Hooray, my first ever HTF fanfic. I've written so many fucking Ni Hao, Kai-Lan related fanfics that I NEED a bloody change of pace. Now, let me give tu the details of how this shit will be run. If a character speaks(more o less), I will be escritura my fanfics here with the characters speaking English, except for the 3 characters that do not speak(Mole, Mime, Cro-Marmot). At least 7 characters will perish. Flippy will not die, but Lumpy is gonna get the most over-the-top death. Maybe por Flippy, tu never know. Feel free to make apoyo bets about who dies first. My corazón is as black as Fliqpy(Evil Flippy)'s soul. I do not mind. I will not ease up on the language if I feel it's necessary. tu HAVE BEEN WARNED. And lastly, Cuddles is a dude. There. Cleared it up.
This episode will feature Flippy(obviously), Giggles, Cuddles, Nutty and Petunia. Other appearances: Pop and Cub(oh god, I have to use baby speak), Lumpy(Public Enemy No. 1.), Splendid, Handy, and Russell. Some of these characters will have no lines, but may be killed with some of the others. Well, here I go with this bloody trainwreck.
*The episode starts out with Giggles and petunia in Flippy's house getting everything ready. From here on, I will have a running dead/alive count.*
Petunia: Flippy is gonna amor this. Hey, Giggles, mind moving those balloons a few inches to your right?
Giggles: Sure. tu may have OCD, but at lest tu know how to throw the perfect party. Why do tu obsess about your own body, as well as everything tu see, being so damn clean, my apparent potty mouth excepted?
Petunia: Because, Giggles, cleanliness is siguiente to Godliness. If not everything is clean, then my OCD takes over and I can't control myself. As for the language, I'm not gonna go and shove soap in everyone's mouths. That's wasteful.
Giggles: Oh. *The scene shifts to Handy trying to work the cashier escritorio at the grocery store. tu see... he has no hands.*
Handy: Come on, tu stupid-ass piece of--
Russell: Need help there, buddy?
Handy: Look at me. I have no hands. How does someone like me get a job that requires tu use your hands IF tu DON'T FUCKING HAVE ANY?
Russell: I'm not doing much better in that department. I have 1 hand--
Handy: Cover for me will ya? I need to talk to my employer about this.
Russell: Sure. Hope tu get things straightened out. I don't want to have to see anyone walk the plank, so to speak. *a moment later*
Handy: Yo, Lumpy! I need a word with tu as soon as possible!
Lumpy: What, what do tu want? I was trying to take a nap!
Handy: Save your sleep-deprivation story; I don't want to fucking hear it. Why hire me if I don't have any hands?
Lumpy: Uh... tu have feet right?
Handy: Oh, forget it! I quit.
Lumpy: Uh... WHAT?
Handy: And I'm gonna enjoy this every last bit. *headbutts shelf of maces and swords, which are conveniently placed where hola will all fall on Lumpy* How tu like me now, bitch?
(Lumpy gets más holes in him than Swiss cheese; dies and then the maces pound him to a paste. What makes it over the top: Handy decides to use his feet to grab a jar and slide the pasty remains of Lumpy into it and sells it. Splendid buys it then spreads it on his sandwich. Unfortunately, he died of comida poisoning later that day. 2 Dead, 9 Still on borrowed time)
*a moment after that*
Russell: Handy, what happened?
Handy: I shish-kebabed Lumpy. I told him I quit this job before I killed him though, so good luck filling in for me permanently.
*At the dulces shop, Nutty decides to look around, and Cuddles is there as well.*
Nutty: Holy sugar shit, is there anything they DON'T have here?
Cuddles: OK, 1, did tu just say "holy sugar shit"? And 2, they don't have chicks here.
Nutty: ...Chicks?
Cuddles: Women. Babes. "The Ladies." tu got me?
Nutty: Sorry, man, unless they're made of candy, I'm not interested.
Cuddles: How fucked up in the head are you, man?
Nutty: That information, like my favorito! dulces of all time, is classified.
Cuddles: That's the first time I've heard something that actually could make sense come out of your mouth.
Nutty: Cookie?
Cuddles: tu paying for it?
Nutty: Yes...
Cuddles: Sure.
Nutty: Kidding!! *shoves cookie right through Cuddles' stomach* I ain't paying for bloodstained cookies, man.
Cuddles: You... tu sick... bastard... *dies due both to blood loss and that gaping hole in his GI tract. 3 Dead 8 Still on borrowed time(I'm saying that since usually, very few of them stay alive throughout an episode)*
*back at the regular grocery store*
Pop: What's the holdup? My kid's hungry as hell, and I'm missing the ballgame!
Cub: *sad, hungry baby talk, with the occasional fit of crying*
Pop: I know, son, but we'll be outta here soon.
Russell: tu can actually understand him?
