HELP hat a good way o start off adn end a speech!!!!!

Once Upon A Time
The End

:D

I need tu speech topic

1: learn to spell

2: tu need good topic and teachers like it when tu use big and complicated words.

Start: Good [morning, afternoon, evening], citizens of [whatever].Today, I would like to present to tu a speech on [whatever].
End: And so, (sum up the topic of your paper). Thank tu for listening to my speech, and have a wonderful [morning, afternoon, evening]

Why cant I think of something like this when Im actually trying to write a speech for school? :/

Start: I'm so fresh tu can suck my nuts

End: Swag