Ok before tu read the fanfic I want tu guys to know that I will only be posting the first chapter as of right now. I know I publicado it a while hace but I made some changes to it. I also publicado it to get some feedback. This is only the first chapter of the first 1/4 of the story. The amount of pages in the first 1/4 of the story is actually 20 pages, so thats why I am posting it chapter por chapter. Feel free to tell me what tu think and If tu have any suggestions o see any errors please let me know. I am turning this in as part of one of my assignments in school and I would like to make it the best it can possibly get. Thanks and I hope tu enjoy. :)
10 years after the war
Lucy
Chapter 1:
It was a nice, golden día in October, and I was flying above the park to make sure no one was in the way of our game. “All clear, guys!”
“Aw yeah!” called Daredevil, who was on the other side of the field setting up the goals. “I amor a good game of nube soccer!”
“A-are tu sure its s-safe?” stammered Lucky from below. “I d-don’t think this is s-such a good idea. I th-think I’m gonna go home.”
“Oh, no tu don’t!” dicho Daredevil. He flew right into Luckys' face, startling the light purple pegasi. “I need tu on my team. I can’t do it without you, whenever you're on my team we always win. tu got that, missy?” Lucky blinked, then reluctantly nodded her head. “Good. Now, get yourself up here and give me fifty laps!”
I chuckled at their antics. “Don’t be so hard on her,” I chimed, flicking my light blonde mane out of my face. “She doesn’t have to play.”
"Hey, she isn't called Lucky for nothing!" Daredevil remarked. He snorted like a bull, blowing his unruly black-and-red mane out from his face. His eyes, a crystalline blue a few shades lighter than Luckys', shined definitely.
Ok, lets stop there so I can introduce tu to my friends and I. I’m Lucy. I have a blonde mane and tail, and a white coat. My cutie mark is a pencil crossed over a pen. Its for my amor of writing.
My friend, Daredevil, is one of those guys who are a good, trustworthy friend to have, but a horrible enemy. He's naive and quick to anger, but he can be pleasant when its only tu and him. His mother once told me he was a little piece of sunshine before the war started, but they went through some pretty rough stuff after their house was bombed. His mane used to be a deep sea blue, but he dyed it black and red to represent the blood and ash of the war.
Lucky here is the shy one of the group, scarred por the deaths of her parents. She’s kind of like a quiet little rabbit who dives in their hole if tu startle her. She hangs out with us a lot, as her adoptive parents are often busy struggling with the little comprar they run back in the city. Despite all of her misfortunes, her cutie mark is a horseshoe from the luck she has when playing games o competitions.
I rolled my eyes at Daredevil, and opened my muzzle to remark, but was cut off por an annoyingly high-pitched voice.
“Well, well, well, look whos playing a game of nube soccer. I bet I could block the goal blindfolded, knowing how well tu play.”
Out of the trees came April and her Unicorn clique. “Hah! I bet I can kick it farther that tu ever could,” she sneered.
Daredevil turned around slowly, a deep snarl reverberating from his chest. “What was that?” he asked calmly. Uh-oh. Daredevil is never calm towards unicornios unless...
“I dicho I can kick a ball farther than tu could,” she repeated, admiring her manicured hooves.
“I’ll take that as a challenge,” he replied coolly. “Lucky, bring me a ball. Any one will do.” With a nod of her head, Lucky flew off to find a durable ball for nube soccer.
“What are tu doing?!” I murmured into his ear.
“Sticking up for pegasi, thats what,” he whispered back. "Hey!" he shouted to the unicorns. "Go find a ball, snots. Get that leather one tu always use, o something." He turned back to me and snickered. I blinked, confused. He grinned. “April’s going to be in for a surprise.”
Lucky came back with the ball. It was rosado, rosa and sparkly, and had grinning purple hippos all over it. I almost laughed, but I held it in. tu don’t laugh in front of Daredevil in public, unless he laughs first.
“Here,” she dicho shyly. “It was the only one I could find.”
Daredevil glared at the ball with utter contempt, then sighed. “It's good enough. Just siguiente time, try and find one less...” He paused for a moment, gathering his words. “Girly.”
Lucky avoided his gaze, realizing her mistake. “Are tu done yet?” barked April. “I don’t have all day. I have a mani-pedi at 3:00, and I don’t intend to miss it.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Daredevil huffed. He turned to me, chuckling quietly. “Oh, she's gonna need más than a mani-pedi when we're done with her.”
