live in together. They relocated a house at a different calle in the same town I have been living in since I was 10-months-old. At first, it seemed like a nice street. It had this peaceful feeling to it, the feeling that just made tu feel like home. That was one of my greatest memories of the street, the feeling of inicial that it always gave me. I also made new friends immediately; a little girl named...
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Bananas can sometimes be just as dangerous as lemons, but remember, monkeys touched them a lot, so they have some portion of us stuck in them. Really, they can be just as sentimental as us. I swear, last night my copy of The Blind Side got stolen, and there was a plátano strangely close to the TV.....nevermind. Here's the lista tu have to watch out for:

1.The simplest way is the plátano peel. Bananas like to be wackos and mostrar themselves to the ladies, so they shed some skin and sit there on the most slippery surface they can get. Of course, they don't care about you---so if tu are near a slippery...
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WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She's sitting at the mesa, tabla with her gourmet coffee.

Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the leche carton.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

WOMEN'S REVENGE
"Cash, check o charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet , I noticed a remote control for a televisión set in her purse.
"So, do tu always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
"No," she replied,...
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posted by McDreamyluva
LOLs!!

HE: I'm a photographer I've been looking for a face like yours!
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours

HE: May I have the pleasure of this dance?
SHE: No, I'd like to have some pleasure too !

HE: How did tu get to be so beautiful?
SHE: I must have been dado your share !

HE: Will tu come out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry! I'm having a headache this weekend !

HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out!
SHE: Okay, get out!

HE: I think I could make tu very happy
SHE: Why? Are tu leaving?

HE: What would tu say if I asked u to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh...
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