Pop: Well, I read a couple baby books... So yes.
Russell: Who's the mother?
Pop: (Before we go any further... is Pop even MARRIED??) *sighs* To be honest, I don't know. I'm gonna have to go on that ripoff trash talk mostrar Laurie(a spoof on Maury) just to figure that out.
Russell: Sorry to hear that. Your total comes to 6 of those coins.(Well, tu see the show. They pay for things with SOMETHING.)
Pop: Here tu go. *runs out of the store* If we hurry, we can catch them after the 7th inning stretch.
*Just as they mere onto the highway, a tanker truck jackknifed and flipped over, hitting Pop's car and causing a fiery explosion. Neither Pop nor Cub survived. Handy was also driving inicial when this happened, but he was ahead of the truck at the time. 5 dead, 6 still on borrowed time*
*a few hours later, back at Flippy's*
Petunia: And... Done.
Giggles: Wow. This looks great.
Petunia: Thanks. Let me get the others, assuming they still live, and we can surprise Flippy. *calls Nutty*
Nutty, over the phone: Hey, Petunia, what's up? I just violated Cuddles with a cookie a couple hours hace and ended up killing him.
Petunia: *tries to hold in barf* Oh god! Well, get your culo over here so we can surprise Flippy in his own house.
Nutty: Sure thing. *brings a 3-kilogram bag of dulces with him*
Petunia: *calls Handy*
Handy, using his foot to answer his phone: Hey, mind not talking to me while I'm driving? I had to use my feet just to put tu on speaker.
Petunia: Sorry... Just wondering if tu can make it to Flippy's house so tu can help us surprise him.
Handy: Sure, be right over. Just don't bother asking Pop; he and his kid died in a tanker truck explosion. o Lumpy; I killed him.
Petunia: What about Russell?
Handy: I gave him my cashier position; turns out hands are important for making change.
Petunia: Well, see tu there.
*Flippy just arrived*
Flippy: Wow... 24 innings. Didn't know the best players of the Bears were hibernating. At least we beat the Skunks 10-8. It'll be nice to relax at home, watch some soaps, maybe a race...
*everyone yells SURPRISE!*
Flippy: What the?!??! *starts to turn murderous*
Petunia: Everyone stay calm. he doesn't always do this immediately.
Flippy: Nope. Decapititation!! *turns homicidal*
(Flippy turns on Nutty first, finding a bayoneta and cutting his head open. He then eats Nutty's brain; it's almost as sweet as his candy. He then pulls a double kill on petunia and Giggles, repeatedly bashing their heads against the wall. He then tosses the two into the fire, where they roast. He then reverts to happy normal Flippy, but not before he scores 3 más kills for the show. 8 dead, 3 alive at the end of this episode.)
Hope tu like it. It's my first time escritura a fanfic here.
This episode will feature Flippy(obviously), Giggles, Cuddles, Nutty and Petunia. Other appearances: Pop and Cub(oh god, I have to use baby speak), Lumpy(Public Enemy No. 1.), Splendid, Handy, and Russell. Some of these characters will have no lines, but may be killed with some of the others. Well, here I go with this bloody trainwreck.
*The episode starts out with Giggles and petunia in Flippy's house getting everything ready. From here on, I will have a running dead/alive count.*
Petunia: Flippy is gonna amor this. Hey, Giggles, mind moving those balloons a few inches to your right?
Giggles: Sure. tu may have OCD, but at lest tu know how to throw the perfect party. Why do tu obsess about your own body, as well as everything tu see, being so damn clean, my apparent potty mouth excepted?
Petunia: Because, Giggles, cleanliness is siguiente to Godliness. If not everything is clean, then my OCD takes over and I can't control myself. As for the language, I'm not gonna go and shove soap in everyone's mouths. That's wasteful.
Giggles: Oh. *The scene shifts to Handy trying to work the cashier escritorio at the grocery store. tu see... he has no hands.*
Handy: Come on, tu stupid-ass piece of--
Russell: Need help there, buddy?
Handy: Look at me. I have no hands. How does someone like me get a job that requires tu use your hands IF tu DON'T FUCKING HAVE ANY?
Russell: I'm not doing much better in that department. I have 1 hand--
Handy: Cover for me will ya? I need to talk to my employer about this.
Russell: Sure. Hope tu get things straightened out. I don't want to have to see anyone walk the plank, so to speak. *a moment later*
Handy: Yo, Lumpy! I need a word with tu as soon as possible!
Lumpy: What, what do tu want? I was trying to take a nap!
Handy: Save your sleep-deprivation story; I don't want to fucking hear it. Why hire me if I don't have any hands?
Lumpy: Uh... tu have feet right?
Handy: Oh, forget it! I quit.
Lumpy: Uh... WHAT?
