We watched them meet…

DEAN: Hi.

RORY: Hi.

DEAN: I don't know tu at all but I want tu to know that I watch you.

RORY: tu watch me?

DEAN: Yeah. I stare at tu like a stalker while tu read about whales. Aren't I sweet?

RORY: Yeah! Hey, why don't I get tu a job at Doose's as a bagboy so that all the future guys in my life can make fun of you?

DEAN: Sure! Hey, guess what? I'm annoyingly tall!

We watched them meet each other's families…

DEAN: I know a lot about Willy Wonka! He's my favorito! chocolateer!

LORELAI: Er… why don't tu registrarse us for our corazón attack inducing pig-out?

DEAN: Sure! I'll meet tu at your house once I'm done working my strangely long shift.

LORELAI: I'll tell tu where I live.

DEAN: That's okay. I already know. I like to stalk Rory, remember?

LORELAI: Riiiiiight…

RORY: Want some cookies?

CLARA: Deeeean!

RORY: No, no! I'm not a drug peddler! I promise!

CLARA: DEEEEAAAAAN!

RORY: Bye! [runs down the calle despite the fact that we are told repeatedly that Gilmore Girls do not run]

We watched them fall in love…

RORY: Can tu afford all this food?

DEAN: Yeah, I never stop working, remember? Unless, of course, I'm playing tonsil hockey with you.

RORY: Okay. Want to eat any of the comida you're buying for me?

DEAN: Nah, I'll just watch tu eat.

RORY: That's not creepy… [Rory takes one bite]

DEAN: Okay, you're done! Let's go to the car basura shop. [pulls her por the hand]

RORY: Okay! That doesn't sound dangerous at all!

DEAN: I'm annoying tall!

We watched them break up…

DEAN: I built this car for you.

RORY: Aw! This is definitely structurally sound, especially if it was made por a seventeen año old guy who's either working o besar me!
DEAN: I amor you.

RORY: …

DEAN: I can't believe you're not answering even though I didn't even give tu thirty segundos to collect your thoughts and realize that your first boyfriend—that you've been going out for only three months—told tu that he loved you.

RORY: …

DEAN: I amor you. I amor how we only fight over trivial problems and how every time we have different opinions, I make excuses and ignore tu until tu apologize!

RORY: …

DEAN: Fine! We're over!

RORY: [to Dean's retreating figure] You're annoyingly tall!

We watched them struggle without each other…

RORY: I can't ever buy groceries again.

LANE: Fortunately for you, Taylor banned tu after tu estola his maíz starch.

RORY: That was Dean's fault. He led me to believe I would get free pop and then proceeded to kiss me, causing the first real fight I've had with my abnormally close mother. But, I still miss him?

LANE: Why?

RORY: He's just so tall! And he makes me feel so safe… [a goofy grin appears on Rory's face]

LANE: Yeah, well so can a straight jacket.

LANE: Hi Science Partner!

DEAN: Your mother just sent me to hell.

LANE: She does that.

DEAN: Should we proceed to totally ignoring our science project and talking about Rory?

LANE: Uh…

DEAN: Does she miss me? Huh? Huh?

LANE: I thought there was an unspoken rule that we weren't going to talk about Rory.

DEAN: I didn't hear any rule…

LANE: That's what an unspoken rule mea—never mind.

We watched them make up…

DEAN: [waiting in front of Chilton because he has nowhere else to be] Oh my god! Rory's talking to another guy! I can't believe how often she totally disregards my feelings!

RORY: [falls over herself to get to the Jolly Green Giant] Dean!

DEAN: Why's he carrying your books?

RORY: Dean!

DEAN: I'm leaving overdramatically!

RORY: No Dean! That hot guy over there who's carrying my libros and has a secret crush on me is just a friend! Actually, I hate him!

DEAN: Yeah, right. I don't trust me even though I expect tu to trust me blindly and unconditionally!

RORY: Please Dean!

DEAN: I thought tu were harassing my sister to try and talk to me. I guess I was wrong. [turns to leave]

RORY: I amor you, tu idiot!

DEAN: I'm not an idiot! [proceeds to turn around and showcase the most public P.O. I have ever seen on Gilmore Girls]

RORY: How does your neck never hurt?

We watched the jealousy…

DEAN: I hate Jess!

RORY: He's just my friend, Dean!

DEAN: I hate Jess!