I frowned. The rivalry between the pegasi and unicorn I found plain dumb. Many years ago, unicornios and pegasi had banded together to fight off a great force of demonic creatures called Whorlings. Apparently, there was another group called Earth ponies, but they have been extinct for so long no one really believes in them anymore, except me. After the Whorlings were defeated, secrets about spies and a mishap among the generals were revealed, and political infirmities arose at a vulnerable time.
"Who's gonna ref?" I asked Daredevil. He lifted his head, scanning the crowd at the park. His eyes fell on a tall pegasi with a soft pale rosado, rosa mane gracing her shoulders and a sunset naranja coat. She had a hardened look in her gaze, but a glimmer of kindness and another emotion that I couldn't name shone in her lavender eyes as she saw us. Daredevil smirked. "Hey, Scootaloo! Can ya ref our game?" Scootaloo's hooves clicked sharply on the pavement as she left the sidewalk. She stood, intimidating, over us. Smiling stonily, she said, “Cloud soccer? This’ll be interesting.”
“Ok, here are the rules,” Scootaloo called out in her military voice. Living with arco iris Dash, a leader in the National Pegasi Army, really rubbed off on her. “Each team will elect a person to kick their respective ball. Each team will only get one chance to kick it as far as tu can, and tu have to make it past the goal. The poni, pony with the farthest kick past the goal wins. Magic is not permitted. Any questions?"
A small unicorn with a stubby snout and orange, well-kept mane raised her hoof.
“What if we don’t want them to just por us ice cream, but have them pay for a full mani-pedi as well?” she said. The unicornios whispered among themselves. Daredevil just smirked.
‘I’m sure thats alright, as long as its OK with the other team. Is that ok with you?” Scootaloo faced us.
“Bring it on.” I declared.
“It’s settled then,” shouted Scootaloo. “I will give tu all three minutos to decide who will be kicking and who’s not.
“I’ll do it,” Daredevil volunteered.
Lucky muttered something then looked expectantly at us, thinking that we had heard her. “What was that? I can’t hear you?” I questioned.
She muttered something again but it was still too faint to be heard.
“Didn’t quite catch that.”
She took a deep breath. “I would like to do it.”
“You?! Hah!” Daredevil laughed. Lucky looked at the ground. I poked him in the ribs. “What? She can’t kick a ball a foot. tu know that.”
“Maybe we should give her a chance.” I proposed. “It’ll sure give her some confidence.” I gave him perrito, cachorro dog eyes. No one can say no to my perrito, cachorro dog eyes.
“Ok fine,” he grumbled. “Lucky can be our kicker.”
“The three minutos are up. Send your representatives up to the center of the field.” Lucky flew to the center. April followed, Scootaloo glaring pointedly at her. Yeah, arco iris Dash had definitely rubbed off on her.
“Good luck,” April whispered in Lucky’s ear. “You're gonna need it.”
“The pegasi are first. Take your mark.” Lucky picked up the soccer ball and placed it in front of her right hoof.
“On your mark... get set... KICK!”
Lucky kicked the ball. My mouth dropped open. It had landed on the other side of the field. Exactly a quarter of a mile. April smirked. “Oh, thats nothing.” She levitated her ball so it was in front of her left foot.
“On your mark... get set... KICK!”
I turned around to see a swarm of bees the size of a sandía -a very ripe one, mind you- come out of the soccer ball she kicked. “Wh-whats that?” yelled one of April’s sidekicks over the buzz of the bees.
“Oh, its just a swarm of wasps,” taunted Dare. “I think tu may of disturbed their nest so tu may wanna run for your lives if tu don’t wanna ruin your pretty little hooves. Besides tu have a mani-pedi at three and I don’t think tu wanna miss it.”
Suddenly the swarm came flying down of the Unicorns. A blood curdling scream came out of April’s mouth as one of the wasps stung her back leg. One scream after another came out of her mouth as she started to sprint away from the Wasps.
She and her posse scampered on the grass, their hooves taking them all the way back to Canterlot. “You did that on purpose!” She yelled over her shoulder amidst screams of terror from her friends. “This isn’t over! tu will pay for this!” As soon as they were gone, all of us burst out laughing. Even Scootaloo.
