Can I get an opinion? Past o Present tense? *See details
For my fanfiction I'm going back and forth between the two. On one hand I feel like present tense fits the theme of the fic but I've noticed that many readers think that present tense pulls them out of the story. I've written two versions of part of my fic would tu mind telling me which tu like more?
The air is rotten beyond reparation, centuries could pass and Azula feels as though the smell will never leave. At this point, it has probably been weaved into the atmosphere of the place. Decaying meat and death never truly leaves a place. Even if the odor was to fade in ages to come, there would still be residue of what had once been there. Even if she manages to leave the place, a part of her tormented soul will probably remain, etched into the sick energy of the place.
Her cheek is pressed against the ground and she can’t feel anything anymore. She can’t even remember how she got here. She just knows that she’s been here for a while and has long since dado up on the notion that someone might be looking for her. Who would? She has no one left who would really care. She can hear the raspy breathing and knows that the suffering will begin again shortly. She closes her eyes and tires to shift her position.