RORY: There's nothing going on between us. We just have lots in common, great chemistry, and he's completely adorable!

DEAN: I hate Jess!

RORY: [gazes dreamily into the distance] He does these really cute magic tricks. All tu can do is bag grocery items.

DEAN: I hate Jess!

RORY: I hate Jess, too!

We watched them break up… again.

DEAN: I can't believe you're looking at Jess!

RORY: I can't help it if my eyes graze over him from time to time! You're spinning me around so much that I need something to focus on, and your face is too high up.

DEAN: I hate that the two of tu are friends!

RORY: Well, you're friends with Lindsay! tu know, once she bought me a Mark Twain head magnet. Yup.

DEAN: That's it! I'm going to cruelly and rashly dump tu in front of a whole bunch of people and impressively storm out, leaving tu along and sobbing in the middle of the dance floor.

We watched them become friends with benefits…

DEAN: Hi. I have two jobs because I amor Lindsay.

RORY: What an ungrateful bi—

DEAN: Hey, I changed my mind. Our marriage isn't working out and I'm in amor with you!

RORY: Really? Well, I'm lonely and depressed. Let's ruin one of the most important days of my mom's life por sleeping together.

DEAN: Okay! Let's do it on your old, childhood cama because sleeping with a married man isn't awkward enough.

RORY: Okay! por the way, why aren't tu and Lindsay working out?

DEAN: Because I treat her like crap since I'm so hung up on tu and I refuse to mover on and find someone else.

RORY: Cool! I'll mistake that for amor and use that excuse for the summer-long estrangement with my mother.

We watched them get together for the THIRD time…

RORY: So, what's going to happen between tu and Lindsay?

DEAN: Lindsay? Who's Lindsay?

RORY: Your wife, remember…?

DEAN: Oh, right! Just wait here, okay? I'm going to go divorce my wife and then we can go do it in a car.

RORY: Okay!

DEAN: This relationship is totally awkward and stale but I still amor you!

RORY: Yeah… I wonder when Amy Sherman-Palladino is gonna let me ditch you.

We watched them break up AGAIN…

RORY: Oops… I left my boyfriend waiting outside for half an hour. [hurries out]

DEAN: [sees Rory with her friends] This isn't going to work out.

RORY: [exasperated look] Big surprise.

DEAN: I don't fit in here. Look at those big city folk with their fancy suits. I don't even own a suit!
RORY: We can get past that! I'll buy tu a suit!

DEAN: No! tu have too many friends and I'm the equivalence to an insecure fifteen año old boy! We can't see each other anymore and I'm going to twist and contort the reason until I've convinced everyone, including myself, that it was all your fault.

RORY: Well… bye!

LOGAN: [appears out of nowhere] tu just got dumped?

RORY: Yup.

LOGAN: Well, let's get tu drunk! Nothing solves problems better than alcohol!

RORY: Okay! Hey, how about later tu change me into something I'm not and steal a yacht with me?

LOGAN: Sure, let me just say goodbye to some bridesmaids.

RORY: And I'll go to Philly and shamelessly use Jess!

LOGAN: Meet tu in London!

We watched the after affects…

DEAN: Hi Luke.

LUKE: …Er, hi.

DEAN: I'm drunk.

LUKE: Evidently.

DEAN: I'm drunk and I'm in amor with Rory.

LUKE: Thanks for sharing.

DEAN: I'm drunk, I'm in amor with Rory, and I spend my evenings playing arcade games away from my wife.

LUKE: Aw, geez.

A little while later outside the Twickam House/Museum…

LUKE: What's up, man?

DEAN: Lorelai's so gonna ditch you.

LUKE: Excuse me?

DEAN: You're screwed, Luke! The Gilmore Girls are sent here por the Devil to play with our hearts and then dump us even though we did nothing wrong!

LUKE: Can I get tu some water? o some Demerol?

DEAN: We're exactly alike! Except for the fact that you're a successful cena, comedor owner who's about to get married and live happily ever after with the amor of your life, and I'm a bitter, tall divorcee that can't do the simple action of letting go of a girlfriend that I was with when I was sixteen.

LUKE: [at a loss for words] …You're totally insane.

DEAN: [gets frustrated with Luke's lack of caring] I'm annoyingly tall!

LORELAI: Hey... what every happened to Dean Forrester?

RORY: Who cares?