Dare chuckled as they ran away. “Serves tu right tu Unicorns! No one messes with these pegasi!” He turned to us. “Hey lets all go the Ariels to get some ice cream to celebrate our win!”
“Sounds good to me,” I called, leaving the field, recalling their expressions and screams as we flew.
10 years after the war
Lucy
Chapter 1:
It was a nice, golden día in October, and I was flying above the park to make sure no one was in the way of our game. “All clear, guys!”
“Aw yeah!” called Daredevil, who was on the other side of the field setting up the goals. “I amor a good game of nube soccer!”
“A-are tu sure its s-safe?” stammered Lucky from below. “I d-don’t think this is s-such a good idea. I th-think I’m gonna go home.”
“Oh, no tu don’t!” dicho Daredevil. He flew right into Luckys' face, startling the light purple pegasi. “I need tu on my team. I can’t do it without you, whenever you're on my team we always win. tu got that, missy?” Lucky blinked, then reluctantly nodded her head. “Good. Now, get yourself up here and give me fifty laps!”
I chuckled at their antics. “Don’t be so hard on her,” I chimed, flicking my light blonde mane out of my face. “She doesn’t have to play.”
"Hey, she isn't called Lucky for nothing!" Daredevil remarked. He snorted like a bull, blowing his unruly black-and-red mane out from his face. His eyes, a crystalline blue a few shades lighter than Luckys', shined definitely.
Ok, lets stop there so I can introduce tu to my friends and I. I’m Lucy. I have a blonde mane and tail, and a white coat. My cutie mark is a pencil crossed over a pen. Its for my amor of writing.
My friend, Daredevil, is one of those guys who are a good, trustworthy friend to have, but a horrible enemy. He's naive and quick to anger, but he can be pleasant when its only tu and him. His mother once told me he was a little piece of sunshine before the war started, but they went through some pretty rough stuff after their house was bombed. His mane used to be a deep sea blue, but he dyed it black and red to represent the blood and ash of the war.
Lucky here is the shy one of the group, scarred por the deaths of her parents. She’s kind of like a quiet little rabbit who dives in their hole if tu startle her. She hangs out with us a lot, as her adoptive parents are often busy struggling with the little comprar they run back in the city. Despite all of her misfortunes, her cutie mark is a horseshoe from the luck she has when playing games o competitions.
I rolled my eyes at Daredevil, and opened my muzzle to remark, but was cut off por an annoyingly high-pitched voice.
“Well, well, well, look whos playing a game of nube soccer. I bet I could block the goal blindfolded, knowing how well tu play.”
Out of the trees came April and her Unicorn clique. “Hah! I bet I can kick it farther that tu ever could,” she sneered.
Daredevil turned around slowly, a deep snarl reverberating from his chest. “What was that?” he asked calmly. Uh-oh. Daredevil is never calm towards unicornios unless...
“I dicho I can kick a ball farther than tu could,” she repeated, admiring her manicured hooves.
“I’ll take that as a challenge,” he replied coolly. “Lucky, bring me a ball. Any one will do.” With a nod of her head, Lucky flew off to find a durable ball for nube soccer.
“What are tu doing?!” I murmured into his ear.
“Sticking up for pegasi, thats what,” he whispered back. "Hey!" he shouted to the unicorns. "Go find a ball, snots. Get that leather one tu always use, o something." He turned back to me and snickered. I blinked, confused. He grinned. “April’s going to be in for a surprise.”
Lucky came back with the ball. It was rosado, rosa and sparkly, and had grinning purple hippos all over it. I almost laughed, but I held it in. tu don’t laugh in front of Daredevil in public, unless he laughs first.
“Here,” she dicho shyly. “It was the only one I could find.”
Daredevil glared at the ball with utter contempt, then sighed. “It's good enough. Just siguiente time, try and find one less...” He paused for a moment, gathering his words. “Girly.”
Lucky avoided his gaze, realizing her mistake. “Are tu done yet?” barked April. “I don’t have all day. I have a mani-pedi at 3:00, and I don’t intend to miss it.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Daredevil huffed. He turned to me, chuckling quietly. “Oh, she's gonna need más than a mani-pedi when we're done with her.”