Handy: And I'm gonna enjoy this every last bit. *headbutts shelf of maces and swords, which are conveniently placed where hola will all fall on Lumpy* How tu like me now, bitch?
(Lumpy gets más holes in him than Swiss cheese; dies and then the maces pound him to a paste. What makes it over the top: Handy decides to use his feet to grab a jar and slide the pasty remains of Lumpy into it and sells it. Splendid buys it then spreads it on his sandwich. Unfortunately, he died of comida poisoning later that day. 2 Dead, 9 Still on borrowed time)
*a moment after that*
Russell: Handy, what happened?
Handy: I shish-kebabed Lumpy. I told him I quit this job before I killed him though, so good luck filling in for me permanently.
*At the dulces shop, Nutty decides to look around, and Cuddles is there as well.*
Nutty: Holy sugar shit, is there anything they DON'T have here?
Cuddles: OK, 1, did tu just say "holy sugar shit"? And 2, they don't have chicks here.
Nutty: ...Chicks?
Cuddles: Women. Babes. "The Ladies." tu got me?
Nutty: Sorry, man, unless they're made of candy, I'm not interested.
Cuddles: How fucked up in the head are you, man?
Nutty: That information, like my favorito! dulces of all time, is classified.
Cuddles: That's the first time I've heard something that actually could make sense come out of your mouth.
Nutty: Cookie?
Cuddles: tu paying for it?
Nutty: Yes...
Cuddles: Sure.
Nutty: Kidding!! *shoves cookie right through Cuddles' stomach* I ain't paying for bloodstained cookies, man.
Cuddles: You... tu sick... bastard... *dies due both to blood loss and that gaping hole in his GI tract. 3 Dead 8 Still on borrowed time(I'm saying that since usually, very few of them stay alive throughout an episode)*
*back at the regular grocery store*
Pop: What's the holdup? My kid's hungry as hell, and I'm missing the ballgame!
Cub: *sad, hungry baby talk, with the occasional fit of crying*
Pop: I know, son, but we'll be outta here soon.
Russell: tu can actually understand him?
Pop: Well, I read a couple baby books... So yes.
Russell: Who's the mother?
Pop: (Before we go any further... is Pop even MARRIED??) *sighs* To be honest, I don't know. I'm gonna have to go on that ripoff trash talk mostrar Laurie(a spoof on Maury) just to figure that out.
Russell: Sorry to hear that. Your total comes to 6 of those coins.(Well, tu see the show. They pay for things with SOMETHING.)
Pop: Here tu go. *runs out of the store* If we hurry, we can catch them after the 7th inning stretch.
*Just as they mere onto the highway, a tanker truck jackknifed and flipped over, hitting Pop's car and causing a fiery explosion. Neither Pop nor Cub survived. Handy was also driving inicial when this happened, but he was ahead of the truck at the time. 5 dead, 6 still on borrowed time*
*a few hours later, back at Flippy's*
Petunia: And... Done.
Giggles: Wow. This looks great.
Petunia: Thanks. Let me get the others, assuming they still live, and we can surprise Flippy. *calls Nutty*
Nutty, over the phone: Hey, Petunia, what's up? I just violated Cuddles with a cookie a couple hours hace and ended up killing him.
Petunia: *tries to hold in barf* Oh god! Well, get your culo over here so we can surprise Flippy in his own house.
Nutty: Sure thing. *brings a 3-kilogram bag of dulces with him*
Petunia: *calls Handy*
Handy, using his foot to answer his phone: Hey, mind not talking to me while I'm driving? I had to use my feet just to put tu on speaker.
Petunia: Sorry... Just wondering if tu can make it to Flippy's house so tu can help us surprise him.
Handy: Sure, be right over. Just don't bother asking Pop; he and his kid died in a tanker truck explosion. o Lumpy; I killed him.
Petunia: What about Russell?
Handy: I gave him my cashier position; turns out hands are important for making change.
Petunia: Well, see tu there.
*Flippy just arrived*
Flippy: Wow... 24 innings. Didn't know the best players of the Bears were hibernating. At least we beat the Skunks 10-8. It'll be nice to relax at home, watch some soaps, maybe a race...
*everyone yells SURPRISE!*
Flippy: What the?!??! *starts to turn murderous*
Petunia: Everyone stay calm. he doesn't always do this immediately.
Flippy: Nope. Decapititation!! *turns homicidal*
(Flippy turns on Nutty first, finding a bayoneta and cutting his head open. He then eats Nutty's brain; it's almost as sweet as his candy. He then pulls a double kill on petunia and Giggles, repeatedly bashing their heads against the wall. He then tosses the two into the fire, where they roast. He then reverts to happy normal Flippy, but not before he scores 3 más kills for the show. 8 dead, 3 alive at the end of this episode.)
Hope tu like it. It's my first time escritura a fanfic here.