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Anxiety issues? Depression? What's going on with me?

I don't know. I don't know what's going on.
Sometimes, not often but sometimes I get so overwhelmed with loneliness that I cry.
Sometimes, I just sit and stare for mins.
Sometimes, I think I'm worthless.
Sometimes, I dwell on all my past sin and think God is so far away.
Sometimes, I feel so alone and like I always will be.

When someone comes and shows even a little understanding I cling to them because I feel like I have to. I'm scared to lose that.
I have trust issues with boys because one once told me "all I wanted from tu was sex"

My cousin passed away in Aug so I'm still dealing with that and wondering if the sorrow of that has anything to do.
My mother abandoned me when I was a baby and I know I have abandonment issues. She left my brother though too and he seems to be fine.

I'm needy, I'm clingy, I'm emotional.
I over-think things. I overreact.
I'm 20 so I can't wait to have my own apartment but when I imagine what it will be like, I literally picture myself just sitting on the sofá wrapped up in a blanket and staring at nothing.

I don't know if I have something wrong with me. Like a condition, but I don't want to think that I do. What if I'm just like this?

Also. . .I don't know if this effects how I am but my mom smoked when she was pregnant with me but not my brother. I don't think it was hard drugs but I don't know what it was.

comentario anything but please be nice.
 SarahCorine posted hace más de un año
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misceláneo Respuestas

MineTurtle5 said:
Wow. I've been there before, but not with those circumstances. I don't know exactly what tu feel, but jesús does. Turn to Him. He's waiting for tu to tell Him how tu feel, and He's waiting to mostrar tu how much He loves you.
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posted hace más de un año 
_Laugh_ said:
*sigh* Depression. We all have been depressed. Cuz, everybody has a private world where they can be alone. Believe me, I know how it feels like. I'm bullied at school, my mother hates me, and I lost my best friend. It hurts. But when I was drowning, and nobody saw me struggle, música was my only friend. So my consejos is to listen to música and ignore the world.
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posted hace más de un año 
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Thank tu very much. I know everyone gets sad from time to time. It's normal, but I was starting to feel anxious all the time. And thank tu for the song. I like Eminem.
SarahCorine posted hace más de un año
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Yay. Don't worry sweetie, it'll all be okay in the end. If its not okay, it's not the end
_Laugh_ posted hace más de un año
SeeUV3 said:
What your feeling...I understand it I have depression I feel lonely I feel worthless my father abandoned me and I have terrible trust issues with guys . Trust me im clingy has well and really emotional and I over reacted to a point people think im insane . And I to feel like I will always be alone due to anxiety and I think tu may have depression cause that's what I have
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posted hace más de un año 
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Sound like tu might just be my twin. Everything tu said, I could have dicho as well except for the father. It was my mother. First, I'm sorry that tu have depression. It hurts. Second, thank tu for sharing this with me. It makes me feel like I'm not alone. And third, what do tu do for it? Did tu have it checked por a doctor o take pills for it?
SarahCorine posted hace más de un año
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i have to go to threapy its getting worse
SeeUV3 posted hace más de un año
Sir_Kiwi said:
You're not the only person that deals with depression, don't worry. I don't think there's anything wrong with you. Everyone gets depressed at least once in their life.

tu can maybe just sit it out and wait it through. o if tu feel really depressed, smile. Smiling actually makes tu feel better.

If tu live through everything and your life actually gets better, everything will seem like a much más happier place than before.
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posted hace más de un año 
mizorewannabe said:
I don't know, either. I think there's depression within me.

Everything tu described is what happened to me, too. Except for everything mom and dudes.

My grandmother passed away 4/4/13.

This year. This año was supposed to be special. But she died of liver cancer. The doctors dicho that was the most painful cancer to go through, but in my opinion, all cancers are supposed to be painful. How did your cousin die?

To escape the pain, I try to be fun, ya know. Watch funny videos, say corny jokes; those kind of things.

Look! A funny video from mah favorito! anime!
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posted hace más de un año 
springely said:
Go big o go home, we're all gonna make it one day.
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posted hace más de un año 
Otaku_Girl4890 said:
It's probably your past just now hitting you. I feel alone too, like no matter who I'm with, I'm still alone in the mind and body. I've learned to live with my feelings, excepting that I'll always feel alone. I have very high self confidence despite that though. tu might be suffering from depression.
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posted hace más de un año 
Zeppie said:
I'm sorry about what has happened to tu :(

What you're dealing with is most definitely depression. Please, do get help. Keeping it all to yourself will do no good at all. Talk to a professional about it, book an appointment. As a last resort they can give tu medication to help.

To help distract tu from it, focus on your hobbies. Got any hobbies like drawing o something like that? Focus on that and improve to keep your mind busy.

I can relate. My depression stemmed from my social anxiety which is still quite bad. I used to cry every día because I couldn't reach out and just plain communicate with people. I had no social life and I would just come inicial from school each día and lock myself in my room and cry... then come out for dinner, then go straight back to my room and cry myself to sleep every night. I got help and no it didn't 'cure' it, but it helped me gain perspective. What I need to focus on is dealing with my social anxiety, because that is really taking over my life :(

Just remember that no matter how alone tu feel, tu are still worth while. Life is going to kick tu down all the time and you're gonna think that no one cares and tu are alone. You're not. Just embrace and acknowledge that the way you're living right now is not mentally healthy, so talk to someone before it gets worse.

I know what you're going through, coming from an 18 año old girl with social anxiety trying to survive university... it's difficult, but we'll get there :)
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posted hace más de un año 
Book-Freak said:
tu should go and talk to your doctor. My mum is going through this right now and she says tu should go and talk to your doctor. They will be able to prescribe ou with some anti-depressants and organise counciling for tu to deal with your depression and anxiety. It's okay, you're not alone, but tu need to deal with this. People can and will help tu and if tu ever need someone to talk to my bandeja de entrada is alway open.
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posted hace más de un año 
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