I frowned. The rivalry between the pegasi and unicorn I found plain dumb. Many years ago, unicornios and pegasi had banded together to fight off a great force of demonic creatures called Whorlings. Apparently, there was another group called Earth ponies, but they have been extinct for so long no one really believes in them anymore, except me. After the Whorlings were defeated, secrets about spies and a mishap among the generals were revealed, and political infirmities arose at a vulnerable time.
"Who's gonna ref?" I asked Daredevil. He lifted his head, scanning the crowd at the park. His eyes fell on a tall pegasi with a soft pale rosado, rosa mane gracing her shoulders and a sunset naranja coat. She had a hardened look in her gaze, but a glimmer of kindness and another emotion that I couldn't name shone in her lavender eyes as she saw us. Daredevil smirked. "Hey, Scootaloo! Can ya ref our game?" Scootaloo's hooves clicked sharply on the pavement as she left the sidewalk. She stood, intimidating, over us. Smiling stonily, she said, “Cloud soccer? This’ll be interesting.”
“Ok, here are the rules,” Scootaloo called out in her military voice. Living with arco iris Dash, a leader in the National Pegasi Army, really rubbed off on her. “Each team will elect a person to kick their respective ball. Each team will only get one chance to kick it as far as tu can, and tu have to make it past the goal. The poni, pony with the farthest kick past the goal wins. Magic is not permitted. Any questions?"
A small unicorn with a stubby snout and orange, well-kept mane raised her hoof.
“What if we don’t want them to just por us ice cream, but have them pay for a full mani-pedi as well?” she said. The unicornios whispered among themselves. Daredevil just smirked.
‘I’m sure thats alright, as long as its OK with the other team. Is that ok with you?” Scootaloo faced us.
“Bring it on.” I declared.
“It’s settled then,” shouted Scootaloo. “I will give tu all three minutos to decide who will be kicking and who’s not.
“I’ll do it,” Daredevil volunteered.
Lucky muttered something then looked expectantly at us, thinking that we had heard her. “What was that? I can’t hear you?” I questioned.
She muttered something again but it was still too faint to be heard.
“Didn’t quite catch that.”
She took a deep breath. “I would like to do it.”
“You?! Hah!” Daredevil laughed. Lucky looked at the ground. I poked him in the ribs. “What? She can’t kick a ball a foot. tu know that.”
“Maybe we should give her a chance.” I proposed. “It’ll sure give her some confidence.” I gave him perrito, cachorro dog eyes. No one can say no to my perrito, cachorro dog eyes.
“Ok fine,” he grumbled. “Lucky can be our kicker.”
“The three minutos are up. Send your representatives up to the center of the field.” Lucky flew to the center. April followed, Scootaloo glaring pointedly at her. Yeah, arco iris Dash had definitely rubbed off on her.
“Good luck,” April whispered in Lucky’s ear. “You're gonna need it.”
“The pegasi are first. Take your mark.” Lucky picked up the soccer ball and placed it in front of her right hoof.
“On your mark... get set... KICK!”
Lucky kicked the ball. My mouth dropped open. It had landed on the other side of the field. Exactly a quarter of a mile. April smirked. “Oh, thats nothing.” She levitated her ball so it was in front of her left foot.
“On your mark... get set... KICK!”
I turned around to see a swarm of bees the size of a sandía -a very ripe one, mind you- come out of the soccer ball she kicked. “Wh-whats that?” yelled one of April’s sidekicks over the buzz of the bees.
“Oh, its just a swarm of wasps,” taunted Dare. “I think tu may of disturbed their nest so tu may wanna run for your lives if tu don’t wanna ruin your pretty little hooves. Besides tu have a mani-pedi at three and I don’t think tu wanna miss it.”
Suddenly the swarm came flying down of the Unicorns. A blood curdling scream came out of April’s mouth as one of the wasps stung her back leg. One scream after another came out of her mouth as she started to sprint away from the Wasps.
She and her posse scampered on the grass, their hooves taking them all the way back to Canterlot. “You did that on purpose!” She yelled over her shoulder amidst screams of terror from her friends. “This isn’t over! tu will pay for this!” As soon as they were gone, all of us burst out laughing. Even Scootaloo.
Dare chuckled as they ran away. “Serves tu right tu Unicorns! No one messes with these pegasi!” He turned to us. “Hey lets all go the Ariels to get some ice cream to celebrate our win!”
“Sounds good to me,” I called, leaving the field, recalling their expressions and screams as we flew.
Bob Newhart
