"Boner, catch this disk." "Boner, quit humping the neighbors leg." "Boner, stop peeing on the lawn."
This way when tu loose your dog tu can yell "Boner!" without looking peverted.
Also, if the dog runs away a lot and it is female, tu can name it Virginity. When asking people if they have seen your dog tu can say, "I lost my virginity and I can't find it."
